Standing directly under a parachuting accident.

The moon will crash into the Earth.

You were on the moon.

Crushed under the weight of Rush Limbaugh, Michael Moore, and Rosie O'Donnell at an orgy.

Masturbating furiously to this orgy made you so weak you fell down the stairs and broke your neck.

Sees shirtless pic of me
Instanttly soaks panties
So aroused
Takes off panties
Throws them
They hit toaster
Tryna make toast
Water + electricity causes sparks
Drapes catch on fire
House catches fire
House burned to the ground
Goid samaritan lets u in home for coffee
Good samaritan is me
U make sweet passionate love to samaritan
Cry joyoys tears of glory after sex
Drown in tears
RIP

Hahahahaha holy sh!t. Amazing.

Before I drown, I poison you in your sleep.

@Butthead: Smashed to death with a banhammer

gets time machine
travels to 2012 when yahoo chat was around
starts chattin to meet friends
talks to fellow young man name chris
share funny stories and music
become internet friends
gets drunk one nite
chris pressures him to cybersex
you say no it isnt right
tell your parents
trace IP
find out who chris was
it is chris hanson
call hanson on the phone
tell him you called the cops
he drives to your house in the night
murders you via steak knife

You're in the same room as yorkedaddy and guitarbizarre begin a three hour argument about what sock colour is objectively best and you die of boredom.