Trash!!!!!

Urban Hat€monger ? · 05-07-2010, 06:14 PM

Don't you just love it when you pick up a paper or a magazine or read a blog & some album gets totally & utterly trashed by the reviewer.

I do.

Post some of your favourite savagings here for us all to enjoy

Here's some of Gavin Martin's comments from The Mirror on the new Hole album I found amusing.

it is the work of a clapped-out force who has wasted time spending her considerable fortune getting on drugs, getting off drugs and the tiresome image manipulations of the Hollywood elite.

Hole here smell like LA hair metal fronted by Nickelback's Chad Kroeger in Bonnie Tyler drag.

The title track depicts an everywoman saved from drowning at the bottom of the ocean by the revelation that no one's coming to get her. Career prophecy? Possibly.

Letter To God is a heartbreaking confessional to a male deity - so much for progress - while Skinny Little Bitch sounds a bit better, like Flamejob-era Cramps. But there's no excuse for the mother of a teenager to challenge a girl her daughter's age to a bitchfight, threatening to kick her "scrawny ass".

Your turn....

gunnels · 05-07-2010, 06:19 PM

Most of the time I don't enjoy reading negative reviews, but I love this one.
A review of Conviction by Aiden.

Though I pride myself on being fair, I did use this album as punishment on my friend not giving me back FF6. Locked him up in a room for half an hour with loud speakers that could only be controlled by a remote which I had. Guilt ensued and for brief moments I compared my actions with those of Josef Stalin. Will I ever atone for the evil deeds commited that day? My heart is filled with dread...

Bulldog · 05-08-2010, 05:53 AM

This one of Babyshambles' Down In Albion's an old fav...

Quote:

Both the playing and the singing on this much-debated CD are absolutely pitiful, at best. It is possible to see a tiny germ of talent in Mr Doherty's words, in a sort-of E J Thribb pretentiousness, and he is supposed to be a very nice guy away from the lights. The live performances on the TV, unredeemably lamentable, tend to reinforce some people's view that this emperor is very definitely without clothes.

There is so much good music, new and old, that I cannot see why anybody should seek out this second-rate stuff. Even in these days of British New Labour mediocrity, wherein nobody can be "bad" at anything or "fail" at anything, by law, it is unacceptable. This band would have been booed off stage in any rural village hall in England in the sixties as insulting their audience. On the other hand, perhaps that is what Doherty is trying to get at in the title song ? If so, I duly remove my hat to him, but I doubt it somehow.

I bought this album in the belief from the publicity that there was flawed genius at work. There isn't. It's dreadful. I was not allowed to give it no stars. There is absolutely no excuse for rubbish like this to see the light of day - it makes Fall Out Boy (see my review of Cork Tree on Amazon.com) seem like Cream. Actually, on second thoughts, it makes Fall Out Boy sound at least one-tenth competent.

Spend your hard-earned on a road map of Eilat. It will be more interesting
than the meanderings of these awful people.

loveissucide · 05-08-2010, 07:25 AM

Quote:

Razorlight already proved in 2004 that the only thing worse than a precocious pop sensation is a stunted would-be liberal arts student with nothing to say, and here, just by gracing us with a physical copy of their second album, the band prove that those infamous types are one and the same. A mere listen to Razorlight will remind one that the word ‘sensational’ can also mean ‘presenting information in a way that is intended to provoke public interest and excitement, at the expense of accuracy.’ Now, it’s not that Razorlight themselves aren’t accurate; in fact, the exactitude of their first single, “In the Morning,” is a delight to behold, if you’re a money hungry record producer: their blandest Television incarnation yet struts out to the cues of an artificially conservative ensemble of guitar, bass, and drums, only to be followed by the reiteration, “In the morning, you know he won’t remember a thing,” and nine more exhibitions of pop pomp and lyrical dross. The solipsism and trite accounts of benders from the first album are still there, but the music has gone exceedingly soft. Variations of the original garage formula exist (“Fall to Pieces,” “Kirby’s House”), but only as cheery Paul Weller, or, dare I say it, Phil Collins retrospectives with expected idiotic openers like “Oh, one more drink and then I’ll go.” Yes, please go.

Remember how ****e Razorlight where? This is one of many,many pannings.

Rocknroll_Animal · 07-17-2010, 04:20 AM

The Horrors-Primary Colours-Is It Really That Good ? « The VPME

HAHAHAHAHA.

05-07-2010, 06:14 PM	#1 (permalink)
Urban Hat€monger ? The Sexual Intellectual Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Somewhere cooler than you Posts: 18,605	Trash!!!!! Don't you just love it when you pick up a paper or a magazine or read a blog & some album gets totally & utterly trashed by the reviewer. I do. Post some of your favourite savagings here for us all to enjoy Here's some of Gavin Martin's comments from The Mirror on the new Hole album I found amusing. it is the work of a clapped-out force who has wasted time spending her considerable fortune getting on drugs, getting off drugs and the tiresome image manipulations of the Hollywood elite. Hole here smell like LA hair metal fronted by Nickelback's Chad Kroeger in Bonnie Tyler drag. The title track depicts an everywoman saved from drowning at the bottom of the ocean by the revelation that no one's coming to get her. Career prophecy? Possibly. Letter To God is a heartbreaking confessional to a male deity - so much for progress - while Skinny Little Bitch sounds a bit better, like Flamejob-era Cramps. But there's no excuse for the mother of a teenager to challenge a girl her daughter's age to a bitchfight, threatening to kick her "scrawny ass". Your turn.... __________________ Urb's RYM Stuff Most people sell their soul to the devil, but the devil sells his soul to Nick Cave.

07-17-2010, 04:20 AM	#5 (permalink)
Rocknroll_Animal Music Addict Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Beautiful Gardens Posts: 65	The Horrors-Primary Colours-Is It Really That Good ? « The VPME HAHAHAHAHA. __________________ You make me __