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View Poll Results: Hey. Did you just grab my ass?
Yes... 30 34.48%
From where I'm standing that is a physical impossibility 26 29.89%
Sh...Should I? 31 35.63%
Voters: 87. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 05-16-2013, 09:33 AM   #11911 (permalink)
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You should have started bringing in a dictionary and told everyone, "Due to recent events I think that Mr. Webster is desperately needed."
Haha, my wife said the same thing!

I don't think I've even mentioned some of the worst of the experience either. We had people, prompted by our brilliant foreman, trying to make deals with other jurors to vote a certain way on things if the other person changed their vote on something else (which is something the judge explicitly told us not to do). We had people switching their votes just because they wanted to leave. We had people who didn't understand the concept of "beyond a reasonable doubt" and were willing to convict based, literally, on "well he might have done it." We had a woman incapable of logical thought who looked like she was going to cry every single time repeated her opinion on the case (which she did incessantly). We had a guy who looked like fat, homeless pedophile who would frequently launch into bizarre metaphors that made sense to no one. And last but not least we had the foreman trying to get me thrown off the jury because I wasn't voting the same way as her. The whole thing was fucked.
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Old 05-16-2013, 09:36 AM   #11912 (permalink)
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Haha, my wife said the same thing!

I don't think I've even mentioned some of the worst of the experience either. We had people, including our brilliant foreman, trying to make deals with other jurors to vote a certain way on things if the other person changed their vote on something else (which is something the judge explicitly told us not to do). We had people switching their votes just because they wanted to leave. We had people who didn't understand the concept of "beyond a reasonable doubt" and were willing to convict based, literally, on "well he might have done it." We had a woman incapable of logical thought who looked like she was going to cry every single time repeated her opinion on the case (which she did incessantly). We had a guy who looked like fat, homeless pedophile who would frequently launch into bizarre metaphors that made sense to no one. And last but not least we had the foreman trying to get me thrown off the jury because I wasn't voting the same way as her. The whole thing was fucked.

Obviously these people have never watched Law and Order, or have never heard of Perry Mason. I'm thinking even Night Court would be a bit much for them to fathom.
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Old 05-16-2013, 09:49 AM   #11913 (permalink)
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I don't think I've even mentioned some of the worst of the experience either. We had people, prompted by our brilliant foreman, trying to make deals with other jurors to vote a certain way on things if the other person changed their vote on something else (which is something the judge explicitly told us not to do).
What? You mean like, "Hey, dude. I'll give you five bucks to give that asshole five to ten years"?
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There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-16-2013, 09:57 AM   #11914 (permalink)
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What? You mean like, "Hey, dude. I'll give you five bucks to give that asshole five to ten years"?
No, more like, "If you change your vote guilty on the major charge, I'll switch my votes to not guilty on two of the lesser charges."
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Old 05-16-2013, 09:21 PM   #11915 (permalink)
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So, today I flipped my shit and screamed at my mom's husband, and walked barefoot to my grandmother's because I thought he let the dog eat my shoes, when they were just hidden somewhere by someone. The thing is, things have been going missing, or mysteriously breaking when we aren't home and we're pretty sure it's him. I could go on about this, but I absolutely refuse to go back to my own house. I've straight up had enough, and I can't even live comfortably in my own house, so I'm just not going to live there anymore. My mom won't listen to my pleas of wanting to not live there anymore, and I'm about to just stop talking to her as well because not even my own mother listens to me. If this continues, I'm not sure what I'll do.
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Old 05-16-2013, 09:23 PM   #11916 (permalink)
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He sounds like a major scumbag. Sorry you have to deal with pieces of shit in your life.

I hate my boss and sort of wish he'd die.
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Old 05-17-2013, 12:18 AM   #11917 (permalink)
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No, more like, "If you change your vote guilty on the major charge, I'll switch my votes to not guilty on two of the lesser charges."
Janszoon, please keep telling us about Jury Duty because your stories are so entertaining!

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So, today I flipped my shit and screamed at my mom's husband, and walked barefoot to my grandmother's because I thought he let the dog eat my shoes, when they were just hidden somewhere by someone. The thing is, things have been going missing, or mysteriously breaking when we aren't home and we're pretty sure it's him. I could go on about this, but I absolutely refuse to go back to my own house. I've straight up had enough, and I can't even live comfortably in my own house, so I'm just not going to live there anymore. My mom won't listen to my pleas of wanting to not live there anymore, and I'm about to just stop talking to her as well because not even my own mother listens to me. If this continues, I'm not sure what I'll do.


I'm really sorry to hear that, I hope things get better for you
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Old 05-17-2013, 08:46 AM   #11918 (permalink)
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Janszoon, please keep telling us about Jury Duty because your stories are so entertaining!
Unfortunately I think he said that he's through with jury duty.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 05-17-2013, 09:14 AM   #11919 (permalink)
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Unfortunately I think he said that he's through with jury duty.
I can make some stuff up if you want though.
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Old 05-17-2013, 09:50 AM   #11920 (permalink)
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I can make some stuff up if you want though.
Sweet. Did you sentence the defendant to death?
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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