In Valen's name!

I only read off-and-on because I've been super busy lately, but it looks like I'm going to have to dive into your archives, because I wholeheartedly agree. B5 is my favorite SF series of all time, warts and all.

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Season Two: "The coming of Shadows"
2.15 “And now for a word”
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“36 Hours on Babylon 5” is a special news programme filmed by ISN, InterStellar News Network, to give people back on Earth an idea of what happens on the station, and perhaps more importantly, where their tax credits are going. The first thing the news crew sees on arriving at the station is a Centauri vessel being attacked, and destroyed, by a Narn ship. Cynthia Torqueman, the investigative journalist heading the programme, interviews Londo, who of course plays up the “peaceful Centauri” angle --- odd, considering they started the war --- and G’Kar, who has no comment he says until he talks to his government.

When he does, he comes back with a shocking statement: the Centauri ship that was destroyed is said to have been transporting weapons of mass destruction to ships bound for the front line, and he will not allow this to happen. The Narn will set up a blockade and refuse entry to any Centauri ship. Torqueman intimates to her viewers that it may be time to consider shutting down the station, that it is a waste of money. A senator interviewed does not exactly give the station a ringing endorsement. She interviews the command staff, but of course they’re aware they’re on the record, and everyone is very careful not to say anything controversial. The aliens don’t fare quite so well, especially Delenn. Unused to human deception and manipulation, she is surprised and horrified when Torqueman tries to needle her about her appearance, her transformation, and openly calls her out on it, telling her she is a travesty and is mocking humanity. G’Kar calls a council meeting to reveal to all that after Ivanova has made a detailed investigation of his claims they have been confirmed: the Centauri vessel was carrying WMDs, and he believes the other ships berthed here are similarly laden. He demands they be impounded and inspected, but Londo warns that the ships will defend themselves if approached to give up their “cargo”. The situation, to Torqueman’s thinly-disguised and ghoulish delight, already precarious is threatening to spin right out of control.

And so it does. Narn fighters attack Centauri ships and there is a pitched battle going on outside Babylon 5. Sheridan scrambles the station’s Starfuries, hoping to re-establish order, but he knows that should his ships open fire both races will consider this an act of war. However he has no choice: his station is being made into a warzone and he cannot allow it to continue. After two ships have been destroyed both sides stand down, and Sheridan demands a meeting with the two ambassadors. Before that, Torqueman interviews them both, and not surprisingly each gives a different picture of the other, painting themselves in the best light.

A Centauri battlecruiser comes through the gate, blockading Babylon 5 until the Centauri ships held there are allowed to leave. Londo is very clear that lethal force may and will be used if necessary. Another standoff. Sheridan calls their bluff, believing it to be such, and places the defence grid on standyby, telling the Centuri cruiser that if any ship entering or leaving Babylon 5 is targeted they will respond with deadly force. His resolve works and the ship is allowed to leave, but before they can celebrate a Narn cruiser comes through the gate. It attacks and destroys the Centauri ship, despite repeated orders from Sheridan not to engage, and then in trying to escape, badly damaged, it explodes.

QUOTES
G’Kar: “They (the Centauri) have turned Babylon 5 into a weapons supply post, and we cannot allow this to continue. Even if it means shutting down Babylon 5 permanently.”

Sheridan: “It smacks of jingoism and self-deception and armchair quarterbacking. Any time you lose a war you just wait a few years and you’ll hear from everyone who thinks we could have won if they had done the fighting.”
Torqueman: “Except of course, Captain, we didn’t lose the war. The Minbari did surrender."
Sheridan: “Oh. Of course.”

Torqueman: “Over a quarter of a million humans were killed in the war with your people. How do you think the families of those victims would feel about your change?”
Delenn: “I don’t know. I would hope they would understand.”
Torqueman: “I think they would be hurt, betrayed; that by taking a human face you’re taking a part of us you’re not entitled to. What would you say to them? To all the husbands and wives and children and brothers and sisters of the people who were killed in the war with your people, and now see a Minbari with a human face?”

Torqueman: “Why do you think they (the Centauri) invaded back then?”
G’Kar: “Why does any advanced civilisation seek to destroy a less advanced one? Because the land is strategically valuable, because there are resources they can cultivate and exploit, but mostly, because they can.You have experienced much the same on your own world. There are humans for whom the words “never again” carry special meaning. As they do for us.”

Delenn (in response to Torqueman’s question, is it worth keeping Babylon 5?): “Of course it is. For the simple reasons that nobody else would have built a place like this. Humans share one unique quality: they create communities. If the Narns or the Centauri, or any other race had built Babylon 5 it would be used only for their own people. But wherever humans go they create communities out of diverse and sometimes hostile populations. It is a great gift, a terrible responsibility, and one that cannot be abandoned.”

Sheridan (to the same question): “Yes, but not for any of the reasons you’ve probably been told. The job of Babylon 5 is not to enforce the peace, it’s to create the peace. This place was built on the assumption that we could work out our problems and build a better future. And that, to me, is the key issue. See, in the last few years, we’ve stumbled. We stumbled at the death of the president, at the war, on and on. And when you stumble a lot, you start looking at your feet. We have to make people lift their eyes back to the horizon, and see the line of ancestors behind us saying, make my life have meaning. And to our inheritors before us saying, create the world that we will live in. We’re not just holding down jobs and having dinner, we are in the process of building the future. That’s what Babylon 5 is all about. Only by making people understand that can we hope to create a better world for ourselves and for posterity.”

Important Arc Plot Points
Back home
Arc Level : Red
Most of this is dealt with in the section below, but the ISN programme is surely Clarke’s way of ensuring that he besmirches the reputation of Babylon 5, already at a very low popularity level with people on Earth. Torqueman (surely no coincidence that her name is very close to the famous Spanish Inquisition leader, Torquemada?) has almost certainly been sent to B5 with an agenda: get all the dirt you can on the station, and on its crew. Ensure that the folks back home see that the aliens are running the place, that they are a threat to humanity. Paint it in the blackest light you can, while not of course being obvious. Twist the facts: you’re a news reporter, you’ll be used to that. Make people wonder why we’re bothering spending millions of tax credits on this floating liability, that is being utilised more or less exclusively for the benefit of the alien races.

Clarke wants to shut Babylon 5 down. He probably was against it in the first place, and now that he’s president he’s determined to get rid of it. Apart from the money spent on it which he would surely use to shore up Earth’s defences against a possible Centauri attack, I believe that at this stage reports have reached him, from Bester, Cranston, others, that Sheridan is not to be trusted and is not one of his men. To have such a man --- a decorated war hero, popular with the people --- in charge of what could be an orbital battle platform does not seem to him to be a good idea. And yet only a few episodes ago he sent armaments to the place. So what is he up to? Maybe he wants to close it down and reopen it as an exclusively Earth-driven and military outpost to keep an eye on the aliens? The chances of the Centauri attacking Earth, once they’ve defeated the Narns --- which quite obviously they will do, sooner or later --- may seem remote at this stage, but the Centauri Republic is now a resurgent power, stretching out its hand and reclaiming territories it lost. An expanding empire can only go one way, and those in its path will be conquered, enslaved or destroyed. Londo might laugh at the idea of attacking his “good friends the Earthers”, but others in the court may have different ideas.

By withdrawing into itself and preparing the best defences it can, Clarke believes Earth can best serve its own interests and keep out of the interstellar wars. Babylon 5 is a major obstacle to that goal, openly inviting aliens in and, proven here, allowing them or giving them an opportunity at least to make of the station their own private battleground. Why allow this to continue? What is the point? Far better to arm the station, kick off all non-Earth (and those seen to be disloyal) occupants and close the place up as a bastion of his government, a floating battleship in space. Sheridan of course would fight this, and he can’t remove him legitimately without good reason, as Clarke still has, for now, as we have seen, his opponents in the Senate and in the military, and the last thing he wants right now is a civil war, a power struggle.

But if he can turn popular opinion against the captain, show people how he is mismanaging and failing at his job, that the aliens are calling the shots and he is either powerless to stop them or worse in league with them, why then the people of Earth would demand his resignation, reassignment or even arrest! And Clarke would be only too happy to oblige, for after all, he serves the will of the people. “36 Hours on Babylon 5” has been nothing but a giant propaganda exercise, using ISN and helped by IPX, who are a sponsor of the show, both of whom will become two of the president’s staunchest allies.

In fairness to Cynthia Torqueman, it may be that she does not realise she is being used, if she is. She may think she’s doing an honest, unbiased story and she may not have any links to Clarke because at this time ISN is still fairly independent, but it will not stay that way long, as we will see in later episodes and seasons.

Darkness ascending
As things begin to show signs of turning ugly back home, as pro-Earth and anti-alien agendas seem to receive tacit, even open support and approval from Earthgov, I’ll be chronicling here the shift in policy back on Earth with the ascension of President Clarke. Unlike Hitler, he won’t be burning down any buildings or making a power grab, but slowly, insidiously and just as effectively, those who raise dissenting voices will be made disappear as easily as in any third-world tinpot dictatorship, as Earth slowly and inexorably moves towards a global police state.

Here we see the creeping effects of Clarke’s propaganda beginning to seep into what will become one of his most powerful tools, the media. Introducing “36 Hours on Babylon 5”, the newscaster describes Mars colony as “Plagued by scattered groups of separatists, who have used acts of terror to intimidate the Earth-loyal majority”, already skewing the facts. Most of Mars wants independence, but that doesn’t suit Clarke, and as in many cases down through history the freedom fighters and those who advocate separation from Earth are classed as “terrorists”, “agitators” and “troublemakers.” Already ISN is becoming --- if it wasn’t already --- the mouthpiece of the Clarke administration, the Fox News of the twenty-third century.

It’s also interesting that the programme is sponsored by IPX, InterPlanetary Expeditions, who we have met briefly in season one, but who will turn out to have more than a somewhat vested interest in keeping the man in power who currently occupies the highest position on Earth.

During a commercial break in “36 Hours on Babylon 5”, ISN screens a recruitment advertisement for Psi Corps, in which the dark organisation makes themselves out to be everyone’s friend, only interested in helping those who have telepathic ability which is undeveloped reach their full potential. It’s about as balanced as a pre-election stab at the opposition two weeks before voting day. Clean-cut kid, sexy but respectable single mother, lantern-jawed Psi Cop somehow teleporting in (teleportation is far in advance of anything Earth technology currently has, but if anyone has it it would be Psi Corps. Mind you, they wouldn’t want to advertise it so I assume this is just a special effect, a way of telling people that the Corps are on hand whenever needed. It’s also a good way of warning people that they’re always there…) with a somewhat chilling: “We’re everywhere.” Then adding, with a tight false smile, “For your convenience.” Yeah… And a flashframe on screen whispers “Trust the Corps. The Corps is your friend.”

There is even a segment thrown in where it’s claimed that recent polls shows Clarke’s popularity and approval ratings at record highs. This may be true, given the general animosity of humans towards aliens, and they may be glad that the new president is pulling back sharply from the policies of social, political, military and societal integration that his predecessor pursued. Or it could all be lies. Clarke will be anxious to have himself seen in a favourable light, and who after all is going to question these possibly mythic polls?


SKETCHES
Ambassador G'Kar
G’Kar’s story, as told to ISN’s Cynthia Torqueman: “My family lived in one of the larger cities on Narn, my father served in a Centauri household during the last years of the rebellion. I was barely a pouchling at the time. My mother was ill, unable to escape through the underground so we all stayed. It was a difficult time. We were striking deep into Centauri resources; things were tense. One day my father spilled a cup of hot jhala on the mistress of the house. And she had him killed. They took him out, tied his hands together and hung him from a jhavwa tree for three days. I came to him the last night, against my mother’s orders and he looked down at me. He said he was proud, to go and fight and be all the things he never was. And he died. The next morning I ran away and killed my first Centauri.”

This tells us a lot about G’Kar, and yet very little. He was brought up from an early age --- “Barely a pouchling” --- under not only Centauri occupation but in their service. As is always the way with the conquered who are put to work for the conquerors, they will despise one another, the latter for their weakness and the former for being enslaved. This hatred, then, for the Centauri has been built into G’Kar’s personality from almost the start: it’s nearly a genetic trait. His father served the oppressors and was killed by them for a trivial thing, though whether he served out of choice or not is not made clear. However his hatred for the invader is, and it would seem he was just a weak man --- or a strong one --- trying to protect his family by not getting into trouble. But from his dying words it is clear he wanted to fight the Centauri, and is proud his son will do so.

G’Kar has of course seen firsthand what the stripmining of his world has meant for Narn. I’m not entirely sure he was there for the invasion --- he does say he was very young and his father was already in servitude, so perhaps the planet had been conquered years before he was born, or before he was able to make any sense of it. In very real terms, he has lived under the Centauri occupation all his younger life and probably knew no other life, until the invader was pushed off their planet, and presumably he took part in that. His hatred for Londo Mollari, however, does not seem to stem from any personal dislike: he is simply a Centauri, and on Babylon 5, the highest ranking and most visible representative of a race who has subjugated G’Kar’s people in the past, and who is now on the way to doing so again. You can even see, in the brief interludes between their fighting and sniping and threats, that each holds the other in a certain kind of fond regard, a case perhaps of “another time, another place”...

But G’Kar’s relationship with Londo will always be teetering on the brink of savage anger and retribution, however close they get. The difference will be seen in the two very divergent paths the two men take, the one into darkness and damnation, the other … well, you’ll just have to wait and see, but let’s just say this much: we’re going to find there is a lot more to Ambassador G’Kar than at first meets the eye.

2.16 “In the shadow of Zha'dum”
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Mr. Morden is back on Babylon 5, and he has information for Londo. Sheridan is looking through the crew roster of the Icarus, the ship on which his wife died, when Garibaldi recognises Morden's face there. But everyone is supposed to have died in the crash. How could this one man be still alive when everyone else is dead? Sheridan sets out to find out all he can about the mysterious Mr. Morden. When he learns that the man is still on the station he has him taken into custody and begins to interrogate him. A representative from the newly-formed Ministry of Peace visits Talia, and asks her to help him talk to the station staff about some new initiatives that are being planned.

Seeing he is dead on his feet, Ivanova relieves Franklin temporarily of duty, tells him to get some sleep and something to eat. The Ministry of Peace introduces the concept of the Nightwatch, which is supposedly to be a security system within a security system; those who join are expected to “keep an eye on things” and report back to Earth. Most laugh at the idea, but there’s fifty credits a week extra going, so there’s no shortage of volunteers. Garibaldi warns Sheridan that he is sailing close to the wind; he has not charged Morden with anything, he is holding him without cause, but Sheridan refuses to let Morden go, leading to Garibaldi’s threat to resign, and his following through on this when Sheridan does not back down.

Zack Allan is put in charge in his absence, while Vir requests an audience with Sheridan, telling him that Morden is a guest of the Centauri Republic and as such has diplomatic immunity. Londo wants him released at once. But Sheridan points out that diplomatic immunity only applies if the person has been charged with a crime, as Morden has not been. When Vir counters with the question as to why then he is being held, Sheridan fobs him off and leaves. But now the captain’s suspicions are confirmed, and he is even more fired up to find out who this guy is that, although he seems innocuous, is able to carry such influence with the Centauri that they will extend their protection to him?

Ivanova tells him she is worried that he is becoming irrational, and it is her duty to advise him that he may not be fit for duty, but he blows her off too. He tries to get Talia to scan Morden but she is prohibited from unauthorised scans. Sheridan’s contention that legally the man is dead and can’t object holds no weight with her: she knows he is playing word games, and dangerous ones. But he has a plan. He makes sure that the two pass each other in the corridor as Morden is being transferred to a cell, and the telepathic emanations from him are so overpowering that she automatically scans him. What she sees terrifies her: darkness, total and absolute. And cold. So cold. She also sees what look to be creatures, about half man height and spider or antlike, clustered around him.

Eventually, even Delenn and Kosh meet with Sheridan and tell him he must release Morden. When he refuses, they agree to tell him what they know, but warn him he will have trouble sleeping once he knows what they know. They tell him of the ancient race called The First Ones, who watched over and guided the “younger races” but then went away, far from our galaxy. Sheridan thinks he’s listening to folklore, fairytales, but Delenn tells him this is history, not fantasy. Ancient, godlike beings once raomed the galaxy and they battled a darker race known as the Shadows. They were only defeated by an alliance of races a thousand years ago, in which the First Ones fought. Kosh was one of those First Ones.

He shows Sheridan what happened to the Icarus. They landed on and explored Zha’dum, and there they found the Shadows, who killed them rather than let them escape and carry news of their presence to the outside world. Delenn tells Sheridan that unless Morden is released the Shadows will come for him, and will realise how much their enemy knows about them. Then they will strike, before Delenn and Kosh are ready. In order to have any chance of defeating the Shadows this time, Delenn needs as much time as possible to marshall her forces. If she is compelled to act too soon, she and Kosh will have to play their hand, and at the moment it is a losing one. They are not yet ready to face the ancient enemy. Faced with this dilemma, Sheridan sees he has no option but to let Morden go, even though he now burns even more to know what happened to his wife, and is sure the man in the isolation cell knows. Before he does though he manages to tune the station’s scanners to a frequency that shows him the strange creatures Talia also saw, standing alongside Morden, as if protecting or guarding him. The Shadows Delenn spoke of. She warned him that Morden is never alone, and now he can see for himself. Torn, wanting to shout and point and draw attention to the grainy image on the monitor, he resists and lets it fade, mindful of Delenn’s prophecy, that if they move too soon they will lose, and billions will die.

When Morden has been released Sheridan goes to Garibaldi to apologise for not listening to him and asks him to take back his job, which he does. Then the captain goes to see Kosh, and asks him to help him learn how to fight the Shadows. Kosh says he will, but has a dire prediction for Sheridan. Given the Vorlon’s usual couching of subtle phrase and riddle, this one is straightforward and unambiguous: if he goes to Zha’dum, as he tells Kosh he will, he is going to die.

QUOTES
Morden: “If restoring the Centauri Republic means nothing to you, what does? What do you want?”
Vir: “I’d like to live just long enough to be there when they cut off your head and stick it on a pike, as a warning to the next ten generations that some favours come with too high a price. I would look up into your lifeless eyes and wave, like this. Can you and your associates arrange that for me, Mr. Morden?”
(Hold that thought...)

Franklin: “When a patient starts to slip away and he looks at you, his eyes grab hold of you the way a drowning man grabs hold of anything to keep from sinking. Afraid, so afraid. Then just at the last it’s as if they look past you to something else and the look on their face is like nothing you can describe. And then just as they look past you, the moment they look past you you can’t help but meet their gaze, and just for an instant you see God reflected in their eyes. Seen a lot of reflected gods today, Susan, and I’m wondering how we can keep believing in them when they’ve stopped believing in us.”

Sheridan: “Mister Garibaldi: interpreting the regulations for a senior officer can be considered an act of insubordination!”
(This is an amazingly clever line and a real nod back to season one, when Colonel Ari Ben Zayn said the same thing, word for word, to Sinclair. It shows that Sheridan is beginning to lose sight of his responsibilities as the station commander, and letting his personal feelings guide his decisions, even if they lead him down dark paths. That is a dangerous and slippery slope to begin to slide down.)

