My lack of life experience renders me incapable of offering any practical advice, so all I can say is that I'm sending positive vibes in your general direction, Roxy. It's an awful situation for you. :(

I had to finally sever ties with one of my best friends back when we were in our early 20s. Dude was a raging alcoholic and drug abuser who flat out lost his mind when really messed up. The final straw was him getting arrested out in front of my house after leading the cops on a chase. The local cops knew him (and me) well so they let me spend most of the night sitting outside of his cell to talk him down. We even held hands thru the bars. He got bailed out the next morning and I took him out for breakfast where he swore up and down that he was finally going to get his **** together.

That night I got a call from the cops a few towns over saying that he was completely wasted and had assaulted an officer, was in jail, and was asking for me to come and bail him out. I gave them his mom's number instead and that was it. I was done with him. Too many years of that **** and I decided it was less painful having to turn my back on him that dealing with him anymore.

Amazingly he's still alive (he got really heavily into heroin for a while) although a total wreck from what I've heard.

So my advice is to ask yourself: Would it be less painful to turn your back that to keep dealing with his sh*t?

I commented on this in the thread Exo made but I'll repeat it here even though you'll probably disagree. For starters, I currently live in a town riddled with heroin (~150 heroin related OD deaths last year in just this town), grew up in town where tons of kids used it, and I'm still in contact with a few users. I lost 5+ friends/acquitances to ODs and drug related deaths in HS alone.

They are grown ups who need to be held accountable for their own decisions. You express your concern one time, be a good friend without enabling them, and if they shit on you than fuck em. I am not gonna waste my life picking up after people who willing destroy their own. I'm under the assumption that most of these people understand the consequences of their actions but have decided that they enjoy a life being doped out over stressing about all of life's burdens and taking the good with the bad. I don't hold it against them, I just don't think it's my responsibility to pamper adults. They die, I think it's a waste, and I move on.

He probably has tunnel vision on just getting high and doesn't or can't see the consequences of his addiction. There is only so much you can do as one person, and it seems he is beyond one friend helping him out, he needs professional help. Tell him the only thing you can do is be his voice of reason, moral support (or whatever you feel comfortable saying) if he wants to quit, but can stand by watching do this to himself. If this situation adds more stress in your life than you can handle you need tell him. Tell him how you feel.

I agree with your advice doll, because as much as I would like to say **** it all I don't have it in me. So arm's length is best. I can say the shoe has been on the other foot before and he never left me to my own devices.

But see, what is bothering me is I it from both an addict's perspective and a non addict perspective, I know what it is to be a completely self serving zombie.To not care about anything or anyone but my fix. It's almost like the person you know and love isn't in there they are replaced. Or it's like you become some manifestation of the drug itself. So saying they have to choose is kinda a double edged sword, because they are completely incapable of making decisions for themselves.

That choice should not be the addicts to make because even if they wanted they couldn't really make that choice.

And yet 1000s of people make that choice all across the country. Of course it takes a certain kind of person but I don't think all the responsibility should be removed from the addict. Some people need more help than others. Either way, good luck with your situation, I think you will make the best choice for you and your friend even without our advice. As much as I'd like to believe I have a good grasp of it the reality is I've never been an addict which puts me at a severe disadvantage.

I get that. But there are different levels of strung out and hung out.
When youv are a stage 5 clinger in deafcon 1 ,then you can't really even choose yer favorite cereal.

you sound high as **** roxy

Its well known I smoke weed everyday, mr grandhighpoobah of uppabutcrack. If ever there was a member that could benefit from a sensitivity training video itd be you.

my bad lol wasn't trying to insult you or anything

if it's any consolation i have way worse habits than just smoking weed every day