The many benefits of a child-free life

ladyislingering · 11-19-2013, 09:27 PM

As long as I've been alive, I've never had a desire to be around children. I've never wanted one of my own, and I've never been able to find any reason why it would be a logical decision for me (or anyone).

Usually when people find out about this, they're aghast. They're so offended by a woman in charge of her body, making her own decisions about what she wants or doesn't want to do with it. They can't believe what they're hearing. I get a lot of hate for my lifestyle, and it surprises me. The love of my life has the same beliefs I do about the childfree life: it's fabulous, rewarding, and what we'll keep on doing forever. Neither of us want children, and here's why I believe a lot of people could benefit from swearing off the social pressure of having children.

Think about it: why do people have children? Most of the time it's because that's what they think they're "supposed to do". People follow this ridiculous recipe for the "perfect" life, and they lose themselves in it.

First I'll discuss the things that we enjoy as a childfree couple, then I'll let you in on my personal freedoms and pleasures that would be robbed from me if I made the mistake of having a child.

Spoiler for disclaimer:

As a childfree couple, we are able to:

Spoiler for politely contained in a spoiler to minimize stretching:

There are many more that I'm possibly forgetting, but our life is truly beautiful because we don't have any kids, and never will.

Some of the little things I enjoy as a child-free woman:

Spoiler for contained in a spoiler as to not stretch your page:

And that's just the beginning of how rewarding it is to be child-free.

Now for the poll: do you see a necessity in breeding?

~~Sansa Stark~~ · 11-19-2013, 09:28 PM

yeah because my body can make a baby so I want a baby

thats p much the short of it
I'll be a bad ass mommy tho

idc what other people do with their uteruses tho, its not my business

ladyislingering · 11-19-2013, 09:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sansa Stark

yeah because my body can make a baby so I want a baby

thats p much the short of it
I'll be a bad ass mommy tho

idc what other people do with their uteruses tho, its not my business

it's pretty incredible that women are capable of making another human; that's pretty badass and scientific and whatnot. (but it's not for everyone.)

would it improve your life?

would it be worth it?

~~Sansa Stark~~ · 11-19-2013, 09:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladyislingering

it's pretty incredible that women are capable of making another human; that's pretty badass and scientific and whatnot. (but it's not for everyone.)

would it improve your life?

would it be worth it?

Well bb not just women remember :P

I think it would, I really think I'll make a great mother and I'll pass on my sensibilities and ideas on to a little person who will hopefully grow up to be as kind, patient and compassionate as their mummy. If they're not just like me I won't be mad though, I'll at least know that I put something in this world that was raised to be accepting of others.

ladyislingering · 11-19-2013, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by butthead aka 216

sounds like youre tryin to justify the decision to yourself

Usually when people find out about this, they're aghast. They're so offended by a woman in charge of her body,

thats really the first think you think of?? lol so absurd.

anyway like i said somewhere else, the wrong ppl are havin kids. uneducated losers are havin the most children. then their children do the same. so theres no necessity in breeding. if there was a possible way itd be great to sterilize these ppl.

my theory is these ppl have kids more quickly and more often because they have little else in their life. kids also probably keep marriages more together. i plan to have a boy someday.

I don't need to justify my decision not to have children, any more than a woman needs to justify her choice to have them. I just get a lot of really bizarre reactions, and they're often hateful. Like, heaven forbid, a young woman knows what she wants to do with herself.

I agree with you on one note: too many idiots are having kids.

Not too sure on whether kids would strengthen a marriage (I recall a recent study showing that they just make things worse, but wouldn't know where to find the article) but I do know that they're the ones that suffer if a marriage is unfit, or if their parents are divorcing. There's a lot of trauma to be had by a child birthed by people who don't love each other.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sansa Stark

Well bb not just women remember :P

I think it would, I really think I'll make a great mother and I'll pass on my sensibilities and ideas on to a little person who will hopefully grow up to be as kind, patient and compassionate as their mummy. If they're not just like me I won't be mad though, I'll at least know that I put something in this world that was raised to be accepting of others.

well, yeah, dudes have a place in it, but they don't have a uterus.

motherhood would fit you well, because you have the best interest of a child in mind. you're the difference between a parent and a breeder, and that's great. too many people are simple breeders, having kids only for the sake of doing what they think they should be doing with their lives, rather than being parents and actually raising children with love and good intentions.