Delenn: “If this is the only way then we will give you those answers. But be warned: once you know his secret, once you know what we have known for the last three years, you will never sleep well again. Come, Captain: the greatest nightmare of our time is waiting for you.”

Delenn: “We have no other name for them. The Shadows were old when even the Ancients were young. They battled one another over and over, across a million years. The last great war was ten thousand years ago, it was the last time the Ancients walked among us. But the Shadows were only defeated, not destroyed. A thousand years ago the Shadows returned to their places of power, rebuilt them, began to stretch forth their hand. Before they could strike they were defeated by an alliance of worlds, including the Minbari, and a few remaining First Ones who had not yet passed beyond the Veil. When they had finished, the First Ones went away, all but one.”
Sheridan: “There’s still one of them left? Where?”
Delenn (indicates Kosh): “That is why Kosh can never leave his encounter suit. He would be recognised.”
Sheridan: “Recognised? By whom?”
Kosh: “Everyone.”
Delenn: “There comes a moment when each of us must pledge ourselves to something greater. You once told G’Kar that he had to choose between revenge and the good of his people. Now you must make that decision. It will be the most important decision of your life.”

Sheridan: “Stop!”
Zack: “What did you see?”
Sheridan: “Nothing. Shadows…”

Garibaldi: “What’s that?” (Pointing at Zack’s Nightwatch armband)
Zack: “What? Ah, nothin’. If Earth wants to throw its money around who I am to say no, huh? Fifty extra credits a week to walk around and do what I do anyway? Jeez! Why not?”
(But Zack, and everyone else who is so keen to take Earthgov's money for seemingly nothing, will find that there is a very dark and high price to pay for the allegiance they offer when they put on that seemingly innocuous armband).

Sheridan: “I let him go. But there’s a price tag attached. You’ve been help me so we can understand each other, I don’t want that anymore. I want you to teach me about them, how to fight them, how to beat them. Because sooner or later, I’m going to Zha’dum and I’m going to stop them.”
Kosh: “If you go to Zha’dum you will die.”
Sheridan: “Then I die. But I will not go down easily and I will not go down alone. You will teach me?”
Kosh: “Yes.”

Important Plot Arc Points
Morden
Arc Level: Red
This episode is piled high with revelations and plot twists, and now we know a lot more about the mysterious Mr. Morden than we did previously. He serves ancient, evil beings known only as the Shadows, who are timeless and immortal it would seem, and were only defeated a thousand years ago thanks to the intervention of other ancient aliens, which Delenn calls The First Ones. Morden is not alone; the Shadows follow him, cluster about him, invisible to the human eye, or any other, but they are always there. We’ve seen them before, in “Signs and portents”, when he gloated with them over having secured the services of Mollari, and we also see them here before Delenn and Kosh reveal who they are, when Talia scans Morden. We also learn that Morden was on the Icarus, the ship that carried Sheridan’s wife to her death, along with everyone else onboard. But though that was written off as an unexplained accident, it now seems it was a cold act of callous murder. The Icarus landed on Zha’dum, the ancient base used by the Shadows, and all its crew were killed, other than of course Morden.

There is of course a lot we still don’t know about him, may never do, but according to Earth Central he is dead, and if he’s serving the Shadows against his own people then he probably is dead, inside at least. Perhaps he was to be killed too, and at the last offered his services to the aliens like a true snivelling coward, turning traitor on his own people in return for his miserable life. Or maybe they forced him to work for them? The perpetual smile, that smirk that is always on his face, would say otherwise though: he seems quite willing and even happy to be their servant, knowing nobody can or would dare touch him, even if they don’t quite know why. One thing is certain: he will never turn Vir the way he has turned Londo. Vir makes this clear when he tells Morden very candidly and graphically what he wants. Remember this when we get into season five.

The Shadows
Arc Level: Red
Now at last we know who the “dark enemy” Delenn spoke of before she underwent her transformation is. An ancient race who have battled with another, across the millennia, and who were only defeated last time by an alliance of races. We see a scene, taken from season one’s closer, where Delenn asks Lennier if he related her message to Kosh, and the aide replies yes, and that the answer Kosh gave was in the affirmative. A lot has hung on what that question was, and now we learn it was “Have the Shadows returned to Zha’dum?” Now that Delenn knows they have, that the ancient enemy is consolidating and gathering its forces, she knows there is no time to waste. She cannot wait for approval from the Grey Council which, if it came at all, would only come after days or weeks of heated debate. She goes ahead and makes an enemy of herself to many powerful Minbari.

But it was necessary. Without her change, Delenn would not have been able to see as the humans do, and be able to guide Sheridan towards the revelation that she and Kosh make here. Of course, it’s still too early. She had not intended the captain to learn this information so soon, but with Morden imprisoned and the Shadows getting more agitated, she has to move sooner than she expected. Now the secret is out, and Sheridan must deal with it. We can also see now the true extent of the dark, cold star Londo has hitched his wagon to. This association with Morden and the Shadows --- though he does not know about the latter, and yet he must have some idea that the enigmatic man has powerful allies --- will bring Mollari and the Centauri Republic into direct confrontation with Sheridan and his people, as the two clash head-on. It may be that Londo will find that he has after all backed the wrong horse, and should have listened to Vir.

Zha’dum
Arc Level: Red
The ancient homebase of the Shadows, this planet has been hinted at by the likes of G’Kar and even Catherine Sakai in season one, and is noted in the video report of the “crash” of the Icarus. But now we know its significance, and it seems that Sheridan had better stay away from this dark place, as Kosh has warned him that death awaits him there, and for the Vorlon to be so literal and unenigmatic, he must be telling the truth, and an important truth at that. Only one problem: John Sheridan intends to go there, even knowing the fate he must encounter there.

Zack Rising
We can see Zack come into his own in this episode. Even before Garibaldi temporarily resigns in protest at the illegal imprisonment of Morden, Zack is in the episode from the very start. It’s he who passes Morden in, he who stops him and he who brings him to the captain. When he has to take over for Garibaldi he makes it clear that he is concerned about the chief’s sudden leave of absence, as Sheridan does not tell him the whole story, and you can see he considers Garibaldi a friend, and is uncomfortable taking his job, even if only for a short while.

But we also see him get involved with the newly formed Nightwatch. This seemingly innocuous entity will soon turn out to be anything but. As it is, Zack sneered at the idea but when the extra money was mentioned he figured why not? He thinks he’s making easy money. But membership in the Nightwatch will very shortly show itself to be anything but easy, and the money will be the least of his worries. The captain also takes him into his confidence, telling him the old story about Coventry during World War II, and even Zack is taken aback by Sheridan’s duplicity when he arranges for Morden and Talia’s paths to cross. It’s clear he’s a man of principles, which while it will stand him in good stead on Babylon 5 and with Sheridan, will be more of a liability when it comes to dealing with the Ministry of Peace’s new pet project.


Good guys sometimes wear black
One of the strengths of Babylon 5, only copied really by Deep Space Nine and later Battlestar Galactica and its ilk, is that the heroes are not squeaky-clean. Like Sisko in DS9, they sometimes resort to questionable tactics in order to get the job done. In my opinion, this makes the series more genuine, more honest and more real. The point being that sometimes the choices they make are shocking, and often can’t really be excused. In this section I’ll be detailing scenes and events when the characters make that sudden left turn, surprising us that they can play the dark card when needed.

Here Sheridan arrests Morden without any cause at all, holds him without charge and even goes so far as to gloat that since technically he is dead he has no rights, and Sheridan can do what he likes with him. This interrogation of his will uncomfortably parallel another, later in season four, when we will have to ask ourselves is this guy just doing his job, is he evil or is he trying to achieve an end, no matter the means? Nixon once famously said, “when the president does it it’s no longer illegal.” That was and is bullshit of course, but scenes like this one, and others later, make us wonder if Sheridan and his comrades do really make up the rules as they go along, or just obey them or work within them when it suits them. Are they really the good guys, or just different sides of the same coin? In the end he pulls back from the brink, but not because he realises what he’s doing is wrong. In fact, the choice has to be spelled out for him, and linked back to the same one he gave G’Kar when he wanted to kill Mollari earlier. It’s only expediency and the greater good that stops Sheridan from finishing what he started, so in many ways you can’t really give him too many points for that. Perhaps the only thing in this instance in which you can praise him is the fact that he manages to see the Shadows, sees that what Delenn and Kosh have told him is real, and decides to keep quiet about it, keeping their secret.

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begins tomorrow!
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(Even Mister Worf is happy!)
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“Space, the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Enterprise. Her five year mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilisations. To boldy go where no man has gone before!”

With these words, not just a television series but a true phenomenon began. The Star Trek franchise is now worth billions of dollars worldwide, and has spawned four sequels and to date twelve Hollywood movies, as well as countless other tie-ins and spinoffs. The first real television franchise, Star trek is shown somewhere in the world almost every minute, and there can be few people who have not seen at least one of its incarnations. Even for those who have never experienced it, the words “Kirk”, “Spock” and “Enterprise” all have meaning, and all relate to the programme that redefined television drama, and almost single-handedly gave birth to the era of television science-fiction.
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(Gene Roddenberry: the man who started it all)
Before Star Trek, TV was simple: the good guys chased the bad guys, caught them and said something pithy while smiling into the camera. That’s overgeneralising of course, but essentially that was the tried and trusted formula for TV, and it worked whether you had a cop show, a cowboy show, a comedy show or any other sort of show. It was a template, and with a very few exceptions writers wrote within that framework. Then came Star Trek. Rather than just be a chasing-aliens-and-space battles (which was surely not only envisioned but expected by executives when it was pitched to them), this series would take on the issues of the day, make political and social comment and attract far more than the expected geeky teenager audience, with its adherents eventually being academics, teachers, scientists and even astronauts.

Star Trek has become so deeply ingrained in the consciousness of the world that it is now not at all unusual for people to have their first kiss to it, conceive their first child to it, even name the child after a character in it. Weddings can now be full Starfleet affairs, and where this sort of thing would be, and was, looked on as at best weird and at worst sad, these days it is almost acceptable. The poor maligned Trekkies and Trekkers may not quite outnumber the “norms”, but we’re getting there. Star Trek conventions are big business, the actors all get great jobs with voiceovers and sponsorship, and many have received honorary doctorates when, really, they wouldn’t know one end of a microscope from another. But it’s not for what they know that these people have been honoured, it’s for what they were a part of, how Star Trek changed the lives of more people than anyone will ever know. Many Apollo astronauts have cited the programme as a reason they wanted to go into space, while cults and even religions have grown up around the franchise.
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(A "typical" Star Trek wedding)
I personally would consider myself a semi-hardcore Trekker. I’ve only been to one convention (and that wasn’t anything like I expected) and I don’t own a uniform (at least, not a Star Trek one! ;)) but I have watched all series (bar Enterprise) and can tell you most of what happens in every episode. I can argue the merits and failings of the Borg, Quark’s bar, Data’s approach to Shakespeare, or any other aspect you wish. I don’t go giving people the Vulcan salute (but I can do it: just) but I do often recall episodes or events in the series that I can use to parallel my own life. I’m certainly not a casual fan, but neither have I built Starfleet Academy in my back garden.

So here I’d like to take the month to look deeply into this amazing creation of one man --- or as deeply as I can in four weeks --- and try to give you a flavour of what it’s all about. I’ll be looking at episodes from all four main series as well as some of the movies, with articles on various aspects of the show and features on characters. If you haven’t seen the show before this could be a great introduction for you, and don’t be afraid to shout if you have questions.

But mostly I hope just to have fun here for the next month, exploring what it is that makes this originally only three-season, seventy-nine episode series such an enduring phenomenon, and why even now, nearly fifty years after its creation, it still has the power to enthrall, thrill and engage us. I should point out that, like everything in The Couch Potato, spoilers will abound, so if you’re getting into the series for the first time, be warned as there are major plot revelations all through these articles. There’s no point in my spoilering them, as it would just be impossible, so think carefully before you proceed. I don’t want to be held responsible for anyone’s disappointment later on.

Do be aware I am not covering the so-far most recent series, Enterprise, later Star Trek: Enterprise, for a range of reasons. Mostly because I didn't watch it all --- about half a season I think --- and what I did see gave me no hope it would get any better. I was bored by it, and while I can wax critical about Voyager, and it had some awful episodes, I can't ever really say it bored me on the same consistent level that Enterprise did. I didn't engage with any of the characters, least of all the captain, and I couldn't pick out one --- unlike the Doctor in Voyager --- who could have saved the series for me.

So, to all intents and purposes, although I of course know of it and wouldn't attempt to deny its existence, Enterprise is not a stop on our month-long journey. If you are a big fan and would like to write about it, drop me a line and I'll see what we can arrange. Otherwise, don't expect to see it covered here. It may be mentioned the odd time, but that will be about it. I apologise if you think it was a great series, but if so, then write about it for me here and try to show me how wrong I am. If not, then please just accept it will not be part of these proceedings.

So come with me now, as we beam aboard and begin our journey. Later on, we’ll rendezvous with the USS Nerdtopia as she begins her long mission to review that list of science-fiction movies I posted some time ago, but for now, let’s start off with the smaller screen, and nowhere better or more appropriate to begin than with the very first ever episode.

Ahead, warp factor five. Steady as she goes!
Welcome to
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(Note: In the light of the recent tragic death of Leonard Nimoy I wrestled briefly with the idea of either delaying this special, or even cancelling it altogether, but I came very quickly to the realisation that, as Spock himself said, the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, and some of you have been waiting for this. Well, that guy down there has, he told me so. Also, if I can allow myself some incredible self-indulgence, I’d like to think that if he’s looking down on us now, Leonard would want us to go on, and celebrate his life and his work rather than mourn his death. In the final analysis, and to be completely Vulcan about it, it’s surely the logical thing to do.)

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The Star Trek that hit television screens in February 1965 was not the first episode of the series made, that one actually not being aired till twenty years later, because at the time the network believed it was too beyond the limited attention span of the then-television audience to grasp and understand, or, as they put it succinctly, “too cerebral”. The original pilot was rejected and Gene Roddenberry had to go back and rethink, coming up with what would be the “proper” pilot to launch the series that would eventually become a worldwide phenomenon and lead to a global super-franchise the likes of which the world had literally never seen before. Star Trek was probably the first true “brand”, spawning everything from movies to lunchboxes and stickers to novels.

But as every true Trekker knows, “The Cage” is where it's at. It's the original, double-length pilot episode and it is so far removed from what the series would later become, and yet retains some elements of the future programme, that it really does deserve to be reviewed first. For those who are unaware, this original pilot featured: no Kirk (gasp!) no Scotty (double gasp!) no McCoy (triple gasp!) and no Spock (all gasped out now!) --- well, it did actually feature Spock, but a far different one to the classic character who would emerge as one of the series's, and science-fiction's as a whole, most enduring, respected and recognised characters.

Original Pilot: “The Cage”

The USS Enterprise investigates an old radio signal which seems to indicate that a ship, the SS Columbia went down in the Talos system. Or rather, it doesn't. Its captain, Christopher Pike, seems unconvinced that there could still be survivors down there after eighteen years, and is more concerned with completing his own mission. He tells Science Officer Spock to ignore it and continue on. The Captain is brooding about a recent mission in which some of his crew were killed, others injured, and they are now en route to the Vega colony to seek medical aid for those hurt. He is beginning to doubt his ability to command, and the burden of decision is weighing heavily on his shoulders. He is considering resigning his commission.

However just as he is discussing his options with the ship's doctor, Spock advises him that they have intercepted a follow-up message which confirms there are survivors on Talos IV, and he is now duty-bound to investigate. They set course for the planet. Once there, they do indeed come across a bunch of survivors, who just happen to have in their number a nubile sexy female, Vina, who leads Pike off on his own, whereupon it becomes clear that everything is an illusion as she and the “survivors” disappear, the rock face opens and from a door set into it emerge three alien beings with bulbous heads. One shoots Pike with a ray of some sort, and before his crew can get to him he is pulled inside the structure. The door remains stubbornly resistant to the phaser blasts the crew direct at it. Spock calls in to advise the ship that they have lost the captain.

Inside, Pike awakes to find he is inside some underground structure and trapped in (say it with me) a cage. He charges the transparent window but it rebuffs him as if it were made of the strongest steel. The three aliens who captured him now appear and communicate with each other telepathically, as they discuss him, and talk about beginning “the experiment” soon. Back on the ship, and against Spock's better judgement, the female Number One agrees to try blasting the rockface with the ship's phasers. In a move that would become typical of later episodes, and series, the aliens manipulate Pike's mind to create a scene out of his memory --- the one about which he was agonising on the ship, in which some crew were killed --- and provide a female for him to rescue, pitting him against an implacable enemy. Whatever else he is, Pike is not an idiot and realises it's a construct taken from his mind, but the human survival imperative is so strong that he finds himself fighting, both to protect the girl (who was missing from his original mission) and himself. After all, he doesn't know how real this could get, or how far his captors are willing to go.

When the simulation ends though, with Pike victorious, the woman is suddenly in the cage with him. She eyes the Talosians a moment before they depart, and then she tries to seduce Pike, saying she can be anyone or anything he wants, but he rebuffs her advances, trying instead to gain some information about his captors. The first obligation of a prisoner is to seduce the woman he's imprisoned with ... oh, sorry. Was reading from the wrong book there. How did Captain Kirk's Guide to Alien Babesl get here? Sorry. I meant of course the obligation is to escape, and this is what he is trying to do.

Oddly enough, Number One and Spock have, instead of using the ship's phasers from space, transported down a large heavy weapon which they have set up outside the door through which Pike was abducted. Naturally, they have as little success here as they had with their hand weapons. Vina explains that the Talosians used to live on the surface of the planet but that war drove them underground and the surface is only now becoming habitable. They search the galaxy for specimens and lure them here, probe their minds and seem to be interested in procreation (ain't we all?) but suddenly she starts screaming and vanishes. Pike discovers that strong emotion can overpower or block out the Talosians' control of him, as they tell him that the girl who shared his cage is real, the only survivor of the ship whose distress call they picked up. Again the Talosians create a scene from Pike's mind, this time an idyllic fantasy of his dream of retiring, then they change the scenario and she's an Orion slave girl.

Meanwhile, the landing party from the Enterprise finds that only the two women --- a yeoman and Number One --- are allowed transport down, and these two find themselves in the cage with Pike. The Talosians now tell him he has a choice of three women to breed with, including the original one. Pike fills his mind with dark images but still can't break out of the cage. On the Enterprise Spock prepares to leave but finds that all power appears to have failed, and they are going nowhere. When Pike manages to get the drop on one of the Talosians he is told that they will destroy the Enterprise if he does not let him go, but he gambles that “you're too intelligent to kill for no reason”, and indeed the scientific nature of the beings is proven to triumph, as they allow, under duress, Pike to see that the “hand-lasers” not working was just an illusion: a hole has been blasted in the wall after all. They head out.

