I use my toes.

I use my nose multiple times.

Hey, are we filming?
Youtube is gonna love this
Show me no mercy

Next topic: Easter candy

Peeps are real neat
So very sticky, the treats
Fun they are to eat


Peanut butter

Creamy for sandwich
Crunchy eaten out of jar
Both licked off your tits

Dinosaurs

Related to them,
a bird peers, pecks, and pounces,
a tiny T. Rex.

New Topic: a covered wagon

Our world in a cart
A dusty road with no end
Where's a McDonald's?

Batman vs. Superman

Dark Knight rises
Lois Lane's a slut
Underpants

Mac n Cheese

The Batlord eats some
Mac and Cheese 'cause his mom's not
A very good cook

Satan

Dude, that is not a haiku. You put five syllables in the second line, and three in the third. Fail.

The lord of hell fire
You can call him Beelzebub
He will eat your soul

Americans

The Batlord is a wienie
**** that stupid ****
FTFY

(To keep in line with dreadnaughts post, he's an American... not a shining example of one, but he is one nonetheless.)
Farts

Was that you, Plankton?
Who released that smelly cloud
Cause it wasn't me

Facebook

Murica Junk Food
The Batlord loves to eat it
And sniff his own farts

The Batlord - Plankton Smack Down

Why does Buttlord get top billing
He's not even worthy
Skillz

Smegma

haiku your protest
seventeen moraes in all
complain the right way

I am terrible
at this
don't even care

squirrel!

Trained in ninjitsu
A specter of the night sky
A squirrel of death

Penis

You're little and brown
You'll die if I step on you
Haha ur dead lol

EDIT: Feck. Passing on Batty's subject, then.

^That could apply to both a penis and a squirrel , so you pass.

Animals are love
Kill the bastard who harms them
Fur is murder, yes

Fresh fruit

picked up an apple
it told me a dirty joke
my that fruit was fresh

I think Briks' was skipped so

I like wasting time
I always share my bull****
Who are these people?

Coming to accept your fate in Batlords dungeon.

In his torture vault
I think I dig Limp Bizkit
And I love my tits

Accidentally murdering someone

M16 in hand
I has an itchy finger
bye bye little dude

Pizza

All pizza is good
Some borders on very good
Some is f*cking great

Dentists

I see you driving
Round town with the girl I love
and I'm like Haiku

Blank

"Blank" does rhyme with "Plank"
And that's all I have to say
So... how was your day?

Edgar Allan Poe

His best mystery
is "Murders of the Rue Morgue"
Read it if you dare.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

He wrote Sherlock Holmes
He really isn't known for much else
HE DID OTHER THINGS

Next topic: Horrorcore

Stupid fake genre
made up to start fashion fads
no one cares about


bass guitar

Do they make guitars
That are modeled after fish?
That's totally weird

Star Wars

I tried to blast you.
I will never be like you.
I am your father.

The Exorcist

A girl's head turns round.
The demon enters a priest.
He jumps to his death.

Octopi

I have eight damn legs.
Want to try that some time drunk?
Stay away from stairs.

Jimmy Page.

A great guitarist
No doubt, but he's not a god
Zeppelin rules though

Chula's reaction to me saying Jimmy's not a god.

You stupid *******
Jimmy Page is the saviour
**** you goddamn ****

Orthodontists.

He's counts for 2. FAIL!

Serious question: Where do you rank Page among greatest ever rock guitarists?

I'm counting these syllables on slurred speech, give me a break.

Top 10 probably. Zappa, Gary Lucas, Marc Ribot, Alex Skolnick, Jimi Hendrix, Thurston Moore are a few of the ones I rank above Page. I would call very few artists gods, that's a term that I don't dole out easily and it's usually granted to jazz or avant-garde artists (mostly because that's where my taste is oriented). Hendrix is the only one I'd call a god on that list, maybe Marc Ribot too, but not for his rock contribution.

They are all Sadists,
who love to see you suffer.
Don't forget your bands.

Urban Hatemonger

Holds life in his hands.
Wait, is he a she or he?
As a newb, not sure.

Batlord.