Raine

Why do some guys when forced to side with either their girlfriend or their mom choose to remain neutral and let the hositlites between the said mom and girlfriend continue?

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A pair of powerful spectacles has sometimes sufficed to cure a person in love.

~ Friedrich Nietzsche

Urban Hat€monger ?

Because you can`t tell women anything so you just let them get on with it.

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explosions-in-my-pants

for one, I don't agree with the girlfriend and mother having problems.. because they shouldn't have enough conversation that a problem would arise out of it.. I mean when your married you can start to talk to each others parents because well weather each other likes it or not your there for good (well hopefully seeings how you'd be married) other then if your just a simple girlfriend, if fights get too awkard between parent and girlfriend the boyfriend might give up his family for you, ruin his life then blame it all on you and then you both have dragged out ****ty lives together or apart.. and or if he choose what his mom thinks then you be understanding and go oh well.. get over it.. and stay with him.. and hope that you and his mom are ok...

so in my opinion he should side with whomever he agrees with and then give his opinions as to why or why not he agrees and disagrees.. if not then things can just get messy and be ugly for a few days.. and have a weird awkward impack on the relationship.. maybe even a un-noticed one.. but it will uncover its self...The age difference is even to big for my liking.. when it comes to your ex's that you've dated.. there are limites.. I think at least I have them. I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 24 going on 25 and well I wouldn't go any older then that really well at least i can't see it happening.

I can tho understand your feelings towards the topic about your boyfriend and his mother. I mean its not fair that he wouldn't trsut you.. he should have ask his mother what she thought of you long before it got to this point.you don't need to do that if you live with someone thats older then 18, and its ok with your parents if its of the different sex....also with age back a long time ago it was normal for women to be 14 - 15 -16 years of age seeing men and marrying them with the men being in there late 20's.... whys it looked so down upon now?

keep in mind I wouldn't see a man EVER more then 10 years older then me, and when I would those ages I wouldn't see a man more then 5 years older then.. there are ages when its completely wrong and ages where its ok because of matureity.

oh and to me... every man that has a attaction for women with find a attaction to teenage women.. why? because well how do you know there teenagers for one.. by the time women are that age they pretty much look the way they will when there in there 20's.. so its only normal for a man to be attacted to a woman that young even if its only looks wise and not really any other way.. its not something that really can be controled you either are attacked to it or your not. Doesn't mean if your a 40 year old man that you should do something about it tho.. I mean just cause you grow older doesn't mean your taste for women does.. so if your wife was a hottie when you meet then you'll maybe always like hotties.. just don't do anythng about it.. anyways... there are limites more so for girls in high school.. but theres not always something wrong with the men.

Raine

wow this thread is old.

1) do guys lose interests inf riendships over periods of time?
2) what's it mean when a guy starts acting differently
3) is it possible for me to lose my male (best) friend to a girl friend (if he had one) in the sense that if he started dating how much would it effect our relationship
4) if you reject a guy (that is your friend for whatever reason) it is possible to still be friends. Right?
5) about those long awkward silences. . . . what do they really mean? or are guys just not always talkative all the time. Like I dunno how to explain it. . .

thanks MBers.

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A pair of powerful spectacles has sometimes sufficed to cure a person in love.

~ Friedrich Nietzsche

TrampInaTux

1) Well if it's a proper friendship then no... you should never lose interest in a good friendship...
2) He might like the person he is acting differently to, he might be thinking of her in a new light.
3) Yeah it is possible. If he's in a relationship with another girl then it could take a toll on your friendship, the same way it might take a toll on his friendship with other blokes. He might see it as he doesn't need the girl who is his friend anymore as he has a girlfriend. Unfortunately this isn't his fault, it might just be subconsciously.
4) Well kinda... I know some people who got rejected by friends and they still carried on being friends, but it was never quite the same... others handle it differently. Some spend the friendship trying to impress the girl, others spend it trying to belittle them as payback.
5) Well it's just nervousness around you... there's not much else to it... unless he's not a very talkative bloke...

explosions-in-my-pants

depends on why they were friends with you. If he has a thing for you then after a while he may get pissed off and just try to forget about you. If all he wanted was friendship then if any interest gets lost its because that normaly happens to people over time.how so? My friend stopped hanging out with all females after he started seeing his girlfriend... it really just depends on the trust between him and his girlfriend and how much he's willing to do for her.. she might not want him seeing you or any otehr girls any more.It is but trust me the guy never really gets over that.. cause he never hasa chance if you two are always best friends.
I had this happen to me before and he years later still told me loved me.
Everyone has them. Really just depends how comfortable you are with the person your having them with. People do run out of things to talk about every now and then.. and sometimes silence is just there and means nothing.
If that last question had to do with your best friend then I'm sure it depends on the conversation you two were having before hand.. OR just that you two have a comfortable line where you can have silence and it not be weird. But I 'm guesing you found it really awkward, so in any case then maybe your just worrying to much about whats going to happen with your friendship.

DontRunMeOver

Ok, these all apply to my own experience and aren't necessarily true across the board.

1) Only if
A - The friend has started to act like a tosser and doesn't look like stopping.
B - The friend or you have moved away from each other, so that you can't really hang out with them. If you can't do things with your friend so much then other friendships will start to become more interesting.

2) People alway 'act differently' that question is vague and is consequently useless.

3) If you mean that, if the relationship goes well, then his girlfriend will usurp you as his best female friend then YES. If you mean losing him as a friend entirely then probably NO, unless you yourself start acting annoying.

4) Yes.

5) Most guys don't have the same urge to talk constantly that a lot of women have. A lot of talking tires us out and sometimes we prefer just to sit around with our friends and not talk. If there is an 'awkward silence' then that means that you must not be talking too. If this is happening a lot then maybe it means you have lost whatever it was the two of you were talking about.

Oooh, wait, interesting thought I just had...
Just throwing an idea out here and this idea revolves around some assumptions, but maybe if your friend was interested in you then a lot of the conversations were based around what YOU were interested in. Maybe he gave precendence to the conversations topics that YOU started. You'd tend to do this if you had a crush on somebody.

If you've turned him down, then maybe he doesn't feel quite so interested in basing the conversations around your interests all of the time and maybe this leads to the awkward silences, when he doesn't really want to talk about your interests and you don't really know what he likes talking about, because the conversations have never really been about what he's interested in.

Just an idea, doesn't come from experience of romantic relationships, or failed attempts at them, but rather from friends that have annoyed me, their relationships and other observations like that.

****, that was long-winded.

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DontRunMeOver

Oh, and this isn't a dig at anybody, but remember that when you're asking questions about how guys think, responses by MEN are far more valuable to you than responses by WOMEN. Men know a lot about how men think, women know a lot about how women think and generally neither men nor women really know much about how the other gender think. They might know which actions get which reactions from the opposite sex, but this doesn't mean that they can really get into their psychology.

What I mean here is that I recommend that the girls assume that most of their female friend's assessments of guy's motivations, feelings, thoughts etc. are largely bull****. I would do the same when my male friends are trying to give advice about how women think. If you want to know about women, ask women, if you want to know about men, ask men. (That's why the thread title is great!).

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Urban Hat€monger ?

I would have thought any guy who was dating you would be grateful of any silence.

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