Once on the surface of the planet they are told that the Talosians wish them to begin reclaiming the planet, Pike fathering a race who will exist to serve the aliens and make the planet a home for them again. The captain bargains with their captor: send his two crewmembers back to the ship, and assure its safety, and he will remain behind with Vina. But Number One has other ideas, and sets her phaser to overload, willing to kill them all rather than be part of bringing up a race of slave humans. When the Talosians assimilate the records of the Enterprise and learn of humanity's hatred for captivity they decide that they are unsuitable for their purposes, and allow the humans to leave.

Vina, however, is condemned to remain on the planet; her beauty is an illusion. The Talosians reconstructed her from the crash, but had no model to go from and so she is, shall we say, less than pretty? If she leaves, the illusion will be broken. The Talosians allow her to regain her beauty through the illusion, and also give her an illusory Pike to spend her days with. The crew leave the planet and head off into space. And back to the dole. ;)

QUOTES
Doctor: “You're tired.”
Pike: “You bet I'm tired! I'm tired of being responsible for 203 lives, tired of deciding which mission is too risky and which isn't, and who goes on a landing party, and who lives and who dies.”

Pike: “Now you're beginning to sound more like a doctor, bartender.”
Doctor: “We both get the same sort of customers, the living and the dying.”

Pike: “She does a good enough job, it's just that I can't get used to a woman on the bridge. Oh, sorry Lieutenant!” (Looking at his Number One, who arches her eyebrow coldly. “You're different, of course!”

Survivor: “This is Vina. Her parents are dead. She was born almost as we crashed.”
(That must have been a tough childbirth!)

Alien I: “It appears, Magistrate, that the specimen's intelligence is shockingly limited”
Magistrate: “This is no surprise, as its vessel was baited here so easily with a simple simulated message. As you can read in its thoughts, it is only now beginning to realise that the survivors' encampment was a simple illusion that we placed in their minds.”

Vina: “When dreams become more important than reality, you give up travelling, building, creating, you even forget how to operate the machines left behind by your ancestors.”

Vina: “He doesn't need you. He's already chosen me.”
Yeoman: “Chosen her? For what? I don't understand!”
Vina: “Now there's a fine choice for intelligent offspring!”
Yeoman: “Offspring? As in children?”
Number One: “Offspring, as in, he's Adam? Is that it?”
Vina: “You're no better choice. They'd have more luck crossing him with a computer!”

Yeoman: “Sir? I was just wondering, just curious: who would have been Eve?”

Ch-ch-ch-changes
Well, obviously. This episode doesn't really tie in with the rest of the Star Trek canon, though it would be revisited in the first season for an episode that would tie up the loose ends and bring Pike back, albeit much older and played by another actor. But there are so many changes here that occurred between this episode and the next, the true pilot for the series, that it's almost self-defeating to list them. Among the important ones though are:

Pike was replaced of course by Kirk.

Spock was played and written in a far less excitable manner (yeah, seriously: you want to see Spock as you've never seen him before? Check this episode out!) and made much cooler and logical. He was also made Kirk's second in command.

None of the crew apart from Spock (and to some degree Number One, though in a different role) survive the pilot and are completely rewritten and recast for the next episode. I don't mean they die: nobody does, but they are considered surplus to requirements and all kicked off the show. How they must feel like the guy who left the Beatles, or the guy who refused to sign The Rolling Stones!

The red alert sound was fixed; here it sounds like a mouse laughing.

The crew complement began at 203 but eventually settled at around 450.

The word “phaser” has yet to be coined: here, the weapons are “hand lasers”.

The main propulsion is called “hyperdrive”, with the factor called “time warp” (don't! Just don't, okay?) and the backup system, rather than being impulse power as it would soon come to be known as, is simply referred to as “rockets”. :rolleyes:

Some things never change
There are those facets of the show however which were carried forward. Though Roddenberry would struggle for several episodes --- almost right through the first season, in fact --- to decide what to call headquarters (from “Space Command” to “Star Control” and so on, till he eventually settled on “Starfleet Command”) he had the idea of “M” class planets here, a planet with a breathable atmosphere, though that may have come from astrophysics, I don't know. But it is a designation that was carried not only through Star Trek, but the rest of the franchise over the decades.

Interestingly, the word “Engage!” is used for the first time here, and would not be uttered again for another thirty years. When Kirk ordered a course, he just said “Ahead, Warp Factor 5” or whatever. It wasn't until Picard arrived in Star Trek: The Next Generation that he began using the phrase to execute the command. I wonder why they initially dropped it, when it later became so popular? Perhaps Roddenberry was anxious to sever as many ties with the original, rejected pilot as possible.

Even in this first episode, they used the term “landing party” to refer to a group of the crew who would transport down to a planet and explore.

Aliens!
Yes, the Trek universe was chock-full of them. You couldn't move without bumping into an Andorian or annoying a Klingon, and that spot of light on the wall could be a malevolent intelligence from a far distant galaxy. Here, there's a mixture of decent and quite crappy aliens.

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Talosians: The aliens who lured the Enterprise here, and who capture and experiment on Pike, are good for the time. They're much taller than humans, have large heads somewhat akin to lightbulbs and their gigantic brains are laced with a tracery of veins which can be seen from the outside. They also communicate telepathically, something which I think was a first for science-fiction, at least on TV, and they have such low regard for Pike that they view him as something less than a lab rat. They're cleverly made up too, that their flowing robes cover their feet and so when they move they seem almost to glide.

(um, never named I think?): The enemy Pike faces in the dreamworld, however, is pathetic, nothing more than a tall man with a beard and some blacked-out teeth. Oooh! Scary!

Reasons not to be cheerful!
So why did the pilot fail? What was it that led to the network rejecting it, and what was it in the second one that caught their interest? You'd have to say that a lot of it lies in the characterisation, or I should say, lack of it. The main thing here is that you can't really care about anyone, from the captain down to the annoying “Happy Days”-like navigator. Nobody interacts with anyone. Nobody seems to be related or have anything to do with anyone. Number One is cold, almost mannish, obviously fiercely defending what we can assume to be the first, perhaps only, position of second-in-command on a starship, if what Pike says is true. The Doctor seems more interested in getting the captain drunk, and even Spock is hard to care about, though you can see his leadership qualities beginning to surface even this early.

And what of Pike? He plays the role so straight-laced, so lantern-jawed and with a constant scowl of derision on his face that you sort of hope he gets killed. There's nothing attractive about him: oh, as a man I guess he's handsome and strong, but there's no ... charisma about him. It's hard to believe that this is a man whom others would follow into battle, and his self-doubt about his own position does nothing to endear him to us, unlike Benjamin Sisko in the pilot of “Star Trek: Deep Space 9” decades later. He never smiles, he never relaxes, he never seems to be “off”. His commands are given with an almost scathing authority, like a sergeant major, whereas when Kirk, later, commands, it always seems like his crew are happy to oblige. It's their job, their duty, yes, but they always seem like it's no trouble and there's no resentment there. Pike, to me, does not carry the mantle of authority on his shoulders in the same easy, affable way that Shatner as Kirk would later. Even when Vina vanishes, screaming of being punished, his eyes betray barely a flicker of emotion. He doesn't shout “Leave her alone! Take me!” as we know Jim Kirk would in his place. To be honest, the only time we see him show any genuine emotion is when the Talosians punish him, making him feel like he is on fire.

But it's not just the cast, though they really are not up to this task at all. The story, too, is a little hard to follow, or would have been, for audiences spoonfed on the likes of I love Lucy, Dragnet and The High Chapperal, series that really required little or no thought, and in which everything that needed to be explained was explained. If Little Joe went off the Ponderosa to track down Indians, you knew what he was doing. If Lucy got in an argument with a traffic cop, it was simple and straightforward. But here, not only does Roddenberry begin in the middle, as it were --- the Enterprise is supposedly heading home after a disastrous mission --- he spends no time introducing the characters, even naming many of them, and expects us to know who they are. Who is the guy in the Happy Days hair? Who is the doctor? Nobody knows. Or, indeed, cares.

Then he brings in the idea of telepathy and humans being used as experimental animals. It would have been a hard concept for the American television audiences of the sixties to grasp, and though he tries to explain it through Pike, Jeffrey Hunter just does not possess the screen magnetism to make people listen to him. Though he's the central character, most of the time he seems to be almost muttering to himself, and his facial expressions don't help; this is not the face of a man you really want to listen to, much less trust. He's also way too All-American-Blue-Eyed-Boy. When the girl offers to “become anything, be anyone” he wants, he stands there, jaw jutting out so far you could build a pier on it, eyes steely and straight, rejecting the idea out of hand. He doesn't even consider it. What man would not, if even for a moment, waver in the face of such fantasy? But Pike is untouchable, unreachable, cold and hard and unflinching, and he is not as other men. Now, put Kirk in that situation...

Look at Spock too. When he realises there is no way to get down to the planet, does he put that superior Vulcan mind into overdrive? No. He decides to bail on the captain and first officer, and tries to run. He rationalises it as “the safety of this ship is paramount”, but isn't this a case of “the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few”? Yeah, but Spock, the Spock we came to know, would never abandon his captain, at least, not without a plan to return and save him. Again, Spock gives no indication that he has any friendship with Pike, that he cares about him any more than any other member of the crew. And if these people don't care for each other, how can we be expected to care for them? This is something Roddenberry addresses quickly in the “re-pilot”: from the off, we see not crewmembers but friends, not subordinates but comrades. Kirk genuinely cares for his crew, and they respect and admire him. Pike? He can just fuck off: nobody cares, including me.

Oops!
Even after the failure of the first pilot, fame could have been Jeffrey Hunter's for the taking. I personally think his wooden acting in this pilot should have precluded him from any future episodes, but it turns out that he was required to reprise the role should the network pick up the series. As they rejected it though, he was not expected to take the role in the second, more successful pilot which led to the series being taken up. Although Roddenberry was said to have no animosity towards Hunter, the wife of the man who could have been Kirk seems to have been the main obstacle standing in his way, declaring haughtily “Jeffrey Hunter is a film actor: he does not do television!” Stupid bint by that single statement deprived her husband of what could have been, in effect, immortality. Who does not, after all, recognise the name James Kirk?

But Hunter stuck to his guns and, even though he went against his wife's wishes a year later and wrote a pilot for another thriller series which the network passed on, he ended up with parts in mostly foreign B-movies, and he died in 1969, just as the series he had initially helped to get off the ground, if stumblingly, was beginning to find its space legs. It's ironic that, had he sat for the second pilot, it too may have been rejected and Star Trek never been, as I really feel that much of the antipathy directed towards the pilot was down to his mechanical, deadpan acting, something that belonged more in the Flash Gordon and Buck Rogers morning television serials of the thirties, as well as perhaps western series and some detective ones. Emotion was what eventually brought Star Trek to life and allowed it to stand out from its peers, and become the colossus it did. Jeffrey Hunter was not to be part of that, and though we can feel sorry for him for having missed what was literally a once in a lifetime opportunity, I personally can't say I'm sorry, as I felt he brought nothing to the role.

In what could have been a blunder of monumental proportions, the network advised Roddenberry to “get rid of the guy with the ears”, little realising that it would be Spock who would come to crystallise the idea of Star Trek and represent the series, as Nimoy grew into his rewritten role and became not only the new captain's indispensable right-hand man, but also his fast friend. Star Trek without Spock would have been good, but with the Vulcan it was great and destined to become a true classic.

Messages
One of the core differences between Star Trek and other series at the time was Roddenberry's intent of delivering important social and political messages through the medium of his show. Although his view of the future turned out to be a little too Utopian, too rose-tinged for reality --- as later partially addressed by its successor series, The Next Generation and more widely by its descendant, Deep Space 9 --- he did channel some important messages, such as the need to resist tyrants, the importance of keeping one's integrity and a basic compassion for all life, no matter its race or colour.

Which makes it all the stranger that here, it is the reliance on strong, brutal, primitive emotions that proves to be the one weapon the Talosians cannot control. When Pike fills his mind with images of hate, murder, anger, he can block the telepathic influence of his captors. This leads, to me anyway, to an uncomfortable conclusion: that the more primitive emotions are what make man unique and help him survive, and there's no doubting that: timid cavemen did not last long. But in this enlightened future (I believe no time is specified, but we know from later episodes that the series takes place in the 22nd century) you would expect such imperatives to be less, not more important. As a matter of fact, Roddenberry and his writers would address this, or I should say redress it, in season three's Day of the dove, where a malevolent alien intelligence, intent on pitting the humans against their enemies and each other, finds itself defeated by ... laughter.

That's more like it.

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What makes a good series? Decent writing, good plots, good dialogue, yes all of these. But if you don't have characters people can engage with then you may as well call it a day, as the original pilot for TOS found out. Here I'll be dipping into the series (all four) and sketching a brief outline of characters, some major, some minor, but all integral to the success of each show and the franchise as a whole.

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Name: Worf, son of Mogh
Race: Klingon
Born: Quo’nos
Assignment: NCC-1701D as Security and Tactical Chief, then Deep Space 9 as Chief of Operations and later Executive Officer of the Defiant.
Marital status: Widowed
Family: Mogh (Father, deceased), Sergey Rozhenko (Foster father), Helena Rozhenko (Foster mother), Kurn (brother), K’Ehleyr (Mate, deceased), Alexander (son), Jadzia Dax (Wife, deceased)
Important episodes: (TNG) Heart of glory, The emissary, Birthright, Sins of the father, Redemption, Reunion, Rightful heir (DS9) The Way of the Warrior, The sword of Kahless, Sons of Mogh, Broken link, Apocalypse rising, Favor the bold, Sacrifice of angels, Looking for par’Mach in all the wrong places, You are cordially invited…, Change of heart, Tears of the Prophets, Shadows and symbols, Tacking into the wind

After his parents were killed in the Romulan attack on the Khitomer outpost, Worf was taken in by a human Starfleet officer and his wife, who treated him as their own child and brought him up on their home planet. As they were human, Worf learned a lot about the race and when it came time to choose his career decided to enlist in Starfleet, as a way of repaying the agency by which his life had been saved. In this, he was making history, as no Klingon had ever, or has ever since, served in Starfleet. This would however put him on something of a collision course with his own people, for although Sarek opposed Spock’s joining Starfleet, and made no bones about letting his son know of his displeasure, Worf’s father was dead and his foster father supported his decision. However, to the rest of his kind he was the closest thing to a traitor, or at least not fit to be among them, serving with the race against whom the Klingons had struggled for over seventy years.

Worf begins his tour of duty on Captain Picard’s USS Enterprise, where he is the tactical officer, but on the death of Lieutenant Tasha Yar in “Skin of evil” he is promoted to Security Chief, a post he holds until he is transferred to Deep Space 9, initially temporarily but the posting turns out to be permanent. Worf has romantic liaisons on the Enterprise, firstly with his mate, K’Ehleyr, with whom he had fathered their son, Alexander, and later with Deanna Troi after K’Ehleyr’s death. When he is injured and paralysed, he asks Deanna to look after his son, intending to take his own life. After he survives an experimental procedure that completely restores his health (yawn!) he becomes romantically involved with Deanna, realising he has feelings for her. He requests Riker’s permission to court her, believing that anything else would be dishonourable to him, his friend and Deanna. He ends this relationship when he is reassigned.

Worf often finds it hard to fit in, being dour and unsmiling as a Klingon and finding human humour, like Data, hard to comprehend and thus to join in with. He is befriended by Guinan, the ship’s bartender, who introduces him to prune juice, a beverage he consumes for the rest of his life, and tries to make him laugh. She’s very annoying. On Deep Space 9 he meets Jadzia Dax, who quickly becomes his next conquest (“She is glorious!”) and in fact puts her before his duty later, when her life is in danger and to save her he must abandon his mission. Defending his father’s honour when Mogh is accused of being a traitor, Worf accepts “discommodation” to preserve the empire. This means that he is shunned by every Klingon; even his own brother must turn his back on him. Some time later he is able to redress the situation and is accepted back into the fold. He eventually leaves Starfleet, taking up his new position as Federation ambassador to Quo’nos.

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Being a science-fiction and space exploration series, Star Trek is of course home to many varied and interesting alien races, all of whom have to come from somewhere, so in this section I’ll be giving you the ten-dollar tour of some of the worlds in the Trekverse.
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Name: Ferenginar
Alignment: Neutral
Home to: Ferengi race
Capital City: Ferenginar
Orbital Star: Ventarus Idrilon, M-class

If there is one place in the world where it rains more than in Ireland, it’s the Ferengi homeworld. Torrential rains teem down both night and day, necessitating the building of domes to prevent its inhabitants drowning. The constant lash and patter of rain is a sound so endemic to Ferenginar that those who live there probably don’t even hear it, fading into the background, and when they leave their home planet it must come as something of a shock to see worlds that are dry. The damp, dreary, dismal atmosphere on the planet is pretty much well suited to a people whose lives are rules by figures, profit and loss, calculations and money matters. The Ferengi are a sort of cross between a race of accountants and entrepreneurs, and the miserable weather on Ferenginar is most likely part of the reason many of them leave to seek opportunities beyond their home planet.

The biggest and most imposing and well-known landmark on Ferenginar is The Tower of Commerce. It stands high above any other buildings in the centre of the Sacred Marketplace, and is where all official business is conducted, and also where the ruler of the planet, the Grand Nagus, dispenses financial advice and makes the laws that govern the planet. It is home too to the offices of the Ferengi Commerce Authority, the FCA, who must approve or ban any business venture undertaken by a Ferengi, with the requisite cut for them of course. The Tower has also been used as a place of execution, with offenders taken to the roof and thrown off.

Other landmarks include The Nagal Residence, the palatial home of the Grand Nagus, Mount Tubatuba, a volcano and the Vorp Memorial, a monument to Vorp, one of the planet’s greatest and most tragic innovators. Other than that most of the planet is unremarkable, consisting of mostly swamps, rotting vegetation and rivers of muck. Nice place!

Even the best show ever written is bound to have one or two bad episodes, and with a total of over four hundred episodes between all four series, Star Trek has certainly seen some total turkeys over its run. Here I'll be presenting a few; I had intended originally to make a toplist, but sure I can't tell if "Spirit folk" is worse than "The Omega Factor", or if "Fascination" trumps "Masks" in absurdity and bad writing, so I'll just list them in no order. I will however rate them, the usual one to five, with in this instance five being the worst possible and one being mildly bad. To illustrate this, I'll be using icons of one of the most disliked Star Trek characters ever.
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Title: "Starship mine"
Series: TNG
Season: Six
Writer(s): Morgan Grendel
Main character(s): Picard
Plot: Picard has to go all Die-Hard to save his ship from terrorists. No, really.

There's nothing terribly wrong about this episode, compared to many of the others that will populate this section, but at its heart this is "Die Hard" in space. Well, spacedock. While the rest of the crew are attending a lavish reception (sound familiar?) Picard returns to his ship, which is being decontaminated, and finds that a group of terrorists are using the opportunity to harvest the chemical from the ship's engines to make into bombs and sell to the highest bidder.

Lord preserve us! It's an all-action episode to be sure, but really, it's far below what TNG was capable of and with a few tweaks it could have been on Criminal Minds, NCIS or any other action cop show. It does give Picard a central role, which he did not always have, and a chance to action-hero it up, but the rest of the crew being held hostage while he does his thing is just way too close to every Bruce Willis movie you've ever seen to be forgiven.

