|05-16-2006, 04:21 PM||#1 (permalink)|
you are freakin out, man
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: ajax, ontario
Atrium Part 2
I think this is prolly the best of the three... but thats just me
Lead or Gold
If I’m supposed to be a savior, then why do I just lay here?
Thinking of how ill soon have wings and a crown of sunlit gold
Thinking of how whether dead in a coffin, or dead in a closet,
or alive in this bed, while the whole world watches.
Waiting as I wither, for the boys and the girls,
alive knowing they'd have died,
If I hadn’t done this to the world
And even still they struggle; and ask who god is testing
And they’re mothers will tell them
Question their failures, and never their blessings
(their failures and never my)
If I live I’m a waste, if I die I’m a hero
Now mother, please tell me, is that really a tear or
Are you waiting just like all of the rest?
I want to go home, but they say that im truly blessed.
Why should I care enough to open my eyes,
As long as I lie here, all I can do is hide
Like the people that will keep living just because of me
I’m not even dead yet, but I think soon I should be
What is a sacrifice?
(Put a face on this phantom
And call it an angel
What is a...)
(Now hope comes in shimmers
And failures in flames)
Watch them burn with me
I won’t let this stay the same.
|05-16-2006, 06:00 PM||#4 (permalink)|
Join Date: Dec 2005
I didn't come in here to crit your piece, I came to see where your slackass has been. I'm waiting for 3 to crit it all! Why crit an unfinished piece of work - cuz then I have to wonder, "Well maybe this will be explained in the next one, perhaps this will clarify things, etc etc.."