Xurtio · 04-09-2014, 06:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladyislingering

it's pretty incredible that women are capable of making another human; that's pretty badass and scientific and whatnot. (but it's not for everyone.)

would it improve your life?

would it be worth it?

It's domain-specific. It improves some parts of your life but competes with other parts of your life. Most people don't have kids on purpose, believe it or not... otherwise the human race would have died out long ago.

Once you have kids though, you magically fall in love with them and they bring you joy in a lot of ways that you might have never predicted (of course, they also bring frustrations and are a drain on resources).

Is it worth it? Pre-parent me would say hell no, post-parent me says hell yes. So... my advice is don't have kids, and you'll never know what you're missing.

ladyislingering · 04-09-2014, 12:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Xurtio

So... my advice is don't have kids, and you'll never know what you're missing.

Everything I'm "missing", compact edition:

No sleep (this will persist for the rest of the child's life) due to (but obviously not limited to)

Crying baby won't shut the hell up
Crying baby just shit itself (again)
Crying baby is awake at 2am...and 4am...and 7am...
Toddler child is learning how to use the toilet
Toddler child just pissed all over its bed again
Toddler child is terrified of the bathroom
Toddler child is having night terrors
Child-child is having night terrors
Preteen child is still awake at 1am and you know it, and it bothers you
Preteen child is trying to sneak out at night despite your best efforts to raise them to not be a piece of shit
Teenager isn't going to bed on time because "fuck you, mom"
Teenager has stayed out past their curfew and doesn't have the decency to call you

Your children will always be a financial drain on you until they get a goddamn job.

Furthermore, a lot of things you once enjoyed become unpleasant, such as (but not limited to) -

Having any "quiet time" whatsoever, because it's probably being spoiled by the anxiety that your child will erupt at any given second.

Shopping. Anywhere. The minute Mt. Shitpants erupts, everyone hates you.

Having pets (because your child is curious - and also an asshole).

Eating. Because your child is drooling all over their face, smearing food everywhere, getting food particles into the weirdest areas of their head, and when they're older, they're bound to have an attitude problem over whatever it is you're serving.

And don't even start to tell me that I'm just focusing on the baby/toddler aspect. I'm well aware that preteens and teenagers are the absolute worst, rotten to the core, no matter how good of a parent you are. Just because you don't have to wipe their ass or dress them anymore doesn't mean they're not a huge pain in your ass.

I don't like people. Period. I don't want to be in charge of a person because no parent is perfect, and not everyone who manages to breed can actually be considered a "parent".

There is literally nothing I'm "missing", thank you very much, but there's a hell of a lot of awesome stuff in my life that isn't being ruined by a child right now.

Xurtio · 04-09-2014, 01:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladyislingering

Everything I'm "missing", compact edition:

No sleep (this will persist for the rest of the child's life) due to (but obviously not limited to)

Crying baby won't shut the hell up
Crying baby just shit itself (again)
Crying baby is awake at 2am...and 4am...and 7am...
Toddler child is learning how to use the toilet
Toddler child just pissed all over its bed again
Toddler child is terrified of the bathroom
Toddler child is having night terrors
Child-child is having night terrors
Preteen child is still awake at 1am and you know it, and it bothers you
Preteen child is trying to sneak out at night despite your best efforts to raise them to not be a piece of shit
Teenager isn't going to bed on time because "fuck you, mom"
Teenager has stayed out past their curfew and doesn't have the decency to call you

Your children will always be a financial drain on you until they get a goddamn job.

Furthermore, a lot of things you once enjoyed become unpleasant, such as (but not limited to) -

Having any "quiet time" whatsoever, because it's probably being spoiled by the anxiety that your child will erupt at any given second.

Shopping. Anywhere. The minute Mt. Shitpants erupts, everyone hates you.

Having pets (because your child is curious - and also an asshole).

Eating. Because your child is drooling all over their face, smearing food everywhere, getting food particles into the weirdest areas of their head, and when they're older, they're bound to have an attitude problem over whatever it is you're serving.