It's odd, too, because the episode was written by Morgan Grendel, who penned the superlative "The inner light" for the previous season. Maybe working on Nash Bridges, 21 Jump Street and Law and Order affected him more than he would like to admit!

The episode is marked by the first ever appearance of Tim Russ as one of the terrorists, who would go on to become Tuvok later in VOY. But nobody cares about that.

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Title: “Explorers”
Series: DS9
Season: Three
Writer(s): Rene Echevarria and Hilary J. Bader
Main character(s): Sisko and Jake
Plot: Sisko decides to see if the ancient Bajorans were able to harness the energy of solar wind power to YAWWWNNNN (sorry, sorry) um, sail across the stars.

Yeah, the above says it all really. Wanting to bond with his son, believing they aren’t spending enough time together Sisko works on an exact duplicate of the solar ship the ancient Bajorans apparently used to sail between planets. He wants to see if it’s possible, and Jake, having a brain and something of a life, is reluctant to accompany him. It’s very much a character-driven episode, but whereas these can be really well written and deep, this is, well, not. It’s like that one where Wesley has to spend hours inside a shuttlecraft with Picard, and they get to know each other better. Really, who gives a shit? We want conflict, space battle, aliens, political upheaval, not two boring bastards having a family moment as they drift across space.

Nothing happens in the episode. Literally. Nothing. Whereas they could have been attacked, or discovered a new moon, or contacted some alien lifeform who became interested in their ship (Fuck it, I don’t know: they could! Something could have happened) none of the above happens and the most interesting and exciting part of the episode is when they start to slightly drift off course and Jake has to main the sails. Jesus Christ on toast! Is this The Onedin Line in space or what? Bo-ring. I mean, come on, let’s be honest: who gives a rat’s ass what the ancient Bajorans did? The current ones are boring enough.

Written by (well the teleplay anyway) Rene Echevarria, who also penned the drivel that is “I, Borg” for TNG, demystifying and emasculating the most badass aliens ever to threaten a Federation starship. He did however create the series The 4400, though on the other side of the coin he was also showrunner on Spielberg’s borefest Terra Nova.

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Title: “Turnabout intruder”
Series: TOS
Season: Three
Writer(s): Gene Roddenberry and Arthur H. Singer
Main character(s): Kirk
Plot: After she uses an alien machine to bodyswap with Kirk, Dr. Janice Lester attempts to take over the Enterprise and have Kirk committed or killed.

Could there be a more misogynistic episode of any series? It gets something of a pass, being the final episode of the series but still. The idea of this woman taking over Kirk’s body and then “betraying herself” by her “emotional and irrational” behaviour --- typical woman! --- is both ludicrous and offensive. What Roddenberry was saying, basically, here, or at least the message that came across from it was that women are highly-strung, emotional creatures not fit for command. Now that may have flown and been acceptable in the sixties, but really, could you be more insulting to fifty percent of the world’s population? No wonder early Trek had few female viewers! Mind you, Roddenberry’s chauvinistic view of women has already been well explored, not least in the attire of the female crew and the lack of any women in positions of command, but even for him this is a new low, and a terrible way to sign off.

It does afford Kirk the chance to indulge himself, playing essentially two people, as he had in “Mirror, mirror” and “The enemy within”. and though he hams it up he’s not bad. Lester, played by Sandra Smith, is actually the better actor here, keeping calm (though of course she is meant to be Kirk) until she is transferred back (with very little scientific explanation) at the end, whereupon she goes totally mad. Her insane decree that Kirk, Spock and Scotty are to be executed --- yes, you read that right: executed --- is the final straw that tips the balance, but it’s ridiculous that the crew go along with such a wild and un-Kirklike order. Very little to save this episode, and as I said, it’s an awful end to a superb series.

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Title: “Skin of evil”
Series: TNG
Season: One
Writer(s): Hannah Louise Shearer and Joseph L. Scanlan
Main character(s): Troi, Picard
Plot: After crashlanding on a remote asteroid, Troi is trapped in the wreckage of a shuttlecraft, but when the Enterprise crew come to rescue her they are stopped by an alien being. Why? Why not…

Oh there are some awful episodes in season one, and I could have chosen any of half a dozen or more, some of which will feature here in due course. But this one takes the proto-biscuit for just being a case of “why the fuck?” There’s no explanation given for where Armus, the alien who looks like a cross between liquid Terminator II and a jawa, came from, why it behaves as it does, or even how the crew, who appear trapped by it, escape in the end. Sirtis puts in a decent performance in her limited role, but the bulk of the episode goes to Picard really, as he tries to reason with, and then sneers at Armus. Riker’s drowning-in-a-pool-of-oil is a well done scene but ultimately pointless, as indeed is the whole episode.

Of course, if this episode is remarkable or memorable for anything, it is the sudden, unexpected and pointless death of security chief Tasha Yar, a shamelessly lazy device to have the actress released from her contract at her request. I didn’t particularly like Yar, but we had grown accustomed to her, and for her to die in this grossly “Redshirt” manner was a bit of a kick in the teeth to we fans, I feel. There is at least the touching eulogy and funeral ceremony at the end, which does its best to save the episode but it is well beyond salvation from the moment we meet Armus, and the fact that Picard literally just shrugs his shoulders and says “Fuck you” to the alien and leaves, when the whole idea has been built up that he can not leave, is being restrained here, just makes me roll my eyes. Awful, awful episode.

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Dissenting opinion time: I really like "Explorers." Coming off "The Die is Cast," any episode bound by plot or intrigue is going to feel inferior, so the show decides to spend an hour playing the emotional beats. Season 4 rip-roars through plot at a ridiculous clip, to the point that having a chance to sit back and enjoy spending time with the characters is a relief. It's nice to see that Sisko has interests (outside of baseball and 20th century Earth racial politics) - his fascination with ancient Bajoran space travel gives him shades of Geeky Dad. After seeing him in full-on badass mode it's a real treat to see him embracing his inner dork.

I'm less of a fan of Bashir's plot in this episode (it's a little too after-school special) but I don't think it brings down the episode as a whole, which is a nice denouement to the epic insanity that precedes it.

As a humble sacrifice, I submit for consideration what I consider DS9's biggest turkey: "Profit and Lace." We've got Quark sexually harassing his employees (and it being played for laughs), Grand Nagus Zek, Quark's sex change operation that results in immediate worry about his looks, "There go his hormones," an around-the-table running scene ... it's a mess.

I mean, I'm as big a fan of Monty Python and Kids in the Hall style drag as anyone but this is not good. It's broad "humor" (no pun intended) based on the most outlandish of stereotypes - he talks in a whisper! he walks sexy! he's overly sensitive! He ends up having to fend off sexual assault but then "coming around" and making out with the other Ferengi anyway. And at the end of it all, he vows to never blackmail females again! Well, except not.

It's creepy, it's vile, it's disgusting, and it's DS9 at its worst. I'd watch "Move Along Home" a million times before I'd touch "Profit and Lace" again.

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It’s a big galaxy out there, and as Ford Prefect once remarked, there’s all sorts of people out there, trying to rip you off, kill you … always helps to know where your towel is. Or, if you’re not familiar with “The Hitch-Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”, then it’s at least desirable to know as much as possible about the beings you share the galaxy with. Of course, in the twenty-third century each race has its own agenda and most if not all have their own military, so everyone is at one time or another spying on everyone else, and though there’s generally, usually a state of peace or at least uneasy truce between the races, disputes can boil over into conflict and lead to war, so intelligence about the aliens who may be your friends or allies today but may be your enemies tomorrow is crucial.

In this section I’ll be looking at a specific race, telling you all I know or can find out about them, how they fit into the universe and any other stuff about them that may seem interesting or good to know. I’ll be referring, obviously, to when and how they fit into the series, and how if at all they developed from their original form, as many of the races here did. Please note that these are my own written articles from my own head, based on what I know about the series and the various races, and although I have referred to Wiki and other sources for confirmation or clarification of certain issues, this is not a copied Wiki article or anything close to it. It is also nothing like a comprehensive essay on any race, but just something to give those of you who may not know these aliens a basic grounding in who they are, where they fit into the plots, and how they relate to the other aliens. There is surely much left out, though hopefully nothing here is incorrect, and if you want to read further there are tons of articles all over the interweb, many of which are well worth reading. However do be careful if you’re doing this, as many of these articles and sites quote events in the series that you may not be aware of, and could very well contain spoilers for you. As could these, to a smaller degree.

The one I’ll kick off with is one that most if not everybody will be familiar with, the oldest aliens in Star Trek and the traditional nemeses of Captain Kirk and his crew.
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Klingons

Class: Humanoid, warlike
Home planet: Qu’onos
Feature in: TOS, TNG, DS9, VOY
Klingons of note: Kah’less the Unforgettable, Molor, Kang, Gorkon, Gowron, Worf, Bel’enna Torres, Kurn, Martok, K’mpec
Values: Honour, courage, respect, honesty, fighting prowess

Originally seen as the bad guys of the original Star Trek series, Klingons were one-dimensional villians for Kirk and the Enterprise to fight against and triumph over. Warlike, always seeking strength through conquest, and jeering at the Federation’s noble aims of peace through democracy and diplomacy, Klingons were I guess essentially the Russians to the Federation’s basic Americans, the Commies of the cosmos. Very limited, their appearance originally was not like the guy shown above. They were merely humans with darker skin and their faces shaped into a somewhat devilish look, giving them the aspect of satyrs or demons. They had little in the way of philosophy --- I guess “survival of the strongest” or “To the victor the spoils” would be some of the mantras they lived by --- and were, originally, looked on very unsympathetically by the writers. They were warriors, but they were always warriors. They had no time for talking, peace treaties or conferences, and they preferred, when possible, to shoot first. Ask questions later? That would be a novel concept for a Klingon, indeed! Perhaps they might ask, “Why did you wait so long to shoot?” but that would be about it.

With the emergence of TNG, and a whole different attitude towards the USSR and racism in general, with the Cold War over and Gorbachev making massive strides to bring the Soviet people into the twentieth century (steps that would be reversed thirty years later as Putin dragged his country back into the days of the hardline communist regimes), the Klingons were given more of a backstory and seen with if not a more sympathetic eye, at least a less biased one. This was necessary because, apart from anything else, there was now one serving aboard Picard’s Enterprise, and the story of how that happened would take pages in itself. But a quick recap of how relationships between the Klingon Empire and the Federation thawed:

As the onset of the twenty-fourth century loomed, a ecological and industrial disaster hit the Klingon Empire when one of the moons orbiting their home planet Qo’nos (pronounced “cone-nose” but I’ve heard it referred to as “Chronos”; may just be pronunciation issues) exploded. Praxis was the base for all the fuel the Klingons mined for use in their ships and their industry. Foreseeing the very real prospect of their extinction, the Klingon High Command opened talks with the Federation, with a view towards healing the divisions between the two races and finally bringing to an end the almost-state-of-war that had existed for over seventy years. When the crew of the USS Enterprise, NCC-1701C, gave their lives defending a Klingon outpost from marauding Romulans, the pact was sealed and the Klingons could see that their new ally was indeed honourable. Honour is a value Klingons cherish and prize above all else, including their lives, and there was and is no higher honour to them than for an enemy to die defending them. Soon afterwards the Klingons, though never admitted to nor asking for membership of the Federation, were allies of the humans.

Klingons are a warrior race. They prize such qualities as courage, valour, honesty, strength, cunning and of course as I said above honour. To a degree, they could be likened to the ancient Greek warriors, the Spartans, in that every single thing they do is geared towards combat, conquest and war. Being allies of the Federation meant that could no longer make war on them of course, but there were plenty of other aliens in the galaxy they could challenge and take on. As with the Spartans, from a young age every boy is trained in the noble arts of combat, learning to use the weapons endemic to the Empire, including the curved double-handled four-bladed sword known as the bat’leth, but also to master the art of hand-to-hand combat, learning all there is to know about martial arts, breathing techniques, yoga and meditation. The dynasty of each Klingon family proceeds from the father, and is referred to as a House. Presidency of the House is passed from father to eldest son, and thence to either his son or the next eldest if he should be killed. Women are not valued as warriors, owners of property or soldiers in the Empire, though that is not to say they are second-class citizens. Indeed, many a Klingon wife can lay low with a few sharp blows of her tongue a warrior who counts many kills among his tally, and whom others rightly fear!

The Empire has of course an Emperor, but the title is largely representational, with the true power lying in the men who make up the High Council. It is they who set policy, direct the military, govern spending and dispense justice. Klingons speak their own language, a harsh, gutteral tongue, and will speak humanoid only if necessary. They may be allies of the Federation but they do not fully trust them, and see them as weak and ineffectual as they try to persuade with words where Klingons would rule by the fist. Klingons are proud of their lineage and always make sure anyone knows whose son they are. Although they have their legends, they proudly boast (whether true or not I don’t know) that they slew their gods, and they worship instead great heroes and warriors, the greatest among them being Kahless (kay-less), the very first Emperor, who, Moses-like, laid down their rules of conduct and honour.

Klingons are a fiercely proud people and for them cowardice is the one stain they cannot stand. They would far prefer to die in battle than run and live to fight another day, and the worst fear of any Klingon warrior is that he will die in bed, of old age, and not be admitted into the halls of heroes like the ancient Vikings upon whom so much of their culture appears to be based. This leads to one of their favourite battlecries: “Today is a good day to die!” They are fearless, often reckless though, thinking with the sword rather than the brain, more worried about appearing weak and craven for retreating than about taking on superior numbers. They live for the fight, and chafe in this new peacetime into which circumstance has forced them, so spend their off-hours drinking, singing battle songs and fighting.

Only one of their number has ever served on a Starfleet vessel, and Worf, son of Mogh, who has some human heritage in him, later left the Enterprise to take up station at Deep Space 9, where he became tactical chief of operations. Worf has a son, Alexander, who is not interested in the ways of his father and does not want to be a warrior. He is a constant source of worry to his proud father, Alexander’s mother having been killed by a traitor to the Empire, who was himself shortly thereafter despatched to the netherworld by Worf.

As this is not behaviour countenanced by Starfleet Worf was reprimanded for it, but as a Klingon he had to satisfy his honour, and his people approved. As in all things with Klingons, honour is the driving force behind them, and if one of their number is seen to be acting without it, they can expect to be shunned.

Woo-hoo! A comment! And from one of my favourite ladies too! :)
Well I disagree about "Explorers" but of course that's only my opinion. I just find it dull, dull, and ... what's that word ... tip of my tongue ... oh yeah: dull. It's slow and uninteresting. I mean, "Final mission" was boring but at least there was a point to it. I hated the way I thought "Oh finally something's happening!" when a Cardassian warship showed up, only to find it was a bloody bad-tempered escort! Boo!

As for "Profit and lace", well it's hard to choose any Ferengi story as a bad one, but I could be persuaded in the case of this one. It's almost as if the ghost of Gene Roddenberry was looking over the writer's shoulder, egging him on (I assume it was a guy; too lazy to check at the moment). Yeah, it could get chosen, certainly, though you would be possibly surprised at the amount of poor episodes I've discovered while making my list.

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Time’s movin’ on people, and we ain’t as pretty as we used to be! Even I have metamorphosed from a skinny bespectacled nerd with lovely flowing long black hair into a skinny bespectacled nerd with very little hair. How has time treated our favourite Star Trek actors though? Check out the “before” and “after” pics below!
TOS
William Shatner (Captain Kirk)
Then
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now
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Nichelle Nichols (Uhura)
Then
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Now
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George Takei (Sulu)
Then
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Now
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Walter Koenig (Chekov)
Then
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Now
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We also pay our sincere respects to those who have passed on beyond the great barrier and are no longer with us: DeForest Kelly (Dr. McCoy), James Doohan (Scotty), Majel Barrett-Roddenberry (Nurse Chapel/Lwaxanna Troi/Computer Voice) and most tragically of all, Leonard Nimoy (Spock) who passed away less than a week ago.

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Interestingly, perhaps inevitably, all Star Trek series begin with a two-hour (sometimes broken into two parts) premiere episode, and so it is with the first to pick up the baton after Kirk and Co had warped off into hypergalactic retirement, Star Trek: The Next Generation. This is often tricky, as if you make it too boring (as in “The Cage”) you can damage your prospects of being picked up by the network. But while “Encounter at Farpoint” is far from the best TNG episode, even in season one, there was never a danger of it not being picked up, as it was to be the triumphant return of the franchise after over twenty-five years in the wilderness, and the audience was certainly there for it. More, there were two distinct audience demographics: those who had grown up on the original and were either salivating at the prospect of its return (or waiting to tear it apart with savage commentary and criticism; didn't matter, they still had to watch it first) and those who either had never seen it and were interested, or else were just science-fiction fans. There wasn't much of sci-fi on the TV at that time, and so anything even vaguely space related was welcome. Plus TNG was coming in on the cusp of a new sci-fi revival, with films like Star Wars, Alien, ET and Blade Runner, to say nothing of four Trek movies whetting the appetites of sci-fi enthusiasts young and old. It was, in short, a great time for the Return of the King.

But any show that has reached such iconic, almost legendary status is going to be hard to replicate, and the inevitable comparisons would be made, so how to make this not simply a continuation of the original series, but a quantum leap forward? Well, plenty of ways. First of all, while maintaining the accepted family atmosphere aboard ship, the “power trio” idea had to be dispensed with. The original Star Trek had mostly focussed on Kirk, Spock and McCoy, with occasional contributions from the likes of Scotty, Uhura or Sulu, and later Chekov, but I don't think there's one episode in the entire three-season run that did not feature all three of the main characters. This put the others at a disadvantage, relegating them to the position almost of bit players, guest stars even. An episode would survive the absence of Sulu or Scotty, and much of the time Uhura was just a glorified telephone operator, but the three main men always had to be in the camera's crosshairs.

TNG sought to do away with that to an extent. While it's true that the captain was, and always would be, the centre of any action, this new series “farmed out” or even shared out the adventure. It would not be unheard of for Doctor Crusher, Geordi or Worf to have their own episode, and even the “kid” on board, Wesley, would feature prominently in later ones. Relationships would be explored and developed, and to a much greater degree than had been in the original series, where little more than a hint that Nurse Chapel was in love with Spock was allowed, or references were made to Kirk's many ex-girlfriends and conquests. Here, everyone was related in one way or another. Geordi and Data would become fast friends. Riker and Troi had past history they were still trying to get past, and even the captain had a romantic interest in the doctor, although it would be some time indeed before he would admit it, more before he would act on it.

The crew was larger, the ship more powerful and majestic, and the storylines would of course be more far-reaching, deep and intelligent, and there would be, by and large, little of the easy humour for which Star Trek had become known. Picard was a hard man, an authoritarian who seldom smiled, disliked and distrusted children, and seemed to have few hobbies other than reading. He was a solitary man, alone among over a thousand souls, with responsibility for their safety, and though his crew were loyal to him and would follow him into Hell, at first he does come across rather a little like Christopher Pike on his one and only voyage aboard the USS Enterprise.

