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Old 05-16-2010, 08:16 PM   #81 (permalink)
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Keep up the good work!
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Old 05-16-2010, 10:10 PM   #82 (permalink)
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Will do! Thank you for reading.
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Old 05-17-2010, 04:42 PM   #83 (permalink)
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DIVE INTO OBLIVION (TO BE YOUR FRIEND AGAIN)

I've got so much to say.
And "rest in peace" is too cliche.
You're all I found when I was lost.
Our paths are forever crossed...
In life or death.

You gave me more than I can repay.
I can give this song, but not this day.
For it's far too late.
**** this accursed fate.

For resurrection.
Juxtaposition.
Dive into oblivion....
Just to be your friend again.

You too, had more to say.
But your life: cut short, thousand days.
I'd like to think you're not lost.
Doesn't matter, cause you always find your way...
In life or death.

I dive...
To believe you're still alive.
I dive...
To believe you're still alive.

For resolution.
Justification.
Dive into oblivion...
Just to be your friend again.
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Old 05-17-2010, 04:43 PM   #84 (permalink)
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A LEGION OF GOATS

What I'm feeling...
What I'm leaving...
Escaping hate by way of avoidance.
Escaping fate for a much slower dance.
Oh, what I'm feeling.

There's a legion of goats...
Waiting outside my window.
Tearing out the throats...
Of the opposition.

Lost meaning.
Redundance drowns me.
Lost feeling.
Unique apathy.

There's a convoy of boats...
Searching for a place to hide.
They're sinking all that floats...
Stomp the competition.

Left dreaming.
These thoughts, they drown me.
Dream of leaving.
Unique galaxy.

Aaaaaaah!
What I'm feeling.
What I'm leaving behind.
Escaping hate, escaping fate.
Oh, what I'm feeling.

What*I'm feeling.
What I'm leaving behind.
Escaping hate, escaping fate.
Oh.
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Old 05-17-2010, 05:16 PM   #85 (permalink)
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I dig your stuff not my genre really but good.
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Old 05-18-2010, 04:54 PM   #86 (permalink)
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Thank you James. Here's one I wrote this morning:

CAUGHT UP

Biten off more than you can chew.
A mouthful of your prophet's flesh.
You got yourself caught up on a fence...
You tried to jump as you ran away.
Now you must face that stalking demon.

Thoughts of gold blind your view...
So you cannot see the black and blue.
Delusions of grandeur...
Have got you caught up in the allure.
Now you must face that stalking demon...
For there is nowhere to go.

Oh.
Did you think you could not fail?
Ignorance on the grandest scale.
If you survive, you have this tale...
Of how you got caught up.
Faced the walking phenom.
The stalking*demon.
The stalking demon.
Demon!

Last edited by Sljslj; 05-18-2010 at 05:09 PM. Reason: Just changing the wording a little bit.
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Old 05-19-2010, 02:13 PM   #87 (permalink)
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EVEN IF IT'S NO GOOD

Lie... light your way.
Ki... Keep moving.
And never stop, even if it's worthless...

She... she's a sheep.
She... she's asleep.
Just let her sleep, even if the dreams aren't right.

And even if it's no good...
It's good enough for me.
Even if shouldn't screams should...
I'm right where I SHOULD BE!

Me... meet my demise.
Sigh... a sign to go on.
DEFY!... AND LIE... LIGHT YOUR WAY!

And even if it's no good...
It's good enough for me.
Even if shouldn't screams should...
I'm right where I SHOULD BE!

Got everyone in ah, now.
Like never before, now.
HOLY COW!
Got everyone in ah, now.
Like never before, now.
HOLY ****!

And even if it's no good...
It never is anyway.
Even if every ****ing shouldn't SCREAMS SHOULD!
I will not go away.

And even if it's no good...
It's good enough for me.
Even if shouldn't screams should...
I'm right where I should be.
Today, I'm where I should be.

EDIT: To clarify, Ki means the circulating life energy that travels through all objects, alive or otherwise.
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Old 05-20-2010, 04:55 PM   #88 (permalink)
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*I was reading through my collection and I came across one called "Just Another" (I believe it's posted somewhere on here). And although I like it, it wouldn't fit in with all the other stuff I want to record and my voice just isn't made for that kind of song... My intention this time was write a death metal song, but it has a very industrial/techno-metal feel to it*

AUTOBIOGRAPH-I!

I, I, I!
I'm just a stoner...
And I'm a mother ****ing loner.
That blank-faced black canine...
The only thing on my side.

I, I, I!
I'm just an *******... (a s s h o l e)
And I'm a body without a soul.
I like to tell dirty jokes...
And smokin' those menthol smokes.

I, I, I!
I'm just another.
Just another.
Just another.
Another stoner.
Another mother ****er.

I lie, lie, lie.
Cry, cry, cry.
Then I'll die.

I, I, I!
I'm just a loser.
A drinky, drinky boozer.
Sleepy, sleepy snoozer.

Stoner!
*******! (a s s h o l e)
Loser!
Thriller, Killer, Destroy... ERRR!

I!
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Old 05-20-2010, 06:08 PM   #89 (permalink)
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If "Autobiograph-I" is criticizing and satirizing this lifestyle or the mentality that any person is just a stoner/killer, etc., then I quite like it. I like the image of the black canine, the only thing by this person's side.

Using swearwords so frequently makes them lose their impact, I feel. Also, "Cry cry cry" seems melodramatic in a song about someone described everywhere else in the song as unrepentantly callous and hurtful.
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Old 05-20-2010, 06:36 PM   #90 (permalink)
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Wow, you're good... that's pretty much what I was going for. I was just thinking earlier that the constant swearing was crippling my writing and that I need to slow down on it a bit. As far as the "Cry, cry, cry" part, I've been toying with the idea of keeping or trashing it.

Thanks Veg.
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