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Old 04-09-2006, 05:14 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default 2 songs 1 rap

Outta Control

[chorus]
I'm not healthy,
Won't somebody help me,
Before I get so sick,
That I can't be saved,
I'm not healthy,
Won't somebody help me,
Before I get so sick,
And I won't be saved.

[verse1]
I thought I was being brave,
By taking all these tablets,
I'm under so much stress,
That I can't live without them,
I take two ever hour,
They make me feel better,
But I made the biggest mistake,
Forgetting they're not save.

[chorus]
I'm not healthy,
Won't somebody help me,
Before I get so sick,
That I can't be saved,
I'm not healthy,
Won't somebody help me,
Before I get so sick,
And I won't be saved.

[verse2]
Iíve forgotten what to say,
How I'm suppose to control,
Everything my kids do,
Gives me a headache,
So I just take another,
It makes my problems go away,
Then for the rest of the day,
I'm feeling okay.

[chorus]
I'm not healthy,
Won't somebody help me,
Before I get so sick,
That I can't be saved,
I'm not healthy,
Won't somebody help me,
Before I get so sick,
And I won't be saved.

[bridge]
I'm on edge lying on my bed,
My head's spinning so fast,
I'm outta control,
Don't know when it's gonna pass,
I don't want it to last,
My eyes are closing shut,
I'm starting to give up,
I'd do anything to make it end.

[chorus]
I'm not healthy,
Won't somebody help me,
Before I get so sick,
That I can't be saved,
I'm not healthy,
Won't somebody help me,
Before I get so sick,
And I won't be saved.

She is the one

[verse1]
There is a girl out there,
She doesn't even care,
What you say or do,
She'll make your dreams come true.

[chorus]
She is the one,
For you,
She is meant,
For you.

[verse2]
When you meet her,
You can't speak to her,
You don't know what to say,
Then you run away.

[chorus]
She is the one,
For you,
She is meant,
For you.

[verse3]
She's thinking "what the ****?,
I thought he wanted a suck",
She's thinking "it's all my fault,
But still why did he have to bolt".

[chorus]
She is the one,
For you,
She is meant,
For you.

[verse4]
That's the end,
My stupid friend,
She was the one,
Here's a gun.

[chorus]
She is the one,
For you,
She is meant,
For you.

Where's the Mic at

[verse1]
Is this what life is,
Show me where the knife is,
Before I go crazy with hate,
Stab him before it's too late,
For what's about to come,
Tell my little bro to go home,
I don't want him to see,
What will probably happen to me,
I'll die to save my mom,
Even if it makes me the stupid one,
I just don't give a **** about my dad,
Him making my brothers and sisters sad,
He's trying to be the big man,
Nobody knows my ****ing plan,
To get rid of him I can't wait,
I know this is my ****ing fate.

[chorus]
Show me where the mic is at,
Tell you all a little fact,
I'm not the one who's got your back.
Show me where the mic is at,
Tell you all a little fact,
I'm not the one who's got your back.

[verse2]
I'm ready to complete the task,
Of putting a bullet in my dad's ass,
Can't wait to see him scream,
This must be all a ****ing dream,
Just to make sure he is dead,
I'll put another bullet in his head,
Now I have to get rid of him,
Maybe stuff him in the rubbish bin,
Now I'm going to my girlfriend who's a slut,
And I'm gonna to **** her up the butt.

[chorus]
Show me where the mic is at,
Tell you all a little fact,
I'm not the one who's got your back.
Show me where the mic is at,
Tell you all a little fact,
I'm not the one who's got your back.

Okay my mate needs help on a third verse for Where's the mic at and I've written the other two, let me know what ya'll think?
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Old 04-10-2006, 06:49 AM   #2 (permalink)
that's my war face.
 
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Haha is the where is the mic at one a joke? Because it had me laughing. I do like the 'Tell me where the mic is at and I'll tell you all a little fact' line though. And the 'put a bullet in my Dad's ass' line is also a classic, but maybe for the wrong reasons.
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Old 04-10-2006, 01:18 PM   #3 (permalink)
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my mate says thanks for the comment. He doesn't know what he should do for the next verse any ideas?
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Old 04-10-2006, 02:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
a l'amou fou pou tout
 
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at first i didnt like Outta Control, but then i started to

at first i liked She is the One, but then i didnt

Where the Mics At is okay, i like it, its funny
I cant help you with ideas for the 3rd verse
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Old 04-11-2006, 01:37 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Okay now I've read them all. Outta Control=average. First verse needs sorting and I think you should develop on each idea that you use instead of just shaving the surface. And try not to talk about the tablets-hint at them, but never mention them and see how that works.

She is the one=Majory dislike. The verses are bad and I can't see any redeeming qualities.

Where is the mic=So awfully good. It's really really REALLY bad but I like it because of that. It's not something you should record or anything, but it's a good jokey song. The put a bullet in my Dad's ass line is a classic.
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Old 04-12-2006, 10:59 AM   #6 (permalink)
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okay I'm re writing Outta Control at the moment, I wrote She Is The One for fun and my mate's writing the third verse for Where is the mic at. I'll be reposting the finished versions of all the songs!
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