“Encounter at Farpoint”

On the way to Deneb IV, the new USS Enterprise, under the command of Captain Jean-Luc Picard, is heading towards its first mission. A starbase has been built there, called Farpoint Station, and the Federation wish to know how it was built so quickly and if more can be built. Picard is yet awaiting the arrival of his ship's doctor and first officer, who are to meet them at the station. En route though they are suddenly accosted by a malevolent intelligence which manifests upon the ship's bridge, calling itself “The Q”. It accuses the human race of being a “dangerous, savage child race” and directs Picard and his crew to return to their home planet. Picard of course refuses, loudly proclaiming the advances humanity has made, and the creature, seemingly intrigued by the captain's ideas of testing them, retires, promising to return.

The Q has however blocked the path of the Enterprise with a weblike net, which Picard now attempts to break away from. He prepares the ship for “saucer separation”, a procedure which will detach the main bridge in the flat, disc-like section of the top of the ship from the main body. As they accelerate away from the net it follows them, and they find it impossible to outrun. Picard orders the saucer separation, and despite his chagrin, Worf is ordered to take command of the saucer section, into which all the women and children have been herded. The remainder of the ship, now known as “the battle bridge” turns to take on the “hostile” as it gains on them. It is however a futile action, and Picard reluctantly orders their surrender.

Once he does, they all find themselves in a courtroom, where the judge is none other than the intelligence known as The Q. Troi confirms that, though the scene they are in is out of the late twenty-first century, and cannot be real, must be an illusion, it is real. The Q again accuses the crew of being savage and dangerous, and tricks them into admitting their guilt under duress. Outmanoeuvred, Picard puts forward a challenge: let the Q test him and his crew, let them represent what mankind has become, and let him see if they have in fact evolved beyond what the powerful alien accuses them of. The Q is satisfied, even happy with the outcome, and tells Picard that solving the mystery of Farpoint Station will serve as his litmus test. The court dissolves, and Picard and his crew are back aboard their vessel.

Meanwhile, at Farpoint Station, Commander William Riker awaits the arrival of the Enterprise and visits the man in command of the station, an alien named Zorn. He expresses amazement that the station could have been built so quickly, and so perfectly suited to the needs of the Federation. Zorn is evasive, refusing to answer questions, but when Riker has left he seems annoyed and berates something above him, almost as if he is talking to the ceiling. He talks of “arousing their suspicion”, and it's clear that something here does not meet the eye. Riker meets up with the ship's doctor, Beverley Crusher, who is also awaiting the arrival of the ship. He tells her and her son, Wesley, that he has noticed odd things about this station. Just now, he had wanted an apple and though there was none in the bowl proffered him by Zorn, a moment later there was another bowl which he could swear had not been there, and yes, it had apples in it. Similarly, Crusher looks at some cloth and notes it would be nice if there were a gold pattern on it, and suddenly there is. She of course thinks he's seeing conspiracies where none exist, and looking for ways to impress his new captain, but he is sure it's more than just an overactive imagination.

Riker is somewhat surprised to learn that Crusher is on first-name terms with the new captain, but Wesley advises him that it was Picard who brought the body of his father home, when he fell in an away mission, some years ago. Geordi LaForge, navigator aboard the ship and also awaiting its arrival so that he can take his position, reports to Riker that the ship has reached orbit but is missing the saucer section. Picard has ordered Riker to beam aboard immediately, as he does. Almost right away he is shown footage of what has transpired with The Q, and then Picard receives news that the saucer section is ready to reunite with the main ship. Seeing this as an early test of his first officer's competence and his ability to work under pressure, the captain orders Riker to conduct the reintegration of the ship, manually, a task he carries out perfectly. Picard grudgingly congratulates him on his prowess, though calls it “a fairly routine manoeuvre.” He does however take issue with his new second-in-command's determination to second-guess the captain when he deems he is putting himself in unnecessary danger.

Here though the mask slips a little and Picard allows himself a moment of weakness, as he admits he is not good with children, and asks, well orders I suppose, Riker to help him in that area. LaForge shows Crusher his visor, a computer implant that allows him to see, even though he is blind. Usage of the implant does cause him pain, but he suffers it in order to be able to see, even if he does not see the same way we do: his visor detects electromagnetic waves, colour spectrums etc. Riker is looking for Data, but Worf tells him that the android is on “special assignment”, ferrying a special guest, an admiral, to the Enterprise by shuttlecraft. This turns out to be McCoy, in what's a pretty shamefully self-indulgent cameo that last about a minute. As they prepare to leave Farpoint, The Q appears again on the viewscreen, advising them that if they do not solve the problem in twenty-four hours they risk summary judgement against them.

Riker is reintroduced to Deanna Troi, the Ship's Counsellor, but Picard is unaware they are ex-lovers. Troi is half Betazoid and therefore telepathic, and she and Riker share an uncomfortable, though private moment when she speaks to his mind only. They keep their relationship from the captain, admitting only that they know each other. All three beam down to the station and meet with Zorn, who is less than happy at Deanna's presence, she being a telepath. He is also annoyed at Picard's attempts to get him to agree to build other starbases for them, or to trade for the materials and knowledge that allowed them to build Farpoint. He makes it clear he is interested in entertaining neither suggestion, and just wants to sell the rights to use this station alone. While there, Troi experiences powerful emotions --- negative, painful ones, ones of loss and despair, but she can't say from where these feelings are emanating. As the exchanges get more heated, and all their questions continue to be evaded, the trio leave a fuming Zorn, unsure of what is going on.

Riker gets his first taste of the brand new Holodeck, a holographic projection room on the ship which can be programmed for any environment, scene or fantasy. He is looking for Data and finds him here, as well as Wesley Crusher. Data shows how superhumanly strong he is when he lifts Wesley with one hand when the kid falls into a holographically-created, but very real and very wet, stream. Riker also finds out, to his amusement, that the one thing Data wishes is to be human. He has not the software to accomplish this, but is trying to add to his programme by trying things like whistling, and hopes that by better studying humans and coming to understand them, he may one day emulate them. In the tunnel below Farpoint Station, Geordi is unable to identify the material the walls are constructed from, and Deanna receives even harsher images and emotions, making her sink to her knees in despair.

A strange alien vessel arrives and begins to attack the planet, firing unknown weapons down at the city below. It does however appear to be avoiding hitting the station itself. It refuses to respond to hails, and Zorn professes to know nothing about it, though Picard is loath to believe him. He knows, all right: it's in his voice. He's hiding something, and the arrival of the alien vessel has thrown him into almost a panic. Picard orders Riker, still on the planet, to bring him to the Enterprise where they will get what information he has out of him. However, before they can do so someone else teleports him away. Troi begins to sense a new emotion: satisfaction, but it is not from the same source. The Q reappears, gloating over Picard's inability to solve the conundrum, goading him that he has not the brains to figure it out. Q, tiring of their efforts and looking to be amused, gives them a clue: beam over to the alien vessel, he advises them, and though Picard is against it Riker volunteers to go, which impresses the seemingly-omnipotent alien.

Picard goes to Crusher, to apologise for his stiff and overly formal welcome to her: she is an old friend, or at least the wife of an old friend, and he should have been more forthcoming. He tells her that serving aboard the Enterprise may be hard for her, being constantly reminded of her husband through him, and suggests a transfer, which he will approve, but she turns him down, saying she is where she needs and wants to be. In fact, she tells him, she requested the post. On the alien vessel, Troi Data and Riker find Zorn held captive and in pain, while the empath feels anger, revenge, satisfaction from a much closer source than before.

As they rescue Zorn, Q reappears on the bridge, sneering at Picard's efforts to unravel the mystery, but when the away team returns, sent back by the alien vessel, he begins to see it. The vessel is not a ship but a living being, and it is trying to help --- rescue --- one of its own kind which has been trapped on the planet surface below. Creatures who can convert energy into matter, the second alien was pressed into service by Zorn and his people, forced to assume the shape of Farpoint Station, and allowed only enough energy to survive but not to break free. Picard has the Enterprise beam energy down to it, allowing it to break free and join its mate. Farpoint Station is no more, the duplicity has been uncovered, Q is disappointed that the humans solved the puzzle and vanishes in a huff. Picard leans forward and declares “Let's see what's out there!”

Quotes
Troi: “Captain! I'm sensing a powerful mind.”
(Picard surely wants to blush, and say “Well, I wouldn't say massive, but if you insist...”! ;) )

Data: “It registers as solid, Captain.”
Troi: “Or an incredibly powerful forcefield! Captain, if we collide with it at this speed---”
Picard: “Shut off that damn noise!”
(Picard is referring to the red alert warning, but you can just hear Deanna grumping “I'm only saying. No need to be rude!” :rofl:)

Picard: “Let's see what this “Galaxy”-class starship can do!”

Picard: “Commander, signal the following in all languages and on all frequencies: we surrender.”
(And a generation of Trekkers put their heads in their hands and groan “Kirk would never have surrendered!” Welcome to the new generation...)

Zorn (to the air apparently): “You have been told not to do that! Why can't you understand? It will arouse their suspicion, and if that happens, we will have to punish you! We will, I promise you!”

Picard: “I'm not a family man, Riker, and yet Starfleet has given me a ship with children aboard. I'm not comfortable with children. But since a captain needs an image of geniality, you're to see that's what I project.”

McCoy: “I see no points on your ears, boy, but you sure sound like a Vulcan!”
Data: “No, Sir. I am an android.”
McCoy: “Hmph! Almost as bad!”

Picard: “Counsellor, may I introduce our new First Officer, Commander William Riker. Commander, this is our Ship's Counsellor, Deanna Troi.”
Troi: “A pleasure, Commander.”
Riker: “Likewise, Counsellor.”
Picard: “Have you two met before?”
Riker: “Yes sir, we have.”
Picard: “Excellent. I consider it important for my key officers to know each other's abilities.”
Troi: “We do sir, we do.”
(How little he knows of their shared history, and the unheard telepathic message Troi sends to her “Imzadi”!)

Zorn: “Captain! The Ferengi would be very interested in a base such as this!”
Picard: “Fine. Let's hope they find you as tasty as they did their past associates!”

Riker: “But you're ...”
Data: “A machine, Sir, yes. Does that trouble you?”
Riker: “Honestly, yes.”
Data: “Understood, Sir. Prejudice is very human.”
Riker: “Now that does trouble me. Do you consider yourself superior to humans?”
Data: “I am superior, Sir, in many ways. But I would give it all up, to be human.”
Rike: “Nice to meet you, Pinocchio.”

Picard: “Some problem, Commander?”
Riker: “Just wondering if all our missions will go this way, Sir?”
Picard: “Oh no, Number One. I'm sure most of them will be much more interesting. Let's see what's out there.”

Parallels
There's a very distinct similarity here in what Q is doing to what Squire Trelayne made Kirk undergo in “The Squire of Gothos.” He, too, was a judge and accused Kirk, whom he then hunted.

There are also slightly less similar, but still alike, parallels to be drawn with “Devil n the dark”, in which the killer of miners on a planet is found to be a creature that can burrow through solid rock, and which is killing in revenge for the destruction of its eggs, cracked when the miners broke into a shaft which was in fact the creature's nursery.

It wasn't meant to be this way!
Sometimes ideas were barely pencilled in and fleshed out later, so that things changed over the course of the series, many of them taking on totally different aspects and meanings than they were originally intended to have.

Q, presented here as a dark, evil, all-powerful enemy, would soon become the butt of jokes, a nuisance, an annoyance and at one point, an unwilling member of the crew. He would become a source of comic relief, but one thing that would always be true was that, like Mister Burns in any episode of The Simpsons, you could be guaranteed a good story if he were in it.

Data, the android officer, quickly loses his stilted syntax, where he prefaces each statement with a qualifier, such as “Inqury: blah blah” or “Supposition: blah bah.” This would probably have got old very quickly, and was in fact dispensed with by the end of this episode.

The Ferengi are here mentioned only, and painted as a deeply unlikeable race who seem quite savage. When we actually meet them, in “The last outpost”, for the first time, and later, in “The battle”, this image will be kept up to an extent. But fairly quickly it becomes obvious that the Ferengi, small with huge ears and an abiding passion for wealth and its creation, and retention, are more comic relief than anything. In fact, of all the many characters and races throughout all four series and incarnations of the programme, none would come to be more loved and give us more amusement than the Ferengi, especially when we get to Deep Space 9 and meet Quark. But that's for another time. For now, all I can say is that whatever they were meant to start out as, the Ferengi became something totally different, a real and true example perhaps of a character or type taking over its own destiny, and writing itself as it wanted to be written.

Ch-ch-ch-changes

There were of course many changes from the original series, the first and most evident in the opening titles. Whereas Kirk spoke of a “five year mission” --- no doubt in the hopes that the series would get five seasons, no such luck! --- Picard talks of an “ongoing mission”. Ironic really, as TNG ended up running for seven full seasons, so he could theoretically have said “her seven year mission”. Also, the ship is not anthropomorphised, neither in the credits nor in the show. It is always “it” or “the ship”, never “she”, that I can remember. Speaking of gender neutrality, the original voiceover had declared that the mission was “to boldly go where no man has gone before”, but now it was “to boldly go where no-one has gone before”, so they kept the tagline but updated it for the more PC 1980s. Mind you, given Picard's lack of hair, it could have been rather unkindly changed to "To baldly go..." ;)

The ship has gone from being a Constitution-class vessel with about 400 crew to having a complement of over a thousand and being upgraded to “Galaxy”-class. It's still powered, however, by the humble dilithium crystals that provided engine power to NCC-1701, and indeed, speaking of that, it retains the construction number but with an extra letter, so that it is now NCC-1701D. Some things are not open to that much change.

Whereas the original Enterprise was essentially a warship, an exploratory but primarily military vessel, with only the crew aboard essential to its operation, the new incarnation is more of a floating city, or at least floating apartment block, with families living there, shops and schools and recreational facilities all provided. Plus of course the Holodeck, of which more later. The primary goal of NCC-1701D is not combat, but exploration, and though it's armed as well as any warship in the fleet --- and is in fact the flagship --- Picard tries to rely more on diplomacy than brute strength in any negotiation. Of course, if that fails then the ship is more than able to hold its own.

Expanding on the multi-cultural idea central to the franchise, NCC-1701D has as part of its crew not only an android and a telepath, but one of the traditional enemies of the Federation, a Klingon, though we will find later on that the age-old “cold war” that had been raging between the two races over the run of TOS has come to an end, and they are now uneasy allies.

Oh, those uniforms! Seems for the Counsellor at any rate, the idea that drove the Original Series was still in vogue, and Deanna wears a quite short minidress, which quickly disappeared to be replaced by, um, a tight catsuit affair? Eventually her clothing would become more flattering and respectable, and her hair, down here but which will be for much of the first season stuck up in a very unbecoming bun, would soon flow loosely about her shoulders, allowing her to reveal the sexy woman who hid behind the cold mask of the half-Betazoid Counsellor.

The captain, too, is far from the genial, easy manner of James Kirk. Here, he's a tough authoritarian, a disciplinarian, a stickler for the rules. Slow to smile or see a joke, keeping himself aloof and unapproachable, he's almost a throwback in personality to Captain Pike. The difference here, and it's an important one, is that he is surrounded by interesting, likeable characters who, while they will certainly include the captain in their circle if and when he requires or demands it, are perfectly capable of socialising with each other and building their own strong bonds and relationships among one another. So although the captain might seem to be cold and unforgiving, his crew are quite the opposite, and though he will be the central figure in the series, there will be episodes which will take place around or even without him, and they will generally not suffer from his being the figure in the frame.

This is also the first time Star Trek will feature actors other than American ones (Sulu and Chekov excepted): the man in charge is English, something of a cosmic shift for US science-fiction, and portrayed as being of French descent, another first.

Holodeck Stories
The Holodeck is indeed an amazing technological marvel. Using the latest advances in dimensional hologrammatical creation, anything that can be imagined can be programmed into the ship's computer and realised as a holodeck simulation. This will lead to many stories being set on, or around, the Holodeck and here I'll be talking about how this innovation is used, whether its use helps or hinders the story, and whether, as the series gathered pace, the writers tended to rely a little too much on it for their storylines.

We're introduced to the Holodeck here, and it's totally incredible. Virtual reality to the nth degree; a real forest is created within the environs of the ship, so real that when Wesley falls into a stream he emerges from the holodeck soaking wet. Data explains it thusly: some matter within the holodeck itself has been reconfigured to make things like trees, rocks, and presumably, streams to be used in the simulation. I don't quite understand this, or whether it was an idea they stuck to, as when someone shuts the holodeck simulation off, we're left staring at basically a gridlike pattern in the room, the bare building blocks of the holodeck. So where, then, has the material that was supposed to be being converted gone? If there is nothing in the room, and if everything has been fabricated from a virtual reality programme, then why, when you leave the holodeck wet are you still dripping water onto the deck, outside the simulation? Is it because the programme is still running? But if you were to meet a hologrammatically-created character in there, one who existed nowhere else but in the simulation, and he or she or it tried to cross the threshold of the holodeck, it would vanish. We will see it happen: nothing truly “exists” beyond the confines of the simulated world. So by that logic, the water Wesley fell into should not either, and he should emerge dry.

Someone with deeper knowledge of the workings of the holodeck might be able to answer that. For me, it's a bit of a conundrum that, certainly within the strictures of the series, is never adequately addressed or explained. Similarly, if the wall is actually there physically, but “disguised as forest”, as Data points out when he throws a rock seemingly into the trees and it bounces off the bulkhead, how have they been able to walk “through” that bulkhead just a moment before? Holodeck mechanics will always confuse me. I mean, no matter how realistic the simulation is, how can you walk, drive or ride a road for an hour that is in reality situated in a space which would take you at best ten minutes to traverse? I don't think it's ever adequately explained though, so I certainly won't attempt to.

A real, live boy!
Data's continual pursuit of humanity is a recurring theme throughout the entire series. In this section I'll be cataloguing his efforts --- successful and less so --- to become as human as he can make himself, from physical changes to, more usually, the way he relates to the others in the crew, and they to him.

Even here, he has already dropped the qualifier before each sentence, as I already mentioned, and by the end he is frowning that he seems to be commenting on everything. Riker tells him to keep it up; it's a very human thing to do. Riker has already called him “friend”, which must please the android. Or would, if he knew what pleasure was and could recognise it. He reveals here that his rank of Lieutenant Commander is not honourary, as Riker had assumed: he went through the entire Starfleet Academy course and earned his uniform, just as any other living entity has to.

Family
Somewhat like the original pilot “The Cage”, the pilot for TNG begins with certain things already in motion. The new Enterprise is on her maiden voyage, to be sure, but certain relationships have already been established, or hinted at. This serves to give these characters history almost immediately and make us care about them, unlike the hamfisted way the TOS pilot went about it. Here I'll be cataloguing the relationships that spring up, fall apart, bind together and in some cases threaten to tear the crew apart.

Riker and Troi
We are given an insight into their history together when Troi communicates telepathically with Riker, intimating that they have had a previous sexual or romantic relationship. She calls him, in his head, imzadi, which we later learn is the Betazoid word for “beloved”. She talks about not having wanted to say goodbye, and asks if he remembers their last liaison. They say nothing of this to the captain, who might see this as a conflict of interest, romance in the workplace and all that. Riker must however be somehow unaware of Deanna's posting to the Enterprise, as he acts shocked and embarrassed and uncomfortable when he is “introduced” to her by the captain.

