I don't eat chicken. LOL Your secret is safe with me.

It's always helpful when the terrorists identify themselves.

I thought all terrorist were muslim? Wouldn't it be pork?

All terrorists try to confuse me. ALL BATTERIES FIRE AT WILL!!!!!!!!

i think the food would do that for you

Just got off the phone with a lifetime friend back east who's in the hospital after getting 12" of his guts removed for health reasons. We've known each other since the mid 70s. Been through everything together. Everything.

We hadn't spoken for at least 5-6 years but immediately fell right into our old familiar groove. As old age creeps in this **** is priceless. I love this guy and he loves me. We would kill for each other.

And if I drop dead tomorrow he will be right there to pick up Lin and the kids.

One of the coolest aspects of life. I can't stop smiling right now.

I'd be more than happy to send your hot daughter a card when you kick the bucket.

Oh, and apparently I've gotten the whole store giving food to the seagulls hanging out by the drive-thru at work. The smartest seagull of all, Larry, who knows to stand right under the drive-thru window, has even won over the put-upon drive thru dude, who has been annoyed by my antics this entire time, because without any of my prodding, drive thru dude gave Larry some hashbrowns (we're morning crew, straight up) cause "Larry looked up at me, and... **** it."

Got an internship today. Unpaid, but it means that I'm set to graduate if I don't get fired.

You're fired