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Old 05-20-2014, 07:40 AM   #1551 (permalink)
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Man Busted For Trying To Have Sex With ATM | The Smoking Gun
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A middle class job sounds like a boring menu option at a brothel

She's a Brick House
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Old 05-20-2014, 10:29 AM   #1552 (permalink)
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Lonnie Hutton, 49, was collared at The Boro Bar and Grill, the Murfreesboro watering hole where he allegedly sought to make a 9 PM deposit.

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There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-20-2014, 06:05 PM   #1553 (permalink)
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Menstrual cycle phase alters women's sexual preferences for composers of more complex music.
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Old 05-20-2014, 08:03 PM   #1554 (permalink)
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Shark Killed by Tourist Bite in Costa Rica Causes Activist Outrage
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I'd vote for Trump
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Old 05-21-2014, 10:01 AM   #1555 (permalink)
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State TV: Iran police arrest 6 over 'Happy' video

I guess I'm not that shocked about it. Just a bit sad that they got arrested over hurting "public chastity".
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Fame, fortune, power, titties. People say these are the most crucial things in life, but you can have a pocket full o' gold and it doesn't mean sh*t if you don't have someone to share that gold with. Seems simple. Yet it's an important lesson to learn. Even lone wolves run in packs sometimes.


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IMO I don't know jack-**** though so don't listen to me.
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You're a terrible dictionary.
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Old 05-21-2014, 04:29 PM   #1556 (permalink)
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For the first few paragraphs I actually thought that was serious.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-21-2014, 06:55 PM   #1557 (permalink)
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27 year old man hides in teen's bedroom and closet for five days:


Man hides in teen's closet for 5 days; mom unaware


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STATESVILLE, N.C. — A man is suspected of hiding in a teen's closet for five days, running away when the girl's mother went to put some of her daughter's clothes away, authorities said.

Jarred Ashley Workman, 27, of Albemarle, N.C., turned himself in to Iredell County sheriff's deputies here Monday afternoon and was charged with 11 counts of statutory rape and five counts of statutory sex offense, all felonies. He is in jail on more than a $1 million bond.

His first court appearance was Tuesday. If convicted, Workman could face life in prison without parole, according to WCNC-TV, Charlotte.

The suspect met the 14-year-old girl online, investigators said. They chatted using social media for about a month and then agreed to meet in the woods near the teen's home in the Love Valley, N.C., area, about 60 miles north of Charlotte and 100 miles east of Asheville. He then sneaked into the girl's bedroom without her family's knowledge.

"During the day, he was either in her closet or in her bedroom, and when she would come home from school or on the weekend or whatever, he would come out in evenings," said Lt. Bill Hamby, a detective with the Iredell County Sheriff's Office here. The family is not being identified because of the nature of the charges.

In the five-day span from April 27 to May 2, Hamby said, the suspect had sex with the teen several times. In North Carolina, the age of consent for sexual activity is 16, as it is in 33 other states and the District of Columbia.

After the suspect fled, investigators tracked him through the woods behind the teen's house. His trail ran cold along North Carolina 115, where he might have gotten a ride.

Raising teenagers seems to get scarier all the time.
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Old 05-21-2014, 07:44 PM   #1558 (permalink)
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Is this even a real story? How oblivious are the parents? I don't think any competent parent should have any fear of this happening.
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Old 05-22-2014, 12:42 AM   #1559 (permalink)
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I know! I remember thinking my parents weren't too hard to fool when I was a teenager but even they wouldn't be that dumb. Can you imagine the mother's reaction when she discovered him? Also, did he just sit in there all day when the girl wasn't home? How did he eat or use the bathroom?

Hilariously relevant:
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Old 05-22-2014, 03:25 AM   #1560 (permalink)
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I know! I remember thinking my parents weren't too hard to fool when I was a teenager but even they wouldn't be that dumb. Can you imagine the mother's reaction when she discovered him? Also, did he just sit in there all day when the girl wasn't home? How did he eat or use the bathroom?

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Why, because he's in the closet, or because he (allegedly) had sex with a 14 year old>
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