Their relationship threatens to resurface and overpower their duty when Troi shouts after Riker, worrying he may be hurt by staying on the planet while ordering her to return to the ship. He retorts coldly “You have your orders”, but some part of him must be gratified to see she still cares for him. As does he for her; when she is experiencing such strong emotions below the city that they threaten to overwhelm her, he flies to her side and apologises for ordering her to open her mind, even though he knows that it was necessary, even vital. But prior to that, afraid of being alone with her, and how it might compromise their mission, he refutes her suggestion as they are splitting up that she should go with him, and instead goes with Data.

Picard and Crusher
This is a much more low-key relationship throughout the series, but it's clear that Picard, while the best friend of her late husband, has feelings for Beverly, feelings he would never have acted upon or even admitted to while Jack Crusher was alive, and, feeling responsible for his death, will now never reveal, for fear of dishonouring his friend's memory. He believes the posting must be difficult for Crusher, and offers to approve a transfer request, until she tells him she actually requested the posting to his new command. Knowing that she therefore has --- or says she has --- no problem being so close to him, he relaxes but there will always be that undercurrent of repressed sexual tension that could explode at any moment.

Days with Data
Just for the craic, I'll be recording here some of the crazy things Data says, as he struggles to emulate and understand human behaviour. Sometimes they are quite remarkably funny, though here the only one that springs to mind is when he asks Picard to explain what the word “sneak” means, and after the captain has given him some synonyms, he takes over with more, saying “Ah yes! To slink, go stealthily, slither, glide, gumshoe.” It's not really funny, not this time, but it does serve to illustrate how literal he can take the world sometimes, and he will, trust me, come up with some howlers.

I'm actually a guy, Jenny Ondioline is just my favorite Stereolab song!

The writers of "Profit and Lace" are listed as none other than Ira Steven Behr (DS9's showrunner for seasons 4-7 and primary originator of the Dominion War arc) and Hans Beimler (a longtime collaborator and writer for both TNG and DS9). I guess that one was just a complete misfire on all counts!

Um, ok... so why the marry me thing? :confused: I'm a guy too. Anyhoo, hope you're enjoying the features so far. Lots more to come.

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Time to check out the totty --- er, I mean, strong female characters --- in the Trekverse. More than possibly any other science-fiction series, Star Trek has some really important female characters, even a captain of a starship. The first sf series I think to really push women to the forefront, Trek has led the way in redefining the role of women, not only in science-fiction but in drama too. The days when all women did in drama was scream or be terrified or saved by the hero are long gone, and Trek has led the way in abolishing that stereotype.
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Lieutenant Uhura, played by Nichelle Nichols

Of course perhaps one of the most important, certainly one of the first African-American women to be given a role of any substance on television drama, Uhura was the feisty Swahili who, er, manned the switchboard on the original USS Enterprise. Really, to an extent I don’t understand why her role is so trumpeted and celebrated: she was nothing more than a glorified telephone operator and receptionist who took Kirk’s calls. “What? You’ll have to speak up. Cling what? Oh: Klingon! Sorry? No, I’m afraid the Captain is not available for --- what did you say again? --- man to man combat to prove who is the greater leader? No, I’m sorry, he’s currently living in an alternate existence where he moves so fast we can barely make him out as more than an insect’s buzz. Perhaps I can pencil you in for next Thursday? No? You have a planet to conquer. I see. Hmm. Monday week? That’s fine then. I’ll put it in his diary.”

In reality, much of the dialogue Uhura had was along the lines of “Message coming in for you Captain”, or “Hailing frequencies open Sir.” It was only in the movies she got to really step outside her predefined role and actually act a bit. Nevertheless, for the time I suppose it was a big step for her not to be making the synth-coffee, so there is that. Roddenberry’s ideas of equality for women though didn’t stretch to how they were dressed, as every woman on the Enterprise for most of the series wore very short skirts and FMBs. Uhura will however always been known as half of the very first ever interracial kiss on television, though the episode in which this occurs, “Plato’s stepchildren”, was banned for many years, mostly for this very reason but also because of the rather graphic for the time allusions to torture.

Uhura served on the Enterprise from the first episode after the real pilot (she wasn’t there for “The cage” either) and remained there till the end, carrying on to reprise her role in all the movies starring the original Trek crew. As a result of her portrayal of the character Nichelle Nichols got to meet Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., who convinced her to stay on, after she had been considering leaving the show, telling her that she was an icon and a beacon for black Americans. Her role inspired Whoopi Goldberg to test out for the role of Guinan in TNG, but you can’t have everything.

Interestingly, of the few female characters on TOS, Uhura generally did not get treated like a woman, as in, she was not comforted, ignored, laughed at or harrassed. Perhaps because of her role, or because she was black and therefore seen to be tough (or because the studio didn’t wish to shoot themselves in the foot by featuring a black actress and then downplaying her significance) she was generally respected and treated almost as one of the boys. She did occasionally get to go planetside, but not very often. She seems to have had a sort of crush on Kirk, as she says in the aforementioned “Plato’s stepchilden” that he always made her feel safe, always seemed to know what to do, always in command.

Uhura’s character was ported into the reboot of the franchise from 2009, and played by Zoe Saldana.

He was Spock:
A personal tribute to the late Leonard Nimoy, 1931- 2015

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The world was shocked and saddened to hear of the death late last month of Leonard Nimoy, world famous as the actor who brought the Vulcan Spock to the screen, and into our hearts, via our favourite programme. Nimoy had been diagnosed with COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease), brought about through smoking, though he had quit thirty years prior. He had been hospitalised over the months before his death, on and off, but Friday February 27 was to be his final day on Earth. He passed away in his Bel Air, Los Angeles home early in the morning at the age of eighty-three.

Many tributes have of course been and will probably continue to be offered, and mine is a grain of sand beside the thoughts of those who knew him, worked with him and loved him, but I could hardly allow Star Trek Month to pass without attempting my own poor eulogy to, and retrospective of the man who became famous (incorrectly) for having no emotions, but who was one of the warmest, kindest and loved human beings on this planet. As fellow actor William Shatner would say of his friend at the end of Star Trek II: The wrath of Khan: “Of all of the souls I have encountered in my travels, his was the most human.”

Whereas some of the tributes have glanced perhaps a little disrespectfully back to less than salubrious aspects of Nimoy’s life --- his woeful albums, his early acting parts --- I don’t wish to pursue that route. Instead, my intention is to speak a little of his early life as I have read about it, and follow his career through the Star Trek franchise. After all, that’s what we’re interested in this month, yes? So no mention of Bilbo Baggins, Mission: Impossible or Three Men and a Baby, which, while all worthy efforts (well, apart from the first) and of which he was surely and justifiably proud, lead us away from the role for which he attained world fame, and for which he will always be remembered. He write two autobiographies, one titled “I am not Spock”, the other admitting “I am Spock”, and he always would, and will be Spock to us.

Born in 1931 to Jewish parents in Boston, he quickly caught the acting bug and had minor roles in many of the big series of the time, including The Twilight Zone, Bonanza and Wagon train, but it was in a series called The Lieutenant that he caught the eye of a young producer of westerns and cop shows, who was looking for actors to take part in his new science-fiction series. Gene Roddenberry had to fight hard to retain Nimoy’s character on Star Trek, after the main pilot has been turned down by Paramount and the second pilot accepted, but on the advice that he should drop Spock. The only character (although not the only actor) to survive from the original pilot “The Cage”, Spock quickly established himself as a fan favourite and gave the new series a hook. It wasn’t just humans dashing around the galaxy after aliens: Star Trek had an alien on board, and in a position of command too: Spock was Science Officer and also First Officer on the USS Enterprise.

Nimoy’s character provided much background and story material, with an early episode, “The Menagerie”, one of only two two-part episodes (including the original pilot) and which harked back to “The Cage”, showing how dedicated he was to his former commanding officer, to the extent of risking court martial to engineer Pike’s return to Talos IV. Spock’s nerve pinch also singled him out as someone special, and tied in to the idea that his race were extremely non-violent. It of course became a favourite game in the playground or schoolyard; just as kids in the UK were dashing around pretending to be daleks, their US counterparts (and soon, over here too) were neck-pinching each other, and telling each other to “Live long and prosper.”

The cold, logical character of Spock was leavened by Leonard Nimoy’s attempts to bring some humour and warmth to the role, from a simple raising of one eyebrow to a well-chosen retort at his eternal debate nemesis, Dr. McCoy, or even on occasion losing control over his emotions completely, as he did at the end of “Amok time” and during “This side of Paradise”. Played as it had been written originally, Spock might have been a dull, even boring character but between Roddenberry and himself they imbued the emotion-avoiding Vulcan with often more humanity than many of his shipmates. They even gave him a love interest: Nurse Christine Chapel, played by Majel Barrett, who had also survived from the pilot albeit in a new role, was in love with the enigmatic and distant Vulcan, and though he rebuffed her advances all through the series, he did once come close to giving in to his feelings.

Spock’s command abilities, as well as his ability to somehow transcend the limits of his Vulcan logic, would be put to the rest in season one’s “The Galileo seven”, where, trapped in a shuttlecraft and running out of fuel, unable to make it back to the Enterprise he throws the dice, plays a hunch as McCoy later gleefully describes it, and manages to have everyone saved. In “This side of Paradise”, as briefly mentioned above, Spock, along with the rest of the crew, falls victim to alien spores on a planet they visit, which removes all inhibition and allows him to give in to his emotions. It is only cold, Vulcan mathematics and logic that bring him back from the edge and allow him to help Kirk cure the crew. In the celebrated episode “The city on the edge of forever”, he uses his mind-melding powers to allow his captain to forget meeting and falling in love with Edith Keeler, proving there is some humanity in him.

But Spock was never a full Vulcan. His mother was a human from Earth, and so there was scope within the character for him to explore that side of his nature, something others of his people had never, and would never do. It made him somewhat unique, and Trek would revisit this premise later with a half-human, half-Klingon woman in Star Trek Voyager. Season two of the series would open with “Amok time”, cataloguing how difficult it was for Vulcans to be away from home when the mating instinct struck, and how helpless they were and how their behaviour and attitudes changed as their ancient instincts surfaced unbidden and had to be dealt with. Soon after we would be introduced to a very different Spock, in the episode “Mirror, mirror”, in which the crew enter an alternate dimension where the Federation --- under the name the Empire --- is a cruel and repressive force, and Spock, sporting a beard, is a man who tries to balance his own distaste for violence with the exigencies of survival in this brutal world. He is eventually given the chance to change things, something which plays out in later “Mirror universe” episodes of Deep Space 9.

In “Journey to Babel” we meet for the first time Spock’s father, Sarek, Vulcan ambassador, and learn that he opposed his son’s enlisting in Starfleet. This is a thread which will continue throughout Spock, and Sarek’s life, until it is finally resolved in the fourth movie. Sadly, season three would open with one of the worst Trek episodes ever (yeah, even worse than “Fair Haven”!) as we would have to endure “Spock’s brain”, the series hitting its lowest point since previous season two’s “The Omega glory”. However he would quickly be redeemed in the next episode, as he fell in love --- or seemed to --- for the very first time on his own terms with a Romulan sub-commander in “The Enterprise incident”. In this episode we would learn that contrary to belief, Spock had a first name, but as he tells his lover, revealing his deception, “You could not pronounce it.”

In the episode “Is there in truth no beauty” he would sacrifice himself for his shipmates, making direct mental contact with the deadly Medusan ambassador, and being rendered temporarily blind for his pains. Spock certainly believed in the axiom he would later espouse in the movies, that the needs of the many outweighed the needs of the few, and would often put this into practice, reasoning that to put one person in danger in order to save many more was always the most logical course. He would be forced to express his emotions against his will, and act as the torture puppet of the Platonians in “Plato’s stepchildren”, one of the episodes banned for many years for both its almost-graphic depictions of torture and its being the first example on television of a multiracial kiss.

We rarely see Spock relax in the series, or have any downtime, but in “The way to Eden” we learn that not only can he play the Vulcan lyre, he is also aware of and versed in the counterculture of the space hippies who are taken onboard Enterprise and who eventually try to take over the ship. His empathy with, and understanding of their ideals makes him a good go-between when Kirk’s authority is flatly rejected. Spock meets a facsimile of Surak, the father of Vulcan philosophy and the man seen as the saviour of their race in “The savage curtain”, while he again falls in love but has to leave his lover behind when she is unable to come with him back to his own time in “All our yesterdays”, the penultimate episode of the series.

With the cancellation of Star Trek in 1969, Leonard Nimoy joined the cast of, as mentioned briefly, Mission: Impossible, but his own mission impossible was to be the attempt to leave behind the character who had, at that time, been his constant companion for nearly four years. He lent his voice to the later, short-lived Star Trek: The Animated Series and when the natural successor to the original series came along, he was convinced to guest star as Spock --- this time an ambassador, as his father had been --- in the two-part fifth-season episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation “Unification”. In this, an older, wiser Spock is trying desperately to reunite the ancient cousins the Romulans and the Vulcans, but it all turns out to be for nothing.

With the advent of the first Star Trek movie, Nimoy reprised his role, but this time as a much sterner, less emotional and almost totally without humour Spock, although he thaws a little towards the end. Poorly received, both by critics and fans, it would be the second movie that would write the next chapter in the Spock story, while attempting to bring it to a complete close. Tired of playing the character and being typecast (leading to his first autobiography being titled “I am not Spock!”) Nimoy agreed that Spock should be killed off, but he had expected it to happen at the beginning of the movie, in a low-key way, and for it to be permanent. In fact, he only agreed to play the part on that basis. When the script was rewritten however, and he saw how much of an impact his death could have on not only the movie but the fans and his own role, he was much more sanguine about it.

Fan uproar over the leaked details of his death though led to his resurrection being pencilled in, and Star Trek II: the wrath of Khan became the first in a very successful trilogy of movies, spanning one story arc which basically told the story of Spock’s death, rebirth and return over the course of three blockbuster films. For the third movie, The search for Spock, Nimoy wanted to direct, and as he was not in it very much this was not a problem, and his direction was so inspired that he was to take the chair again for the fourth movie. This would, of course, lead to his directing other movies, outside of the franchise, but as I said at the beginning I’m not going to cover them here. Nimoy starred in two more Trek movies before the franchise moved on, with the seventh concerning the “new” crew of TNG and all the original actors signing off over the end credits of Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country, so that there was no doubt that this was their swansong.

And so it was. Nimoy joined the cast of sci-fi series Fringe, but when Star Trek was rebooted in 2009 with a new movie and a whole new cast, he was asked to return as an older, "future" Spock for the movie and did so. He retired from acting the following year, but broke that rule to again play the role of Spock one last time in the second “reboot” movie, the perhaps tragically prophetically titled Star Trek: Into darkness, in 2013. It would of course be the last time any of us ever saw Spock on the screen again.

For over forty years Leonard Nimoy portrayed a character who came to be so inextricably linked, not only with Star Trek but with science-fiction and the future in general, that he has now passed into the shared consciousness of this world, and will never be forgotten. The calm, unblinking, coldly logical alien who could sometimes be more human than humans themselves, and always seemed to have that slight spark in his eyes as Leonard Nimoy peeked out from behind them, will always be in our memory. If there are three words that define Star Trek, even to those who have never seen it, they are Kirk, Enterprise and Spock.

In closing, I would like to quote you the words Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, quoted on the inner sleeve of the Hawkwind album Church of Hawkwind, and which has recently become part of my signature: Lives of great men remind us we can make our lives sublime, and so departing leave behind us footsteps on the sands of time.

Thank you, Leonard, for such wonderful memories, and for teaching us things that often school, and even life could not. It’s not true to say that everything I learned I learned from Star Trek, but a hell of a lot I did, and it was all good. Your long Trek is over, my friend, may you rest in peace.

Live long, and prosper, in our memories and in our hearts.

It seemed a more humorous affectation than just going "*fist bump* B5 solidarity." Also, it's legal in 37 states!

Anyway, great Leonard Nimoy write-up, I almost teared up again.

Ok. I guess I'll have to return this ring! :laughing: Not legal here in Ireland yet, but it's moving in that direction. We have a referendum in a few months.

Thanks by the way: I wanted as I said to do something personal, not just carbon-copy what every major daily and news channel was writing; put down my memories of him and relate it more fully to Trek than any outside interests. I think it came out okay in the end.

As much as we’ve laughed at some of what I consider to be the poorer episodes in the franchise (plenty more to come!) the bulk of the episodes were really good, and a lot of them were actually great. This would of course have to be the case, otherwise even the original series would not have survived, and Star Trek as a whole contains some of the very best science-fiction, and indeed drama, writing, on television. Some episodes of course stand out head and shoulders above others, and these will be the ones I’ll be looking at here in this section. The times when the writing was spot-on, the acting perfect; plots that moved on or developed an overarching storyline or else stood alone but stood out from the crowd in so doing. The times when you would look at the series and say, yeah, this is what it’s all about. The times you would be proud to be a fan, and wonder what would come next. The times when the series rewarded its viewers and justified its presence on the air. In other words, the times they completely
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Title: The best of both worlds, part one
Series: TNG
Season: Three
Writer(s): Michael Piller
Main character(s): Picard, Riker
Plot: The feared enemy the Enterprise briefly encountered in the previous season’s “Q Who”, the relentless Borg, find their way to the Alpha Sector and begin destroying planets as they harvest lifeforms to assimilate. When the Federation opposes them, they assimilate Captain Picard and make him their tactical leader.

Forever the very best episode of TNG --- perhaps of all the series --- this episode reintroduced us to the Borg, a synthetic, robotic lifeform who all operate as one, like a beehive. They cannot be reasoned with, they cannot be bargained with, they cannot be defeated. Their ships are huge floating computers in the shape of massive cubes, and they begin to regenerate as soon as they take damage, as the Borg drones set about repairing their vessel. “The best of both worlds” is a two part episode, one of only a handful in TNG, but I prefer the first part as it builds up the tension; at first, we don’t know quite what’s happening on the colony that has been attacked, although this is a mystery that is quickly solved. Then there's the rivalry between Riker and Shelby, who plans to replace him after he has taken command of the new ship he has been offered, but he refuses the promotion.

We also get our first proper look at the inside of a Borg cube, near the end, and learn a little more about them when we see a Borg baby already hooked up to a computer. But our biggest shock is of course the assimilation of Picard, which ends the episode, and the season, as “Locutus of Borg” orders the Enterprise to surrender and escort them to Earth, Riker preparing to fire on the Borg cube.

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Title: Devil in the dark
Series: TOS
Season: One
Writer(s): Gene L. Coon
Main character(s): Kirk, Spock
Plot: Something is killing miners on Janus VI and the Enterprise is sent there to investigate. It turns out to be a creature who can burrow through solid rock, but there is a twist in the tale.

