A Few Empty Bottles (Religious, member, review, quote, memory)

A_Perfect_Sonnet · 01-10-2006, 08:53 PM

Ben Stivers
1/2/06

What We Found At the Scene Were A Few Empty Bottles and Two Dead Hearts

It's all in passing
Glances at the watch.

The mixers we downed in our stupor said
That we could walk on water if we tried,
We drowned our Jesus image last night...

And when you wake up it's morning.
You've got oil and blood on your hands.

A memory solidified at a midnight crash site,
The biting tongues of serpents still poised to strike,
They bleed the life out from her face.
They poison the light out of the day.

Regret, regret can make you weak.

Behind every bar lie bottles of guilt.
Behind every wheel is the power to kill.
Inside every cemetary lie shallow graves.
Inside every cell is another behind the reins.

sleepy jack · 01-10-2006, 10:38 PM

Your so fucking good, this is a shit review but nice job.

creepinson · 01-11-2006, 01:54 PM

wasnt this on mx too? i remember it was really good... the religious conentations are really what stand out to me... in particular i dont like the regret line, before you final stanza. My only other problem are the two middle lines in the final stanza, and although the first is not my favourite, i can live with it. The final line is brilliant. APS shall go down in history

Crazy Luv · 01-15-2006, 12:19 AM

i like it

Quote:

Regret, regret can make you weak.

thats true as ****

Quote:

Behind every bar lies bottles of guilt.
Behind every wheel is the power to kill.
Inside every cemetary lie shallow graves.
Inside every cell is another behind the reins.

^thats my favorite part

either/or · 01-15-2006, 01:40 AM

wow this **** is nice. i especially like the last part, last four lines or so.

01-10-2006, 08:53 PM	#1 (permalink)
A_Perfect_Sonnet Dinosaurus Rex!!! Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Winchester, VA Posts: 896	A Few Empty Bottles Ben Stivers 1/2/06 What We Found At the Scene Were A Few Empty Bottles and Two Dead Hearts It's all in passing Glances at the watch. The mixers we downed in our stupor said That we could walk on water if we tried, We drowned our Jesus image last night... And when you wake up it's morning. You've got oil and blood on your hands. A memory solidified at a midnight crash site, The biting tongues of serpents still poised to strike, They bleed the life out from her face. They poison the light out of the day. Regret, regret can make you weak. Behind every bar lie bottles of guilt. Behind every wheel is the power to kill. Inside every cemetary lie shallow graves. Inside every cell is another behind the reins.

01-15-2006, 01:40 AM	#5 (permalink)
either/or Don't think twice Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: A basement on the hill Posts: 352	wow this **** is nice. i especially like the last part, last four lines or so. __________________ Painstaking devotion and love Surrendered to self preservation From others who care for themselves A blindness that touches perfection But hurts just like anything else Isolation, isolation, isolation

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

01-11-2006, 01:54 PM	#3 (permalink)
creepinson you are freakin out, man Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: ajax, ontario Posts: 129	wasnt this on mx too? i remember it was really good... the religious conentations are really what stand out to me... in particular i dont like the regret line, before you final stanza. My only other problem are the two middle lines in the final stanza, and although the first is not my favourite, i can live with it. The final line is brilliant. APS shall go down in history