Originally Posted by Man like Monkey

25k

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

Today’s To Do
Walk Dog Check
Put Coolant in Car Check
Eat Breakfast at Buffet Check
Curl Up With Dog Check
Take Xanax
Read Post Music Sleep

Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien

There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.

Originally Posted by elphenor

Had the worst day of my life yesterday

was cold as **** for no reason it's goddamn April and I was trying to hawk timeshares at an outdoor mall impossible when your balls are ice cubes

then when I head home my car runs out of gas 9 miles from home and I realize I am utterly boned

my paper check is sitting on my desk at home, I lost my credit card, there is 9 cents in my checking, my phone battery is also dead

I sit there and stew in my stupidity for an hour and a cop pulls up, I tell him I'm out of fuel he goes "you gotta gas can" nah I don't, he pulls off (my tags were expired but he didn't check that's something)

I say **** it and embark on the longest walk of my life with hardly any sidewalk, having not eaten yet I collapse a couple times in the unkempt grass, I traverse narrow tightrope medians with traffic to my back, you can hear a car approach from a mile away

however worst of all is just the persistent cold getting worse and worse as it approaches midnight

when I arrive home it is Saturday night and my roommates are out and I come to the sad realization I left my garage door opener in my abandoned car

I sit in the cold for another unbearable hour embracing death

Originally Posted by Man like Monkey

another upside to be crusty.

What dog do you have mate?

Originally Posted by elphenor

Had the worst day of my life yesterday

was cold as **** for no reason it's goddamn April and I was trying to hawk timeshares at an outdoor mall impossible when your balls are ice cubes

then when I head home my car runs out of gas 9 miles from home and I realize I am utterly boned

my paper check is sitting on my desk at home, I lost my credit card, there is 9 cents in my checking, my phone battery is also dead

I sit there and stew in my stupidity for an hour and a cop pulls up, I tell him I'm out of fuel he goes "you gotta gas can" nah I don't, he pulls off (my tags were expired but he didn't check that's something)

I say **** it and embark on the longest walk of my life with hardly any sidewalk, having not eaten yet I collapse a couple times in the unkempt grass, I traverse narrow tightrope medians with traffic to my back, you can hear a car approach from a mile away

however worst of all is just the persistent cold getting worse and worse as it approaches midnight

when I arrive home it is Saturday night and my roommates are out and I come to the sad realization I left my garage door opener in my abandoned car

I sit in the cold for another unbearable hour embracing death

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

Toy Fox Terrier

Got in a 3 hour nap without even taking a Xanax woke up she’s sleeping right next to me her beautiful ass inches from my nose

Then to make things even sweeter I drop the most gigantic growler with like no effort. Best crap this month and it only took three quick wipes it so non-sticky

It was that greasy pizza from cicis. It’s like engineered to turn into the best s hit on the planet. Goddamn this is the good life.

Originally Posted by elphenor

I think I mentioned before I procrastinated getting direct deposit

so I had a fat check at home, it just wasn't in my account because bank is closed