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Chapter Three: Dude Whoa Back outside the walls of the Castle of Music Banterus, things are starting to get weird... Yorkius: Yo, Gloofe, are those shrooms we scored from Christophe the other day kicking in yet? Gloofe: I...uh...fluff.......blob...steam engines Yorkius: Meh, amateurs. Do you think we should mess with him, Trolldalf? Trolldalf: Wait, you guys are on shrooms right now?! Yorkius: We took them about half an hour ago, you just happened to show up right after. It appears Gloofe is having a rough go of things Gloofe: What happened to Mercury?! Why is it no longer a planet?! Trolldalf: Goodness! Why aren't you acting like that? Yorkius: Hey there's no telling what will happen to me. Maybe it'll take longer for me to feel the effects. In the meantime, why don't you poof something out of thin air to freak him out? Trolldalf: I only use my magical powers for good, not for jokes on someone who's tripping balls! Yorkius: Ugh fine, maybe Sexo has something funny for him to look at. Sexo's Porn Shack is right over here, let's go have a gander. Sexo: If it's porn you need, I have it in droves! Be sure to read my weekly review column on all the latest releases. Yorkius: Give us something especially perverse, we...I mean I'm trying to fuck with Gloofe over here. Sexo: Ah yes, I have just the thing. Here's one of my favorites from last year: Woman With Six Mouths Gives Oral Upside Down While Riding a Unicorn. It's an independent release with low production values, but the talent behind this cannot be understated! Yorkius: Ah yes, that sounds wonderffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff fffffuck what's going on?! Trolldalf, your hat! It's doing the Electric Slide on your head! Trolldalf: What's that? My hat is sitting still as it always does! Gloofe: Damn it! I'm trying to do a somersault but I can't! Trolldalf: You're just laying in the fetal position for goodness sakes! Yorkius: Hey whoa now, let's think about this logically. If the universe is finite, does that mean I can actually be a walrus if I dream about it hard enough? Sexo: What in the actual fuck is going on here? Christophe: Oh look, they took my shrooms! Trolldalf: Ah, if it isn't Lord Christophe von Frowninghymen VII, I trust you were sent here by Ki? Christophe: Yes, I was told to find you at the Castle. There is supposedly a large meeting to be had later tonight. Sexo: What's this about a meeting? Why was I not made aware of this?...and why is Gloofe trying to gnaw on my leg?! Gloofe: We gotta.......trim.....the fat Yorkius: Christophe, if I ripped off your mustache and ate it would I harness your powers?? Trolldalf: Uh...Sexo, I'm afraid this planned meeting is top secret and only a select few chosen warriors may attend. Sexo: Ah, fair enough. You know me, all I need is porn, porn, and more porn! Just then, a guttural howl was heard from off in the distance... ?????: I'm....gonna....kick....his....ass! Sexo: The hell was that? Christophe: Who knows? Let's just get to that meeting. We'll have to drag these two bozos with us. Yorkius: Whoa whoa whoa, don't forget the porn! Gloofe: Hurry! We...we gotta hurry! The flapjacks! They're coming! -------------------------------- To be continued.................... |
I do like my porn.
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Great so far - I'm curious how/if I'm going to come into play hah
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It'll probably be about a week before I can get more of this written
Just letting people know that I haven't given up already :P |
If you don't finish this, I'm banning you on principle.
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I second the motion.
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Why am I banging Trollheart when I think all would agree I should be banging Sansa?
That being said, let this live forever. Theres a few cameos that haven't been made yet that should. |
Oops. Meant Batlord. Sucks being the only chick metal fan, they always throw you to the wolves....
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