The Bitter (hardcore, rock, song, suicide)

madeinNY · 12-27-2005, 04:11 PM

A/N: Again, not edited...HELPFUL critism is warmy accepted.
---

It's forbidden, what we're doing, baby.
That's why she made us stop...

When I heard from you again
it was like an electric shock.

Back in the old swing again
You and me...

What she doesn't understand is
your never to old for love

She though it was forbidden
Though you weren't who you said you were

Don't worry baby...I bealive you.
But now you're with that other girl
And it's bittersweet for me

Because I know your happy (happy)

There was something in your eyes when we were together
Now that something is gone
Thats the bitter.

I miss you.
That's the bitter.

I pine for you
That's the bitter.

You don't love me anymore.
That's the bitter.

You never loved me in the first place.
That's the bitter.

It was infatuation, you said.
That's the bitter.

I still love ya.
That's the bitter.

You're out of my reach.
That's the bitter.

You're happy.
Thats the sweet.

Now that you're truely happy...or so you say. I can rest on a facade of your happiness. Rest meaning the pills will put me to sleep.

That's the bitter.

---
Thanks alexisonfire for the line in bold.

sleepy jack · 12-27-2005, 04:14 PM

That the pill line seemd like a suicide refference which is lame over a guy.
the "thats the bitter" part is way repetive, and the you can fall in love at any age makes it seem like its being written by a 11 year old with a case of puppy love. Its okay thats 'bout it.

madeinNY · 12-27-2005, 04:20 PM

Well...I meant sleeping pills, but I can see how someone could take it the way you did.

Its not a guy...lol

Well....the "you can fall in love at any age" thing is because..well, the "she" I refer to thats tearing the couple apart is a mom, and she always said "she's too old for you". And my friends always used to say to me "you can fall in love at any age..." and it was way more than puppy love...but I could see how you would get that...how do I incorporate the previous paragraph into the "you can fall in love at any age" thing??

sleepy jack · 12-27-2005, 04:26 PM

"What she doesn't understand is your never to old for love"

madeinNY · 12-27-2005, 04:27 PM

Aye, thank you muchly Ethan.

either/or · 12-27-2005, 04:53 PM

never too old for love? 80 years olds having a baby is what i thought of when i read that. and the line with the pills, it seems a little long and more like a sentence than a line in a song. ohhh and this about lesbians?

madeinNY · 12-27-2005, 04:57 PM

Nope...its not about lesbians. Don't be so quik to judge...

Hey that was Misfits line, not mine...but I think it was a good line and fitted well with what I was trying to say.
Thank you non the less for your critism...

either/or · 12-27-2005, 05:00 PM

damn. mmm now i will give my positive thoughts. the bit where its like its bitter, its bitter after each bit and that the person is happy is the sweet is really good, i liked that. i can almost hear that in the song. what kind of song is it? hardcore, acoustic, wateva?

sleepy jack · 12-27-2005, 05:01 PM

I think your never to old for love is better then you can love at any age.

madeinNY · 12-27-2005, 05:03 PM

I'm thinking it's going to turn out to be a kind of soft rock thing

thanks for your thoughts.

12-27-2005, 04:11 PM	#1 (permalink)
madeinNY [[la de da diddy da]] Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: NY...duh. Posts: 444	The Bitter A/N: Again, not edited...HELPFUL critism is warmy accepted. --- It's forbidden, what we're doing, baby. That's why she made us stop... When I heard from you again it was like an electric shock. Back in the old swing again You and me... What she doesn't understand is your never to old for love She though it was forbidden Though you weren't who you said you were Don't worry baby...I bealive you. But now you're with that other girl And it's bittersweet for me Because I know your happy (happy) There was something in your eyes when we were together Now that something is gone Thats the bitter. I miss you. That's the bitter. I pine for you That's the bitter. You don't love me anymore. That's the bitter. You never loved me in the first place. That's the bitter. It was infatuation, you said. That's the bitter. I still love ya. That's the bitter. You're out of my reach. That's the bitter. You're happy. Thats the sweet. Now that you're truely happy...or so you say. I can rest on a facade of your happiness. Rest meaning the pills will put me to sleep. That's the bitter. --- Thanks alexisonfire for the line in bold. __________________ I cleared out my PM box...I promise. lol

12-27-2005, 04:20 PM	#3 (permalink)
madeinNY [[la de da diddy da]] Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: NY...duh. Posts: 444	Well...I meant sleeping pills, but I can see how someone could take it the way you did. Its not a guy...lol Well....the "you can fall in love at any age" thing is because..well, the "she" I refer to thats tearing the couple apart is a mom, and she always said "she's too old for you". And my friends always used to say to me "you can fall in love at any age..." and it was way more than puppy love...but I could see how you would get that...how do I incorporate the previous paragraph into the "you can fall in love at any age" thing?? __________________ I cleared out my PM box...I promise. lol

12-27-2005, 04:27 PM	#5 (permalink)
madeinNY [[la de da diddy da]] Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: NY...duh. Posts: 444	Aye, thank you muchly Ethan. __________________ I cleared out my PM box...I promise. lol

12-27-2005, 04:53 PM	#6 (permalink)
either/or Don't think twice Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: A basement on the hill Posts: 352	never too old for love? 80 years olds having a baby is what i thought of when i read that. and the line with the pills, it seems a little long and more like a sentence than a line in a song. ohhh and this about lesbians? __________________ Painstaking devotion and love Surrendered to self preservation From others who care for themselves A blindness that touches perfection But hurts just like anything else Isolation, isolation, isolation

12-27-2005, 04:57 PM	#7 (permalink)
madeinNY [[la de da diddy da]] Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: NY...duh. Posts: 444	Nope...its not about lesbians. Don't be so quik to judge... Hey that was Misfits line, not mine...but I think it was a good line and fitted well with what I was trying to say. Thank you non the less for your critism... __________________ I cleared out my PM box...I promise. lol

12-27-2005, 05:00 PM	#8 (permalink)
either/or Don't think twice Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: A basement on the hill Posts: 352	damn. mmm now i will give my positive thoughts. the bit where its like its bitter, its bitter after each bit and that the person is happy is the sweet is really good, i liked that. i can almost hear that in the song. what kind of song is it? hardcore, acoustic, wateva? __________________ Painstaking devotion and love Surrendered to self preservation From others who care for themselves A blindness that touches perfection But hurts just like anything else Isolation, isolation, isolation

12-27-2005, 05:03 PM	#10 (permalink)
madeinNY [[la de da diddy da]] Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: NY...duh. Posts: 444	I'm thinking it's going to turn out to be a kind of soft rock thing thanks for your thoughts. __________________ I cleared out my PM box...I promise. lol