There’s so much I love about this episode. One of the first eco-friendly episodes, it takes the whole idea of a ruthless, savage attack and turns it completely on its head. From the title, we’re led to believe that what is on this planet is a horrible, deadly beast that wants to kill, but what we end up with is a mother fiercely protecting her young, and when unable to and they die, avenging them. Spock comes into his own here, the only one capable or open-minded enough to realise that the Horta may not be simply blindly killing, and he initiates a Vulcan mind meld with it --- I believe this is only the second time the telepathic communication is used --- to divine its intentions, eventually creating the framework for a peaceful and profitable coexistence between the miners and the aliens. Even the name of the planet is well chosen --- Janus being the two-faced god of the Romans, and this episode certainly having two sides to its story. The central theme, that we need not always judge a book by its cover and should seek violence only as a last resort, was one that Star Trek in its many incarnations returned to time and again.

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Title: Living witness
Series: VOY
Season: Four
Writer(s): Brannon Braga, Bryan Fuller and Joe Menosky
Main character(s): The Doctor
Plot: An alien museum in the future hosts an exhibition about Voyager, but it has all its facts terribly skewed. When the Doctor’s program is found and rerun, he sets the record straight but causes controversy as he challenges long-held beliefs.

As ever in this series, it’s an episode with the Doctor or Seven (occasionally both) that proves how good Voyager could be when they really tried. This episode truly stands out, even if its main premise is somewhat hijacked from Babylon 5’s “The deconstruction of falling stars”. Robert Picardo puts in as ever a flawless performance and proves that, like or even sometimes superceding Data, a non-human lifeform can often by more human than an actual one. Although he is only, in this episode, a backup copy of a hologrammatic simulation of a real man, he is still worried about the consequences revealing the actual truth about Voyager and the part the peoples of this planet played in its story will cause, and even at one point accepts he may be tried as a war criminal rather than bring this evidence to light.

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Title: The Visitor
Series: DS9
Season: Four
Writer(s): Michael Taylor
Main character(s): Jake Sisko
Plot: A young girl, a student who is considering a career in writing, arrives to speak to the reclusive writer, Jake Sisko, who is now quite old. When asked why he only write the one novel, Jake relates the tale of how his father died in a freak accident, or so they had thought. In fact, Sisko was trapped in an alternate dimension and Jake has spent the next few decades trying to bring him back. At the end, he realises he must die in order to save his father. The current timeline is erased when Sisko, on Jake’s advice, manages to avoid the discharge that “killed” him originally. It’s a beautiful little episode, based on a feeling of “what if” and showing the depth of love between the bioy and his son. Tony Todd shines in the role of elder Jake. Given all the Dominion stuff going on from season 4 onward, this is a quiet, personal but extremely poignant and powerful episode that shows why DS9 was regarded as the most mature and creative of the entire franchise.

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Title: Darmok
Series: TNG
Season: Five
Writer(s): Joe Menosky, Phillip LaZebnik
Main character(s): Picard
Plot: When the Enterprise encounters a race with whom communication appears to be impossible, Picard is transported to a nearby planet by the captain of the alien vessel, and they try to figure each other out, while also teaming up against a savage alien monster that plagues the planet.

An incredible example of how words are not always necessary for communication, somewhat similar in tone to season two's "Loud as a whisper". With gestures, hints and examples Picard learns enough of the language of his adversary to realise that he is not after all being challenged to single combat, but to stand with the alien captain against the monster on the planet. His attempts to understand what is going on, and the denouement, when he eventually returns to the ship and is able to converse with the aliens, are worth watching the episode for alone. A great character piece for Stewart, and the alien captain, played by Paul Winfield, does brilliantly as he tries to explain his language to the annoying human who insists on misinterpreting everything.

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Name: Risa
Alignment: Neutral, but a member of the Federation
Home to: Risian culture
Capital city: Nuvia
Orbital star: Epsilon Ceti B

If Ferenginar is a place you wouldn’t maroon your worst enemy, Risa is where the in-crowd go. Officially the holiday planet, it is able to boast controlled weather, which means that there are no nasty surprises waiting for you and you can be guaranteed a good holiday. Risa is also one of the most beautiful planets in the galaxy, having such features as Suraya Bay, where the villas are actually built into the cliffs that overlook the lake, Galartha, a rock face that changes pitch and handholds as you climb, subterranean gardens and Temtibi Lagoon, where it never rains thanks to the weather control.

If casual sex is more your thing though, you’ll go a long way before you find inhabitants as sexually permissive and adventurous as the Risians, who are always ready to make a newcomer feel welcome. Weapons are not allowed on the planet at all, so it’s also a very safe and law-abiding place. Surprisingly enough, Risa was not always the paradise it is today. Originally it could have rivalled the Ferengi homeworld for rain and high winds, and had little to recommend it. But through the employment of a sophisticated weather control system the Risians terraformed the planet and made it into the hot tourist resort it has become known as. Also interesting is the history behind Risa’s transformation, which mirrors the tale of Bugsy Siegal’s creation out of the desert of Las Vegas as the mecca of gambling.

A man named Arlo Leyven, on the run from the authorities, crashed on Risa and immediately saw its potential. He decided to make it the premier tourist spot in the galaxy, and borrowed heavily from the shady Orion Syndicate to finance the building of and use of the weather system that would turn Risa into a paradise and make him a very rich man in the process. He was however assassinated some time later and the planet itself was devastated by the Borg attack on the Alpha Quadrant. It has since been rebuilt and remains one of the most popular destinations in the galaxy for tourists.

I watched this episode with this girl I was going out with once. She cried at the end of it, and she hated Star Trek before that. Enough said, really. Absolutely classic episode, definitely one of the most moving and thought-provoking works of fiction I've ever come across.

So far as me and Trek go, I'm no hardcore fan, but I do love Next Gen and DS9. Voyager dropped the ball a bit, but had moments which were as good as anything in TNG or Deep Space (Living Witness, which I see you also wrote about, is probably my favourite episode of it). Apart from the Final Frontier, First Contact, Nemesis, the god-awful Into Darkness and the last two thirds of Insurrection, I really like the movies too.

Great-looking journal this...another one of yours I'm gonna need to play catch-up with :thumb:

Although in general we at The Couch Potato do not tend to concern ourselves overmuch with music, it is perhaps appropriate to look into the various themes and soundtracks that have attended the franchise over the decades, from the very first, original theme by Alexander Courage to the current updated ones for the reboot movies. Therefore I wish now to present to you
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At the bottom end of the scale, a theme not too well known --- indeed, a series not that well known either --- but which has a certain charm that appeals to me. It's basically just the original series's theme slightly altered, but I rather like it. So in at
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we have
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Name: Jake Sisko
Race: Human
Born: Earth
Assignment: Deep Space 9
Marital status: Single
Family: Captain Benjamin (Father), Jennifer (Mother, deceased), Joseph (Grandfather), Kasidy Yates (Stepmother)
Important episodes: A man alone, The Nagus, Babel, The Jem’Hadar, Civil defense, Explorers, Homefront, Paradise lost, Shattered mirror, Rapture, The Reckoning, Nor the battle to the strong, Call to arms, A time to stand, Sacrifice of angels, Behind the lines, Valiant, The Visitor, Tears of the Prophets, Shadows and symbols.

Quite young when he is uprooted from his home and transplanted to the space station Deep Space 9 with his father, Jakes moans about the inconvenience but soon realises he is in a spot envied by other kids his age, as the wormhole is discovered and he has a front row seat. Even so, Jake is a young boy and he does the things young boys do, ie get into trouble. Most of this is thanks to, or at least with the complicity and encouragement of Nog, Ferengi son of Rom, Quark’s cousin. The captain does not approve of the association, believing the Ferengi to be a bad influence on his son, but despite that --- or probably because of it --- the friendship thrives. Jake is with his father taking a break in the Gamma Quadrant when they encounter the first Vorta and soon after the Jem’Hadar. Jake and Nog manage to alert the station by flying the runabout back to friendly space.

Jake soon decides he does not wish to follow in his father’s footsteps; much more quickly than Wesley Crusher in TNG he comes to realise that a career in Starfleet, although expected of him and basically mapped out for him, is not the path he wishes to tread. Instead he turns his energies towards writing, cataloguing the events that occur at the station and later the unfolding of the Dominion War. Although she dies when he is eleven, Jake gets to meet his mother when she visits from the alternate universe and kidnaps him in order to force Captain Sisko to pursue her there and then help build a replica of the Defiant. Although he finds he has no stomach for fighting, he elects to remain behind when Deep Space 9 falls to the Dominion, in order to report the news of developments and, clandestinely, to help organise a resistance against the station’s occupying force.

In later life Jake became a famous writer, but he only ever wrote one novel. This occurred, however, in an alternate timeline that was destroyed when he managed to prevent his father dying, so whether it really happened or not is unknown.

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Vulcans

Class: Humanoid, pacifists
Home planet: Vulcan
Feature in: TOS, VOY, ENT
Values: Logic, calculating thought, peace, serenity, clear thinking, non-violence
Vulcans of note: Sarek, Surak, Spock, Tuvok, T’Pel, T’Pau

The polar opposite of the Klingons, Vulcans prefer the cold logic of the mathematic equation to the hot blood of the warrior, and are much happier in meditative contemplation than searching for worlds to conquer. Contrary to public belief, they do have emotions but have learned over the millennia to control them to such a degree that it often seems as if they do not have them. It is rare indeed to see a Vulcan smile, laugh, cry or get angry. They consider such “base displays of emotion” to be beneath them, distasteful and embarrassing, and in fact see them as illogical, the very antithesis to the core beliefs on which their society is founded. Vulcans share a common ancestry with the Romulans; both were part of the one race, but whereas one offshoot decided to pursue logic and rational thinking, and expunge emotion as far as possible from their world, the Romulans retained their warlike tendencies and split off from the mother race, making the planets Romulus and Remus their home worlds. Though they are essentially Vulcans, Romulans are shunned by Vulcans as they remind them of the path their entire race was heading down, and are an uncomfortable reminder of how all Vulcans could have ended up, were they not saved by the great thinker Surak and the freedom of logic.

However, because they refuse to show emotion Vulcans are looked on as cold and arrogant. Well, they kind of are: Vulcans don’t think they’re better than anyone else, they know they are. It is pure logic, as far as they see it. If they can resist being prodded, jabbed, angered, goaded where another race --- any race --- would lose its cool, then that makes them better. They’re certainly more intelligent, having devoted so much time to studying philosophy, arts, science and of course mathematics, and they’re not shy about showing it. In fact, Vulcans don’t show off: they simply do what they do and if others think that’s showing off then it means literally nothing to them. Their quiet, unruffled nature of course makes them perfectly suited to be mediators, ambassadors, negotiators. Vulcans however are almost totally pacifist; they abhor violence and even though they possess great physical strength will seldom ever use it. They do have a way of incapacitating an enemy without hurting them, something called a nerve pinch. This causes the subject to drop down unconscious, though for how long is unclear.

Vulcans were the first alien race humanity encountered, shortly after conducting their first warp speed test flight, and therefore the destinies of both races has always been tightly interwoven. Even so, few Vulcans have served in Starfleet, as the idea of military service is seen by the vast majority as a waste of a superior mind. Spock’s father, Sarek, always disagreed with his son’s decision to join Starfleet, and it was a source of bitterness (inasmuch as there can be bitterness between people who control their emotions so rigidy) and distance between them up until Spock’s rebirth after giving his life to save the USS Enterprise. Vulcans seldom intermarry, but Sarek fell in love with a human woman, and married her. This then made Spock half-human, and therefore something of an outcast in his society growing up. Having human heritage did however give Spock a unique insight into humans, and helped him to work better with these emotional creatures.

Despite their logic --- or perhaps because of it --- Vulcans are very spiritual and believe in the resurrection of the body, as well as certain gods. They attend to their mysticism and worship with the same stoic, unemotional dedication they apply to learning, or studying. Women seem to have equal standing in their society, probably because it is after all illogical to differentiate between the sexes, and as Spock points out to his captain at one juncture, they have no egos to bruise. Because emotion colours speech, all Vulcans speak in a calm, unhurried tone and seldom betray any expression beyond perhaps the raising of an eyebrow.

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#1: Spock tells his wife and her lover to fuck off. In traditional Vulcan style, of course!
Spock returns to his home planet to fight for his mate, being in the throes of Pon Far, the Vulcan mating cycle which induces in him a blood fury. He is told by his wife, T'Pring
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that there is a challenger for her heart and he must fight for her. He prepares to engage in combat with Stonn, his rival.
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But T'Pring is clever; she can choose her champion and she does not choose Stonn, but Captain Kirk, who then has to fight his first officer.
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and believing that he has actually killed Kirk, Spock returns to the Enterprise, leaving his scheming wife with the result she wanted. Before he goes though he pwns them both:
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"Flawlessly logical", he compliments T'Pring, when she has explained her plan,that "if you won, you would not want me, and so you would leave, but Stonn would still be here. If your captain won, he would not want me and so he would leave, and there would still be Stonn." She inclines her head at the perceived compliment, but I personally believe that Spock was actually insulting her, telling her that she was unable to see beyond logic, as he has sometime managed, and more, has used logic to furnish her with the outcome she wanted.

He then turns to Stonn and says, "She is yours. You may find, after a time, that wanting and having are not the same thing."
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ZING! Fuck you, Stonn! You can have the bitch! I am OUT of here! Laters bitches!
Luckily, when he gets back to the ship he finds Kirk is not dead, and loses control of his emotions for a moment. Ah, bless!

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Counsellor Deanna Troi, played by Marina Sirtis

With a new ship, a new series and a new way to look at things, TNG created the position of Ship’s Counsellor, a role that had never existed before. Basically part therapist, part almost nanny to the ship’s crew, it is Deanna Troi’s job to ensure the mental well-being of those who serve aboard NCC-1701D, and most crew members would schedule or have scheduled for them regular sessions. She is also very good with children, as she has to be, with the Enterprise carrying families into space. She is part Betazoid, a race of telepathic humanoids, and her telepathy gives her a unique advantage in her field, as she can sense when people are worried, not telling the truth, hiding something etc. She is however more than just a shrink, carrying the rank of Lieutenant Commander, and a bridge officer. Her talents are too precious to waste and so Picard makes use of them whenever he can. It’s always useful, for instance, to know if the ship facing off against you is actually going to risk opening hostilities, or if the captain is bluffing.

Troi goes down to the surface on away missions more than other female officers; again, she could be vital in any situation, as we see in the pilot episode when she detects the creature at Farpoint and its loneliness. She has been romantically involved with Commander Riker, though this seems to be in the past now. Nevertheless, when they are alone she often refers to him as “Imzadi”, or beloved, and it sometimes seems as if they have unfinished business. In the event though she falls for Worf, helping him to look after his son before he leaves the Enterprise and finds love with Jadzia Dax. In the final “proper” Star Trek movie, “Nemesis”, she is shown as having married Riker. She is a strong female role model, but perhaps mindful of the miniskirt-and-boots era of TOS, the producers of TNG originally give her an unflattering tight bun hairdo and a purple catsuit to wear, before she is eventually allowed to gracefully blossom into an attractive but independent young lady later in the series.

She maintains a close but always platonic relationship with Reginald Barclay, a transporter engineer whose shyness she helps him overcome, and is one of Data’s friends. Picard values her counsel but rarely if ever uses her first name, and of course she is very friendly with the other strong female on the ship, its doctor and chief medical officer; they often work out together and have dinner. She has the dubious distinction of being the only person --- never mind female --- to have crashed the Enterprise and destroyed its saucer section. Her mother in the series is Lwaxanna Troi, played by the late Majel Barrett-Roddenberry, who turns up from time to time in the various series. She learns, in the episode “Dark page”, that she once had a sister but that the child drowned, and her mother has or had blocked this memory out so completely that she had managed to convince herself she had only one daughter ever. Deanna’s father was a Starfleet officer, killed in action when she was little.

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Let's check in now on some of the stars of TNG and see how time has treated them...

Patrick Stewart (Captain Picard)
Then

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Now

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Jonathan Frakes (Riker)
Then

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Now

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Brent Spiner (Data)
Then

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Now

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Marina Sirtis (Troi)
Then

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Now

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Coming soon to Star Trek Month: the battle everyone wants to see!
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"Jim, cancel those Orion Slave Girls! I've just sorted the entertainment for the Christmas party!"
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As mentioned some time ago, the first movies I want to review are all of the Star Trek ones, so obviously much of that was going to happen here, this month. I've no chance of getting through them all, but I can tell you I've done the first four. Whether I manage any more before the end of the month is debatable but we'll see.

For now, sit back, enjoy the view of space from the viewscreen, pop your quantum headphones on and enjoy the ride!
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Title: Star Trek: The Motion Picture
Released: 1979
Writer(s): Alan Dean Foster/ Harold Livingston
Director: Robert Wise
Starring: All the usual Star Trek crew plus: Stephen Collins as Willard Decker, Persis Khambhatta as Ilia
Runtime: 132 minutes
Budget: USD 46 million
Boxoffice: USD 134 million
Critical acclaim: Very low
Fan acclaim: Very low
Legacy: First in the franchise, but quickly forgotten about.
Enterprise: NCC-1701

Finally convinced they had killed the goose that laid the golden egg when they had cancelled the original Star Trek series in 1969, and having seen its phenomenal success in syndication all over the world, Paramount decided to cash in on this and began plans to revive the series, but changed their minds in 1978 and went for a movie release instead. This is not hard to understand. The late seventies had seen movies such as Alien, Star Wars and Close Encounters coin it in, and make a mockery of the belief that sci-fi was just for geeks and losers. Smashing box-offices all over the world, it seemed science-fiction and space opera was here to stay, and you could buy your next beachfront property if you hedged your bets in that area. And so in 1978 filming began on what would be the first live-action reincarnation of Star Trek since the original series was cancelled.

What resulted, sadly, was a critical and creative failure, although it did pull in the box-office receipts. It does have to be stressed though that most of those who went to see the film more than likely did so because it was after all the first Star Trek movie. There are no records for film-goers who went to see it and were disappointed: you couldn't demand your money back at the end. Not that it was that bad. But it was. Listen to this:

A huge alien energy cloud is headed for Earth, and is surprisingly immune to the photon torpedoes three Klingon warships throw at it, destroying them all in the process, and also taking out one of the Federation's monitoring stations on the way. Spock, on pilgrimage to Vulcan, is about to reach Kolinahr, the state prized by his people in which total control of their emotions is achieved, but just as the culmination of his labours arrives and he is about to be presented with the symbol of total logic, something distracts him. He hears a call from out in space, and the high priestess realises he is listening to his human emotions, and that he is not yet ready. Back on Earth, at Starfleet Headquarters an older but perhaps not necessarily wiser Admiral James Kirk demands to take command of his old ship, which is being refitted and will soon be ready to be launched on its first mission. There is one problem though: the USS Enterprise already has a captain, one Willard Decker, and he is not happy about handing over the captain's chair.

There are many new crew members, but when Lieutenant Ilia, a Deltan, boards, it is clear that she and Decker have history, although she mentions a vow of celibacy. En route, another crewmember joins them. It is Spock, but if they expected a tearful reunion the crew are to be disappointed, as the Vulcan is, if possible, even less friendly and more aloof than before. He is however able to help Scotty repair and recalibrate the engines, after Kirk had foolishly demanded warp speed too soon, taking them into a wormhole and nearly destroying the ship, certainly damaging the engines. Spock tells Kirk and McCoy that he began sensing a powerful intelligence while on Vulcan, an exceedingly logical being, and believes that his answers, which he was unable to find while on his home planet, may lie within the entity they are approaching.

