God damn it. My room shares a wall with the bathroom and there are workmen basically tearing it apart ATM. Even hideously loud music on my headphones does almost nothing to drown out what I assume is a small sledgehammer relentlessly smashing something or other.

Admittedly, I think that's probably the least of my problems, since the only bathroom in the house will be completely unusable for up to two weeks, meaning that I'm going to have to shower in the backyard with a hose, pee in a two-litre bottle, and **** in a glorified bucket with industrial-strength trash bags IN MY OWN BEDROOM. Thank god I work six days a week in a building with a bathroom, and that there's a library five minutes away, so I hopefully won't have to **** in my bucket unless it's a dire emergency at ten o'clock at night.

God damn it. Now I have to pee, and while I don't regret buying the beer, it is rather annoying that I'm going to have to empty the actual soda from my two-liter in a few minutes.

Can you piss in your backyard?

**** yeah, at night. But it's 2:24 pm, there are people in the house, and our privacy fence is not perfect. When I go for a cigarette in a bit then I'll find a nice secluded spot to take a whizz, but until then a bottle is just more convenient at a moment's notice.

But I now wish I would've gotten a bottle with a wider mouth, as it's now kind of exciting to piss, since there's the very real possibility that my hand might slip and my dick could go flying off in a terrible direction... and then comes the clean up.

this is the most batlord problem ive ever heard

This is why I tried to be as blunt as possible. It's not everyday The Batlord has this kind of gold to deliver unto the world, so it his obligation to give it to them good.

Now if you'll excuse me, the beer is getting to me, and I have to make a second deposit in the Bank of the Two-Liter Bottle of Shasta Fruit Punch.

Really?! Is that some kind of medical condition?

fds

Foon dick syndrome?

Bat: Tell me the brand and model of the guitar in your avatar and I'll give you one thousand bucks.

Is this some Big Dick Guitar Syndrome thing? Cause I don't give a flying **** what that guitar is. Maybe you shouldn't either.