And don't even start to tell me that I'm just focusing on the baby/toddler aspect. I'm well aware that preteens and teenagers are the absolute worst, rotten to the core, no matter how good of a parent you are. Just because you don't have to wipe their ass or dress them anymore doesn't mean they're not a huge pain in your ass.

I don't like people. Period. I don't want to be in charge of a person because no parent is perfect, and not everyone who manages to breed can actually be considered a "parent".

There is literally nothing I'm "missing", thank you very much, but there's a hell of a lot of awesome stuff in my life that isn't being ruined by a child right now.

There's something overly dramatic about your post. I can't quite put my finger on it...

zombie kid · 04-09-2014, 04:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladyislingering

Everything I'm "missing", compact edition:

No sleep (this will persist for the rest of the child's life) due to (but obviously not limited to)

Crying baby won't shut the hell up
Crying baby just shit itself (again)
Crying baby is awake at 2am...and 4am...and 7am...
Toddler child is learning how to use the toilet
Toddler child just pissed all over its bed again
Toddler child is terrified of the bathroom
Toddler child is having night terrors
Child-child is having night terrors
Preteen child is still awake at 1am and you know it, and it bothers you
Preteen child is trying to sneak out at night despite your best efforts to raise them to not be a piece of shit
Teenager isn't going to bed on time because "fuck you, mom"
Teenager has stayed out past their curfew and doesn't have the decency to call you

Your children will always be a financial drain on you until they get a goddamn job.

Furthermore, a lot of things you once enjoyed become unpleasant, such as (but not limited to) -

Having any "quiet time" whatsoever, because it's probably being spoiled by the anxiety that your child will erupt at any given second.

Shopping. Anywhere. The minute Mt. Shitpants erupts, everyone hates you.

Having pets (because your child is curious - and also an asshole).

Eating. Because your child is drooling all over their face, smearing food everywhere, getting food particles into the weirdest areas of their head, and when they're older, they're bound to have an attitude problem over whatever it is you're serving.

And don't even start to tell me that I'm just focusing on the baby/toddler aspect. I'm well aware that preteens and teenagers are the absolute worst, rotten to the core, no matter how good of a parent you are. Just because you don't have to wipe their ass or dress them anymore doesn't mean they're not a huge pain in your ass.

I don't like people. Period. I don't want to be in charge of a person because no parent is perfect, and not everyone who manages to breed can actually be considered a "parent".

There is literally nothing I'm "missing", thank you very much, but there's a hell of a lot of awesome stuff in my life that isn't being ruined by a child right now.

Do you really think that people who want children don't realize any of that? What a fucking dramatic and unnecessary post (since you've already stated your feelings so many times in this topic). Your feelings are not going to sway people who have already made up their mind. Accept that people want different things in their life that will make them happy. It's fine to not want kids, but stop shoving it down everyone's throats.

~~butthead aka 216~~ · 11-19-2013, 09:32 PM

sounds like youre tryin to justify the decision to yourself

Usually when people find out about this, they're aghast. They're so offended by a woman in charge of her body,

thats really the first think you think of?? lol so absurd.

anyway like i said somewhere else, the wrong ppl are havin kids. uneducated losers are havin the most children. then their children do the same. so theres no necessity in breeding. if there was a possible way itd be great to sterilize these ppl.

my theory is these ppl have kids more quickly and more often because they have little else in their life. kids also probably keep marriages more together. i plan to have a boy someday.

View Poll Results: How do you plead?
I'm a parent	11	17.74%
I'm a child-free woman/man	24	38.71%
I want to have kids someday (please explain)	18	29.03%
I'm undecided	9	14.52%
Voters: 62. You may not vote on this poll

