I don't miss the giant flying ones they had in Florida.

Put some peanut butter on your dick and see if it licks it or just nibbles.

Those really big ones don’t like to live indoors. They just end up in there wandering about.

It’s the small ones that ruin your ****ing life. Infest your appliances and ****.

That's true but the big ones are terrifying

I've seen them infest a shed/ garage before too.. it was traumatic

Luckily I only ever had the one infestation that ended after a few months or so. But it was some real **** that everyone should have to go through so they know the human dwelling isn't some magical place where nature stops and human hegemony reigns uncontested.

If you keep wood around then yeah. They live in a dead oak tree near my entrance way. I’ve had those bitches crawl up on me several times. I used to not even be close to capable of killing one with my bare hand but I will now and just throw it in the garbage. Those bitches float so they’re hard to flush. I’ve seen my dog eat one lol. She puked it up later. Dogs man. They’re in an evolutionary cluster****. The only survival adaptation they have is be nice to people. Some people think dogs are smart. They know how not to bite the hand that feeds them and not much more.

You get the wrong neighbor and landlord and you ain’t getting rid of those little ****s.

Dog ownership is beautiful but kind of sick if you look at it in a certain way. The kindest and most loving lifeform we know of was bred to be so by a race of violent apes to be their friendly slaves. Is that how we change the human race to be better? Directed breeding and authoritarian behavioral conditioning? Literal fascism?

You know my honest answer to that.

We'd need to give our society over to unquestioned AI overlords or aliens to make that happen. Just imagine if German shepherds were in charge of breeding pugs. Poor bow-legged pugs.