Xurtio

Lololol slippery slope from vandal

__________________
H̓̇̅̉yͤ͏mͬ͂ͧn͑̽̽̌ͪ̑͐͟o̴͊̈́͑̇m͛͌̓ͦ̑aͫ̽ͤ̇n̅̎͐̒ͫ͐c̆ͯͫ̋ ̔̃́eͯ͒rͬͬ̄҉

Chula Vista

Not quite. The Dr. Spock book helped in the beginning. After that we relied on our combined 46 years of life experience (data). By the time Mike was born 6 years later we added a combined 12 years of parenting experience to the mix.

What the hell did people do for centuries before we had Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble to help us raise children?

__________________

“The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well,
on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away
and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.”

Xurtio

That's the appeal to nature at the end there... a bit of a technophobe ring to it.

I mean, what did people do before vaccines, right? Surely sickness is not relly a problem!

__________________
H̓̇̅̉yͤ͏mͬ͂ͧn͑̽̽̌ͪ̑͐͟o̴͊̈́͑̇m͛͌̓ͦ̑aͫ̽ͤ̇n̅̎͐̒ͫ͐c̆ͯͫ̋ ̔̃́eͯ͒rͬͬ̄҉

Chula Vista

Utterly ridiculous analogy.

Again ridiculous. Equating technology with parenting? Really?

__________________

“The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well,
on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away
and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.”

Xurtio

Chula, i think you have difficulty comprehendig the argument. There is no equating going on here. It's a matter of being resistant to new things, books are a technology, a tool people can use in parenting (I happen to not, I find books just as anecdotal and idiosyncratic as the views in this thread). I am a participant in the mental health community. I care about what works, not ideological values.

__________________
H̓̇̅̉yͤ͏mͬ͂ͧn͑̽̽̌ͪ̑͐͟o̴͊̈́͑̇m͛͌̓ͦ̑aͫ̽ͤ̇n̅̎͐̒ͫ͐c̆ͯͫ̋ ̔̃́eͯ͒rͬͬ̄҉

Key

I'm pretty sure Chula isn't the one having the issue here.

If you're such a master of mental health, tell me precisely why I deal with anxiety and have dealt with it my whole life. Go ahead, i'm waiting.

Chula Vista

I am not resistant to new technology one bit when it comes to material things like my IT stuff, home entertainment devices, and musical gear to name a few.

Books are educational and a tool, I agree. That's why I bought the Spock book - the widely acclaimed bible on babies in 1983. But after that we chose to parent based on how we agreed to do things - without having to check the NY Times best seller list every 3 months to make sure we were keeping up with what the latest expert and/or trend was saying was the right way to do it.

The other thing to realize is that my two kids turned six years old in 1989 and 1995 respectively - long before the explosion of e-info.

Parents today are bombarded with "how to raise a child" info if they want to seek it out. How do they decide which way to go if they choose that route? Which data do you settle on in an age where for everyone saying UP is the right way to go, there's just as many saying DOWN is the right way. Do you base it on the Amazon star rating system?

I can't relate with all of that when it comes to deciding how to raise a human being.

__________________

“The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well,
on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away
and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.”

Xurtio

When the reserch is so controversial (as many ups as downs and no clear alterior motive for one camp or the other) I just assume it doesn't matter and go with intuition. Intuition is dominant and inescapable anyway. Unless you have severe OCD, your natural parenting habits are going to dominate - but it doesn't hurt to be informed when you're conflicted about an issue.

And I know it's easy to get frustrated and lose it with kids, it's pretty typical. But I don't count that as discipline and I think some people just call it discipline to justify it because they dont want to admit they lost their cool.

__________________
H̓̇̅̉yͤ͏mͬ͂ͧn͑̽̽̌ͪ̑͐͟o̴͊̈́͑̇m͛͌̓ͦ̑aͫ̽ͤ̇n̅̎͐̒ͫ͐c̆ͯͫ̋ ̔̃́eͯ͒rͬͬ̄҉

Key

^no. It's discipline because children need to be disciplined.

Chula Vista

Can you provide some examples of issues?

I've stated a number of times already that physical discipline was always reserved for extreme and dangerous behavior with our kids.

__________________

“The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well,
on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away
and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.”