11-19-2013, 09:27 PM	#1 (permalink)
ladyislingering Maelian Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: Seattle Posts: 695	The many benefits of a child-free life As long as I've been alive, I've never had a desire to be around children. I've never wanted one of my own, and I've never been able to find any reason why it would be a logical decision for me (or anyone). Usually when people find out about this, they're aghast. They're so offended by a woman in charge of her body, making her own decisions about what she wants or doesn't want to do with it. They can't believe what they're hearing. I get a lot of hate for my lifestyle, and it surprises me. The love of my life has the same beliefs I do about the childfree life: it's fabulous, rewarding, and what we'll keep on doing forever. Neither of us want children, and here's why I believe a lot of people could benefit from swearing off the social pressure of having children. Think about it: why do people have children? Most of the time it's because that's what they think they're "supposed to do". People follow this ridiculous recipe for the "perfect" life, and they lose themselves in it. First I'll discuss the things that we enjoy as a childfree couple, then I'll let you in on my personal freedoms and pleasures that would be robbed from me if I made the mistake of having a child. Spoiler for disclaimer: I don't hate or look down on people who have children if they genuinely love them and are able to take care of them to the best of their ability. I just don't want to be one of them. As a childfree couple, we are able to: Spoiler for politely contained in a spoiler to minimize stretching: Buy nice things for each other, and fill our apartment with nice things without having to worry about child-proofing. Sleep in on our days off, sleep early, sleep late. Sleep whenever it's convenient. God, we love our sleep. The only thing either of us will wake up for in the middle of the night is a long piss, maximum of a minute or two, and we're back to sleep. Can't do that with screaming gremlins. Save a ton of money on everything because we don't have to buy things for children. When we get our cats, it'll still be easy. Cat food is less than 75 cents per can, and you can buy kibble in giant bags. It's like giving up a weekly Starbucks run. It's nothin'. And cat litter is infinitely cheaper than baby diapers or any other ridiculous thing those smelly ingrates require. Uninterrupted sex. And I have a nice figure that will never be destroyed by childbearing. I'll never have a cavernous vagina, or a flabby body for the vain hope of letting forth my genetics, creating a human that will hate me when they're 12. Fuck that! Dual income, and we don't have to worry about planning our days around kids. We can both work as much as we please, spend our days off however we want, and enjoy ourselves. Minimal chores, and the grossest it gets is a mildly dirty toilet. No diaper changing, no sponging up projectile vomit (at least when cats vomit, it doesn't get everywhere), no dirty face to wipe off, no food or boogers or poop smeared on walls. We only have to take out the trash once a week. Endless time to surf the internet or relax together however we please. There are many more that I'm possibly forgetting, but our life is truly beautiful because we don't have any kids, and never will. Some of the little things I enjoy as a child-free woman: Spoiler for contained in a spoiler as to not stretch your page: Taking as much time as I like to put on make-up, fix my hair, choose the right outfit, etc. I don't have to worry about keeping an eye on a child, or dressing a child. I can take my time and work on myself. My record collection, and the fact that I can leave my phonograph unattended and not have to worry about some nasty little brat ruining the record or the machine. I can maintain ass-length hair and not have it pulled or messed by a child. I can have dozens of candles all around the apartment. It's much easier to cat-proof than to child-proof your candle burning zones. Cats don't have thumbs. I can devote all of my attention to the one I love. He'll never be neglected in any way (as I'm sure many fathers are - mom doesn't have time for baby and dad). I don't need to buy health insurance. I don't have it, and I don't feel I need it. If I had a kid, I'd have to pay for all of that shit. No thanks. And that's just the beginning of how rewarding it is to be child-free. Now for the poll: do you see a necessity in breeding? __________________ You and I, We were born to die.

11-19-2013, 09:28 PM	#2 (permalink)
~~Sansa Stark~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: The Eyrie, Vale of Arryn, Westeros Posts: 3,234	yeah because my body can make a baby so I want a baby thats p much the short of it I'll be a bad ass mommy tho idc what other people do with their uteruses tho, its not my business

11-19-2013, 09:32 PM	#10 (permalink)
~~butthead aka 216~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Jun 2013 Location: freely swimmin thru the waters of glory much like a majestic bald eagle soars thru the skies Posts: 1,463	sounds like youre tryin to justify the decision to yourself Usually when people find out about this, they're aghast. They're so offended by a woman in charge of her body, thats really the first think you think of?? lol so absurd. anyway like i said somewhere else, the wrong ppl are havin kids. uneducated losers are havin the most children. then their children do the same. so theres no necessity in breeding. if there was a possible way itd be great to sterilize these ppl. my theory is these ppl have kids more quickly and more often because they have little else in their life. kids also probably keep marriages more together. i plan to have a boy someday.