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Old 08-20-2016, 12:21 AM   #51 (permalink)
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Whoops.
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Old 01-20-2017, 12:20 AM   #52 (permalink)
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I find that the only reasonable time to actually use Musicbanter is when I'm high as ****.
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Old 06-07-2018, 02:55 AM   #53 (permalink)
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I completely forgot about this thread. I'll just make this my go to film review thread since that's what I mostly did on here anyways.

The Lobster

The Lobster comes from none other than Greek auteur Yorgos Lanthimos, the helmer of a little indie flick by the name of Dogtooth. Nominated for best foreign language film at the time and a movie that highlighted glaring idiosyncrasies Lanthimos would surely flesh out over time. What made Dogtooth stand out though was his ability to take such an absurd meticulous plot and weave some allegory into it. What it all meant I'm still trying to decipher myself. Then that moment. That moment where some blood gets shed. It was painful to watch, yet tame in the sense that much harsher brutality has been filmed before. It stood out though because of his ability to even take it to such lengths and not shy away from a necessary progression to the story. That's why Dogtooths brilliant, and that's exactly why The Lobster's even better.

Colin Farrell plays a man that essentially is bound to this rehab sort of facility and must find a lover within 6 weeks or else they will transform him into a Lobster, the animal he chose for himself. What transpires in the ensuing 2 hours is strangely even stranger than turning humans into animals. Each performance is very robotic, especially Farrell. His deadpan delivery makes this anxious film even more stressful. Admittedly, as much as a love or hate relationship you might have with the story, the most impressive attribute is the cinematography. The look and color of this film is extremely impressive. Surprised he wasn't nominated because frankly, it's one of the most well shot films I've ever watched. To see what an achievement it is and also get a hysterical absurdist story out of it is a testament to how great this director is. I felt like every shot of a hallway or even some of the slow-motion scenes in the woods meant something greater than what I was watching. Very Kubrick like techniques in play and done smart enough to put a stamp on it as his own.

What can be said that hasn't already been said. It's a Lanthimos film, which at this point in his career means you know what you're getting yourself into before you press play. And I wouldn't have it any other way. This is a stroke of arthouse genius that begs to be talked about for many many years. A
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Old 06-07-2018, 07:25 AM   #54 (permalink)
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Now watch The Street Fighter.
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Old 06-07-2018, 01:25 PM   #55 (permalink)
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Now watch The Street Fighter.
Lol no thanks. I'll be reviewing "Under The Shadow" soon. Iranian ghost story that's pretty horrifying. Also on Netflix check it out.
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I converted to Islam today.

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Old 06-08-2018, 06:44 PM   #56 (permalink)
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Under The Shadow

Under The Shadow is an Iranian horror film that slowly builds it's terror through the lens of the devastation plaguing the middle east for decades now. It never shies away from the fear and anger these people have been living with for some their whole lives. I must warn you though, that's not even the most terrifying part. To avoid any spoilers, let's just say there's some other-worldly activities at play here. Narges Rashidi is a mother who tries to pursue her college career again but is denied due to her revolutionary background. On top of this stress, her husband is sent to the army to fight and her daughter starts to notice something her mother doesn't. Something no one can see. Something that led to me changing my pants halfway through. I'm lying, I just had to change my underwear. What transpires throughout the duration of this hour and a half film is painfully frightening.

It builds slowly the first act of the film, but throughout it eventually builds a taut creeping dread that seeps into every shot. The score starts to build tension till the very end and some moments had me gasping for air. I'd forgot to breathe in certain scenes, that's how much nail-biting tension is skillfully placed. The editing, the writing, the acting, all top-tier stuff.

All In All, Under The Shadow is a ghost story worth watching, and re-watching, and if it doesn't scare the lights out of you, you might have balls of steel. Also, there's a moment where the lead actress is looking through a window. I don't have anything to say if that scene doesn't freak you out, I already know it will. A-
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I converted to Islam today.

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saw LeBron James downtown but then I realized I'm just racist
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Old 06-09-2018, 07:38 AM   #57 (permalink)
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Lol no thanks.
I've got five reasons why you should binge all of the Street Fighter movies:









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Old 06-09-2018, 01:24 PM   #58 (permalink)
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I've got five reasons why you should binge all of the Street Fighter movies:









I thought those X-ray shots are strictly Mortal Kombat property? I'm still not convinced.
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I love how you edited your post to officially out me out of the closet?" It's like you asked yourself if you were a big enough cunt in the post, concluded that you weren't, and added it in to satisfy your postly cunt quota
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I converted to Islam today.

Allah Supreme.
A Love Supreme.
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saw LeBron James downtown but then I realized I'm just racist
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Old 07-15-2018, 04:05 AM   #59 (permalink)
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The Devil's Candy

The minute I end a film, the outright best compliment I can offer is declaring it so unique that nothing like it compares and nothing probably ever will. The influence you can tell early on will ripple throughout future generations. Exceptionally grounded, standing firmly on it's two legs. The kind of filmgoing experience that creates hope for the genre. Films like The Descent, Evil Dead, The Exorcist, and more recently Hereditary. Showcasing a competence in horror filmmaking. The future of horror films looks bright enough, but said films have kept this hell train still achug alugging.

The Devil's Candy very much holds that spirit. A heavy metal family who've worked hard to buy a house celebrate the occasion until they begin to get harassed by a man who very much suffers from an extreme form of mental illness. Without spoiling shit, the opening scene of this film sets the tone so perfectly well, I knew right away it to be something treasured. It at that moment made me question who directed it, and sure enough it's the aussie dude who made The Loved Ones, another hidden gem of humorous brutality. If you're aware of this particular film but continues to skip it on your Netflix queue, you're doing yourself a disservice. It's been quite a couple months since I've watched it my first time and it's a movie I ponder on even this much time later.

The Devil's Candy is one of those films that deserves to be seen. It's an original piece of arthouse horror with great (unknown) actors and a terrific script. What's yet to be left unlingering in my mind is a certain characters voice that continues to be present in my nightmares. Whatever Sean Bryne has up his sleeves with his next crack at it, for one I sure hope it doesn't take another 5 year gap, and two it'll be hard to top his first two films but he's capable enough so I'm sure hell will continue to be unleashed. A-

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I love how you edited your post to officially out me out of the closet?" It's like you asked yourself if you were a big enough cunt in the post, concluded that you weren't, and added it in to satisfy your postly cunt quota
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I converted to Islam today.

Allah Supreme.
A Love Supreme.
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saw LeBron James downtown but then I realized I'm just racist
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Old 07-15-2018, 07:57 AM   #60 (permalink)
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I agree that tbe opening scene is great but the plot felt slapped together, the suspenseful moments were cheap and forced, and JFC those ****ty, ****ty actors.
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