With his help, the Enterprise makes it to the cloud while it is still one day away from Earth, whereupon they are scanned, and Spock says he believes there is an object at the heart of the cloud. He also detects a feeling of surprise, that they have not responded, having been contacted. Kirk refrains from assuming a defensive posture, in case this is misinterpreted by the cloud (or whatever is at its heart) as a hostile act, but when they are attacked he has no choice. Spock manages to modify their communications to allow them to send messages of friendship the entity can understand and interpret, and the attack is broken off. For now. Needing to make contact with whatever is inside the cloud, Kirk has little alternative but to order the ship to enter the cloud, despite the danger and the uncertainty. On doing so, they do indeed find an object inside; seems to be some sort of alien spacecraft. As they hold position over the craft they are suddenly probed. Spock tries to shut off the ship's computer, as the probe is running their databanks, but the probe attacks him. Next it goes for Ilia, vapourising her and then disappearing. The Enterprise is drawn inside the alien craft.

Suddenly there is a security alert and they rush to find that Liuetenant Ilia has returned. Or not quite. Her form is that of the Deltan, but the voice speaks with a mechanical monotone, and McCoy and Spock confirm it is a probe from the alien vessel, merely taking the form of Ilia, the better to communicate with them. It says it is from V'ger, and wishes to study “the carbon-based lifeforms infesting the Enterprise.” That's them: Kirk, Spock, Scotty, the whole crew. Carbon-based lifeforms. That's us. The probe tells them it is heading towards Earth in order to merge with “the Creator”, but when Kirk tries to dig deeper he gets no further explanation. He sets Decker to chaperone the probe, as he was involved with Ilia, and the probe tells him that once it has completed its examination it will “reduce all carbon units to data packets.” Doesn't sound too good for the crew of NCC-1701! Meanwhile, Spock goes out of the ship to penetrate into the inner chamber of the vessel, a risky manoeuvre but he finds inside some sort of digital holographic record of all the planets and places this V'Ger has visited. He believes it is not a vessel after all now, but a living being.

He finds a pulsing sensor at the centre of the chamber and believing it to be some sort of conduit for the intelligence driving the alien, tries to mind-meld with it, but it literally blows his mind and he floats, unconscious, until Kirk, who has gone out after him, finds him and brings him back to the ship. He tells Kirk that the alien, V'ger, is a probe from a world populated by living machines, is incapable of understanding emotion, and is going through what can only be described as an existential crisis, as it seeks to discover if this is all there is to its existence? The cloud is now almost within reach of Earth, and V'ger begins sending an old-style radio signal --- a message to its creator, which it expects to be answered. When no reply is forthcoming, the vessel, entity or whatever it is sets up powerful weapons arrays above the planet, after having knocked out all defensive systems, as it prepares to scour the Earth of life.

In a desperate ploy to save his home planet (and his own life; they're next obviously) Kirk tells the probe that he knows why the signal has not been responded to, why the creator has not replied, but he will only disclose this information on two conditions: one, the orbiting devices must be removed from around the planet, and two, he must give the information directly to V'ger. He and Spock have realised that if the probe takes them to the central processor unit of the vessel, they should be able to deactivate the devices. The probe agrees, but the devices will only be removed after Kirk has disclosed the required information. V'ger learns fast! And so they are taken into the machine, where with the benefit of an oxygen atmosphere being provided we are treated to the first ever instance of the crew walking on the saucer section of the Enterprise outside.

What they find solves the mystery. A huge alien probe, and at its heart an old Earth one, Voyager VI. V'Ger is Voyager, and it is trying to transmit its collected data back to Earth, its creator. It was launched three hundred years ago, but now has been sent back by the inhabitants of the machine world, and is trying to fulfil its mission. But it can't, as there is nobody left on Earth who knows the transmission code that will allow it to send its data. Kirk has Uhura look it up and they send the code, but V'Ger does not receive it, having intentionally (apparently) burned out the wires that make the connection with its receiver. It wants to literally join with the creator, whom it now sees as Decker, with Ilia the probe. So Decker will after all get his end away and Ilia's vow of celibacy is about to be broken in the most spectacular fashion!

Decker puts in the transmission sequence manually and he and Ilia the probe are surrounded by light as they join and science goes out the window under total Star Trek technobabble. The cloud, the probe, the orbiting devices all disappear and the day is saved as the Enterprise comes out triumphantly, having once again saved the day.

QUOTES
Kirk (on taking over the captaincy): “I'm sorry Will.”
Decker: “No, sir, I don't believe you are. I don't believe you're sorry one bit, Admiral. I remember when I took command of the Enterprise you told me how envious you were, and how you hoped to get a command yourself. Well, sir, it looks like you found a way.”
(Considering he has not asked for permission to speak freely, this could go down on Decker's record as insubordination. He is, after all, talking to a superior officer in a very belligerent and familiar way).

McCoy: “The admiral invoked a little-known, seldom-used clause called a reactivation order. In simpler language, they drafted me.”
Kirk: “They didn't.”
McCoy: “This was your idea?”
Kirk: “Bones, there's a ... thing out there ...”
McCoy: “Why is any object we don't understand always called a thing?”
Kirk: “It's headed this way. I need you. Damn it Bones: I need you! Badly!”
(You'd have to wonder at the validity of this. After all, McCoy is a doctor, this is a cloud measuring tens of atmospheric units across. What's he gonna do? Diagnose it?)

Decker: “Permission to speak freely sir?”
Kirk: “Granted.”
Decker: “You haven't logged a star hour in over two and a half years, sir. That, plus your unfamiliarity with this ship and its redesign, in my opinion sir, seriously jeopardises this mission.”

Kirk: “Full sensor scan, Mr. Spock. They can't expect us not to look them over now.”
Decker: “Not now we're looking right down their throats.”
Kirk: “Right. Now that we have them just where they want us.”

Kirk: “Where's Lieutenant Ilia?”
Probe: “That unit no longer functions.”
(Oh. What an epitaph for the Deltan officer: Here lies Lt. Ilia, of the USS Enterprise. She no longer functions.)

Kirk: “Who is the creator?”
Probe: “The creator is that which created V'ger.”
Kirk: “And who is V'ger?”
Probe: “V'ger is that which was made by the creator .”
(Circular logic at its best!)

Decker: “Within that shell are the memories of ... a certain carbon unit. If I could help you to revive those memories it might help you understand our function better.”
Probe: “That is logical. You may proceed.”
(Howay ya lad ya! ;))

Spock: “Captain, V'ger is a child. I suggest you treat it as such.”
Kirk: “A child?”
Spock: “Yes captain. A child. Learning, evolving, searching. Instinctively needing.”
Decker: “Needing what?”
McCoy: “Spock, this child is about to wipe out every living thing on Earth! What do you suggest we do: spank it?”

Kirk (as Decker prepares to manually input the signal): “Decker, don't!”
(It's such a sincere request; Kirk obvously sees his main competitor for the command of Enterprise about to be removed from the game, and he can't wait. He might as well have said “Yeah go on, do it.”)

Kirk: “Mister Sulu, ahead, warp one.”
Sulu: “Warp one, captain. Heading?”
Kirk: “Out there. Thataway.”
(I don't think you'll find this in the Starfleet manual of operations, Kirk me old chum!)

Questions?

Why does at least one of the Klingon warships not hit warp and get the fuck out of there when they see how powerful the alien cloud is? I know, I know: Klingons never run, but have they never read Sir John Falstaff? I mean, come on! They are clearly up against a vastly superior power, and as any commander worth his salt knows, it is no shame to retreat in the face of either overwhelming odds or from an enemy who has you completely outmatched. Besides, won't the Klingon High Command, to say nothing of the homeworld itself, need to be warned, apprised of the danger? Isn't this one time where a bit of brains should triumph over chest-beating brawn? But no: they instead fire --- with one of the ships already vapourised in seconds before their eyes --- three photon torpedoes at an entity which has already proven immune to such weapons. Are these guys idiots?

Kirk mentions that “the only starship in range of the cloud is the Enterprise”. But they're at Starfleet fucking headquarters! Are we supposed to believe that there is no other warship, starship or cruiser docked there, that the only ship moored there of consequence is NCC-1701? Seems at best unlikely.

Why does Kirk demand to be in command? Sure, we need it for the movie, but in reality, is there any justification for this? Decker knows the ship inside out, he's a competent captain. Why does Kirk think he is the only one who can complete the mission? Is he that arrogant? Don't answer. Seems to me he may just have grabbed at his only chance to get his own command again, particularly the one ship he would have wanted. A little petty? The needs of the one outweighing the needs of the many?

Spock mentions that, while inside V'ger, he saw the alien's home planet, a “planet populated by living machines”. He refers to them as “cold”, using “pure logic”. An early template for that later scourge of the galaxy, the Borg?

Memorable scenes and effects
The energy cloud is done well, but basically it's, well, a cloud with a lot of colours and things floating in it. My main plaudits have to go to the initial approach as Kirk and Scotty see the Enterprise for the first time in the movie --- I remember the lump in my throat when I saw that the first time too. After all, remember, this was the very first glimpse for us of a ship we had see carry Kirk and his crew through three seasons of television adventure, and we thought we would never see it again. A special moment. The sequence is perhaps overextended and a little indulgent, but you can forgive them for that. The scene where they leave spacedock is also very impressive.

Kirk's hubris
Never a man to listen to others when his mind is made up, Kirk is well known for pushing the limits and taking often unnecessary risks. Here, I'll be charting the moments when his overconfidence is his undoing, putting his crew and others in potential danger.

As they leave Earth, Kirk demands warp power immediately, even though everyone from Decker to Scotty advise against it: more simulation time is needed. The ship is untested, having just undergone a complete refit, and they should not be pushing things. Kirk, however, as usual listens to nobody, with the result that they nearly end up colliding with a wormhole in space and ending their mission before it has even begun. He is forced into an embarrassing climbdown, and it won't be the last time he has to admit he was wrong, or at least too hasty in ordering something. Also, while in the wormhole they encounter an object in their path. With helm unresponsive, they can't avoid it and Kirk orders phasers to fire, but Decker, knowing the new ship better, countermands the order and uses the photon torpedoes instead.

Themes and motifs
Certainly the theme of homecomings is evident here, and not surprisingly so. This is, after all, the return of Star Trek to the screen, albeit the big one too. But apart from that, it's a sort of homecoming for Kirk, who has been flying a desk for some years now and has almost forcibly changed that to ensure he has returned to the captain's chair. V'ger has its own sort of homecoming, returning to the planet from which it was launched, although certainly it comes back a changed probe, with a somewhat skewed idea of its mission! It's also a return for Decker and Ilia, as they meet again after an unspecified but not hard to guess at liaison on her home planet.

There's a theme too, though, I feel, of helplessness. Kirk feels helpless as an admiral, unable to take command of a starship as he has been used to, until he forces Starfleet's hand and convinces them to give him his old ship back. Helpless describes Decker, relieved of command and now subservient to a man he does not like, and whom, he knows, is angling for permanent command of the Enterprise. The Earth is helpless before the attack of V'Ger, and even V'ger is, to some extent, helpless, as it tries to work out what it is supposed to be doing, and how it is to do it.

Parallels
The plotline follows basically the same as a TOS episode called “The changeling”, in which an Earth probe returns, having collided with an alien probe, and, well, goes a bit loopy. Essentially, Kirk does the same here as he did there (or tries to): pretends he is the one the probe is seeking.

The relationship between Decker and Ilia, or at least their initial reunion, is mirrored almost exactly by the same scene in TNG when Riker and Troi meet on the Enterprise.

And isn’t that…?
Two cameos at the beginning of the movie for Grace Lee Whitney, returning as Janice Rand, promoted after all this time from Yeoman to Commander, who handles the disastrous transport of Sovak and another crewman, the fault in the teleporter resulting in their grisly deaths. The commander of Epsilon 9 monitoring station is none other than the late Mark Lenard, who played the Romulan commander in “Balance of terror” but is best known for playing Spock’s father, Sarek, in both TOS and TNG. He later returns as Sarek in the third movie.

Does this movie deserve its reputation?
Here I'll be looking at what is generally thought of the movie, good bad or indifferent. Does it deserve the plaudits, or indeed the derision it has earned over the years? Having watched it fresh, perhaps for the first time in a very long time, is my mind altered on how I originally received it, or does it still rock/suck, or is it still meh, or even a case of the jury being out?

The basic reputation this movie has is perhaps best encapsulated in a title my brother once jeeringly gave it, calling it “Star Trek: The Slow Motion Picture”. And he's not wrong. It's a terribly plodding, dull, uneventful movie. When you look at the later ones in the franchise, you can see how they must have agreed. There's very little action here, and no space battles at all. The only other vessels we see really, other than V'Ger, are the Klingons and they're gone within the first three minutes of the movie's opening. There's little too of the famed easy friendship between the main characters: Kirk is stilted and uptight, knowing he has overstepped his authority at least morally, in taking command of the ship and secretly unsure if he's still up to the job. Spock is even less human, having been on pilgrimage to Vulcan, and McCoy is, well, McCoy, but he's worried about Kirk. Scotty is fine, but then Scotty will always be Scotty.

The plot is wafer-thin. As I said above, it's basically cobbled from ideas taken from “The Changeling” and what was to have been the pilot for the new series, which was cancelled. It also has some elements of “2001” about it, but the resolution is ridiculous, and jumps right off the science-fiction trail into the woods of magic and sorcery. There is no scientific explanation as to why Decker suddenly becomes one with V'Ger after inputting the code, and why a new lifeform results. It might as well be magic, and it's a stupid, lazy ending. Had it ended as it should have, with V'Ger transmitting its message and Earth being saved, that would have been okay, but this pseudo-psychological mumbo-jumbo about creatures joining because someone fuses two wires.... bah!

The thing is that up to then there's very little that happens, and like a certain point in later “Generations”, when a friend at work confessed to me that she fell asleep during the scene that explained what was going on, the whole thing is very boring. It survives on one real pretext only, and that is that it was the first of the Trek movies. Everyone wanted to see the gang again, everyone was eager to see the Enterprise in action, and because of that it got what can only be described as a pass. I'd venture to bet that a very large percentage of those who went to see it came out bewildered and disappointed. In the “Questions?” section I laughed at the contention that there were no other starships in the vicinity of their fucking home base (!) but now have to ask what the hell were Starfleet doing while Kirk and Co rode to save the day? When the Enterprise, within the V'Ger cloud, gets back to Earth they still haven't launched any ships, called any back to assist in the defence of the homeworld? They're pinning all their hopes on NCC-1701, just waiting?

I'm also quite disappointed in the soundtrack. I didn't know it at the time of course, but it's basically the theme for TNG, note for note, with the odd nod back to the original theme and a few heavy bass or guitar notes when V'ger comes on the scene. Very poor. If I had to pick out things that could have saved the movie, or at least areas that impressed me, the launch of the Enterprise, the transporter accident and maybe the trip through the wormhole. That's about it. Not much in a movie that's over two hours long.

So yeah, at the end, I feel this does deserve its poor reputation. It's almost like the writers weren't trying, or maybe were trying to hard, and fell somewhere in between. The movie was overall quite boring, no real action, too wordy and without question, if she fell asleep during “Generations” then Helen would have been snoozing about ten minutes after this began. Thankfully it was the last such poor movie, and they totally upped their game for the next one. But as a debut for the film franchise it leaves a whole lot to be desired.

Therefore, having taken everything into account and approaching this both from a fresher and more informed perspective, all I can award this first Star Trek movie is a poor
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Cardassians

Class: Humanoid, warlike
Home planet: Cardassia Prime
Values: Stealth, cunning, treachery, strategy, betrayal, brutality, lack of mercy
Cardassians of note: Gul Dukat, Elim Garak, Enabran Tain, Tret Akleen, Gul Damar
Featured in: DS9

A warrior race like the Klingons, the Cardassians are more brutal in that they do not prize honour. In fact, in their society the most underhand and treacherous rise to the top, and in that they are probably comparable to Nazis. They wear full body armour at all times, and have just recently been defeated (they would say decided to pull out) after the fifty-year-long occupation of Bajor, whose citizens they treated as subhuman slaves. They are a military society, ruled by the Cardassian Central Command but more accurately by their intelligence arm, the shadowy and feared Obsidian Order. Cardassia is a police and military state, where even the slightest hint of disaffection is greeted with instant arrest and possible subsequent disappearance. No Cardassian trusts another, and this constant air of paranoia helps the Order to keep control of and over its people, as well as affording it the opportunity to remove any elements it deems “inappropriate”, which is to say, threatening its power.

Cardassians are not happy about their retreat from Bajor, but like the Centauri in Babylon 5, the guerilla war against them by the indigenous population became too costly to support, and anyway they had strip-mined the planet to the point of exhaustion and starvation so there was little left for them to occupy. When the Federation went to war with the Dominion, the Cardassian Empire joined the latter, fighting against Starfleet. With a small rebel force building among the Cardassians, the tide was turned and the Cardassians turned on their former allies (a typically Cardassian thing to do!). However, although they prevailed, they paid a high price and were never again the proud, conquering arrogant race they had been. Cardassians are possibly unique in being the only race that feature in only one series, Deep Space 9. They are mentioned in passing in Voyager, and I don’t care about Enterprise but I doubt it as it’s set way before anyone encountered them. Actually they’re not the only ones, but even so it’s a little odd that they are so inextricably tied into DS9.

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Every hero needs his nemesis, every goody needs his baddy and although in the Trekverse there is little in the way of arch-enemies, there are a few who crop up more than once. Star Trek as a franchise though is built more around evolving storylines than your average superhero movies, which tend to bring back in the same opponents time and again, or even the likes of Doctor Who, where you cant move without bumping into a shipfull of daleks or a Cyberman army hidden away.

Nevertheless, when Star Trek has bad guys, or girls, they're usually pretty damn good. So to speak.

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Kai Winn Adami, played by Louise Fletcher
Originally a lowly vedek, Winn ascended to power after the death of Kai Opaka and by manipulating a series of half-truths that discredited the other candidate. Once in power (and even before she gains the seat) Winn proves to be an arrogant, militant leader who wants nothing to do with the Federation. She is jealous that an alien (Sisko) has received visions from her Prophets and become their emissary, a situation that leads her into constant conflict with Sisko, both as the Emissary and as commander and later captain of Deep Space 9. In her desire for power she unwittingly allies herself with a Cardassian-funded separatist movement, and later with the Cardassians themselves, through the disguise effected by Gul Dukat. She is instrumental in his almost taking power in Bajor and releasing the evil spirits known as the Pah-Wraiths, but eventually atones somewhat for her misdeeds by trying to stop Dukat, before he disintegrates her.

So, Romulans vs. Cardassians. Which is the most evil?

Cardassians I think. They're brutal, whereas Romulans are more kind of casually cruel. Based on the Romans, obviously, they're not actually sadistic, whereas the Cardassians, more based as I said on the Nazis, are. So the Cardassians would get my vote every time. Interesting question though? Anyone else any thoughts?
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It's obvious isn't it.

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