American Thanksgiving is the only Thanksgiving that counts. People have no hearts and the white men who drove the natives out of their land are being persecuted by this Christmas obsessed culture.

Yeah, I know, but don't you think the Pilgrims could have timed it better? I mean seriously, why have a big turkey dinner in November when you know you're going to be stuffing yourself all over again in a month? Seems to me like laziness, not planning ahead enough.

the pilgrims didn't celebrate christmas cause they were too puritanical for that kind of pagan bull****.

You're supposed to be a fat fuck once winter hits, and becoming a fatter fuck during the winter is ideal as well. The pilgrims timed it right.

This is why Canadians suck ass.

Canadian: "Oh, I just ate an entire turkey. I don't want to eat a pig so soon."

American: "I just ate a ****in' turkey! Gimme a god damn pig!"

i was unaware that canada even had their own thanksgiving up until now... that's kind of curious to me. like what is it that makes you feel you need a holiday to give thanks for having canada. like anybody was really going to fight you for that massive frozen piece of tundra.

We tried to fight them for it in 1812.

did we? we must've been bored as ****.

Did we actually fight them for it, or did they just go to war with us like good little British subjects?

Aye, and we kicked your arses. (Oh no, here comes the whole "Who won the War of 1812" business.)