Music Banter - Are you satisfied with your gender?

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I don't know why girls don't consider the better alternative to wishing they were male.

And that is not giving a flying f*ck what society thinks. Vanilla says that men are more carefree but I don't think that's a genetic cause it's just social conditioning, and it's not really true that men are more carefree they just have different issues, again not caused by their gender but the preconditions set for them because of their gender.

It seems that the main reason people here have trouble with their gender male or female is that they are tired of being restricted because of their gender, but it isn't the actual gender that's denying you certain freedoms, it's the social stigma surrounding it. But society is made up of f*ckwads and instead of wishing you could fit in you just shouldn't give a sh*t what other people say about you. There's nothing a man can do that a woman can't also do careerwise (except competing in sports that people actually watch, but f*ck sports) if the motivation is there.

Quote:

Originally Posted by TumorAttitude (Post 893784)

Okay, let me disclaimer this: I am a kind of slutty, average looking girl.

I hate being a girl. Even as I type this, I reconsider, freaking out a little. About 2/3 of MB regulars assume I'm the default (dude), which is the way I prefer it. I wish I was a dude so freaking much it hurts.

I'm not that much of a lesbian and I guess having a vagina is okay. The period thing is kind of terrible but Midol, Ibuprofin, and bitching help loads. I hate being a girl because I feel like I'll constantly carry the burden of gender with me and every time I say or do something stupid (SHUT THE FUCK UP FASHO) it will be attributed to my gender. I do and say stupid things in real life. I write stupid things on Musicbanter. Its not because I'm a chick. Its because I'm dumb/lazy. Sometimes, I feel like guys don't have gender.

Guys are people and girls are girls. When I think from a sociologist's perspective, I could say the same thing about race. I sort of wish I was black because I have a weird fetish for black chicks and if I was one, I would probably just fwap to a mirror all day long but then again, I don't because carrying the burden of gender AND race with me would just me majahlay suckay. I would probably overanalyze everything ever done or said to me so much that I couldn't function in everyday life.

There's the sleeping around thing too. Even a lot of dudes who've clensed themselves of anti-women ways of thinking feel weird about girls who have had more sexual partners then them. Its just the way society works. I can't do what I want and be judged the same way. I guess I could fake it but since I analyze everything to a T, I'm not a very good liar so I usually either refrain from doing fun sexxxy stuffz or cry and shrivel up into a ball from guilt afterwards. I can't be one of those cool girls that rises above the stigma and has fun. I can't. I feel like I'm really doing something WRONG, especially if I'm really enjoying it.

The biggest thing though, I guess, is my gender getting in the way of my goals. I'm a feminist. Other feminists are nice to me (and the real ones are nice and accepting). Me having penis envy is okay. Its personal. And other girls are great at things. I like people with my gender. I'm not a woman-hating-woman by any stretch. I love girls and am jealous of tons of them. But I feel like I'm not good enough at the things I want to do to reach my goals and I feel like maybemaybeMAYBE, just maybe, if I was male, I would be better at everything. Actually, maybe if I was male, I wouldn't have to be better. I wouldn't have to prove myself so much and would get by with what I could do.

I'll just end this by saying that I don't have the answers and whats right for me isn't right for everybody. Maybe you're a dude and you'd trade with me in a heartbeat. Maybe you're a chick and you're shaking you're head thinking of how much you love your 'giney. Thats okay. But I would be so much better off if I was born a boy. I feel it in my soul. Girlhood just doesn't sit quite right with me. So thats it. I penis envy hard. I'm awaiting the inevitable STFU YOU STUPID BITCH comments. I hope this thread dies soon and you guys think I'm a badass, tattooed MALE.

I don't find the guy in that avatar to be badass at all really. He looks like a douche to me. I definitely prefer you as the way you are.

But whatever floats your boat.

Quote:

Originally Posted by TumorAttitude (Post 893784)

There's the sleeping around thing too. Even a lot of dudes who've clensed themselves of anti-women ways of thinking feel weird about girls who have had more sexual partners then them. Its just the way society works. I can't do what I want and be judged the same way. I guess I could fake it but since I analyze everything to a T, I'm not a very good liar so I usually either refrain from doing fun sexxxy stuffz or cry and shrivel up into a ball from guilt afterwards. I can't be one of those cool girls that rises above the stigma and has fun. I can't. I feel like I'm really doing something WRONG, especially if I'm really enjoying it.

Like, how a guy who sleeps with a lot of girls is a hero of sorts, a 'stud.' Whereas a girl who sleeps with a lot of guys is dirty, rank, and a 'slut.' It's double standards yes, and it sucks, but I think these kind of societal issues happen with both genders. I find my gender has held me back in life many times but I could say the same for guys that I know. Like boobs said, it's all social stigma.

However, the biggest thing that I dislike about being a girl is the biological/ physical factor. For one, having babies. Who wants to go through 9 months of hell and then the most painful thing commonly experienced by human beings? Followed by months and months of sore, swollen tits and feeling uncomfortable as fuck and tired from no sleep and having lost your career? Because as much as men are becoming active parents in modern society, evidence shows that the mothers are still the primary carers of kids.

Periods are also shit. I don't know how you could say you enjoy bleeding litres of blood from your insides every single month. Some girls have periods with no pain. Some do. Periods fucking hurt and are uncomfortable and just not fun.

Being on the contraceptive pill also sucks balls. For many it doesn't, but for many there are a plethora of really shit and uncomfortable side effects. Most guys these days that I've met or been involved have the attitude that now that we are living in a modern society with medical advancements such as the pill, they don't have to wear condoms or take any precautions themselves because girls can just take the pill. The pill sucks, and I've gone through so many different types but there is still a huge list of horrible side effects like weight gain, headaches, nausea, mood changes, brain fog, and more.

There are a huge more list of things but I can't be bothered going into them really and I'll probably be flamed or set off some kind of crazy war again. Both genders are disadvantaged in different ways, experience different things, and have hardships with different aspects of their lives. These are just some of the things I dislike about being a girl. Which is not to say I wish I was a man... sometimes, fleetingly, I just think about it.

Also I find it depressing that women would rather wish they had d*cks so they could fit in better than to continue fighting for equal rights in all respects. That's just a cop out if you ask me. I also feel like it's giving in to the idea that men really are superior to women and that certainly bothers me. Women can only have equal rights AS women if they fight for it. My criticism of radical feminism has always been that they seem like they want very badly just to be men which I don't consider true feminism at all.

I think both sexes should take pride in their gender distinctions. Yeah I did vote "not sure" on this thing, because I do think being a chick would be interesting but on the other side I'm not really disatisfied with being male, there are reasons I'm glad to be one and I think sex changes are stupid. I think it's best to be satisfied with who you are instead of wanting to persue some unrealistic ideal about yourself.

It's true that women do have issues that nothing a man has can compare to. Such as pregnancy. I have no idea how women do it but I think that perseverance is a big reason why I admire women a lot more than I do men. Any idiot male can learn how to play basketball, it's the women who are keeping the human race going in the end.

Quote:

Being on the contraceptive pill also sucks balls. For many it doesn't, but for many there are a plethora of really shit and uncomfortable side effects. Most guys these days that I've met or been involved have the attitude that now that we are living in a modern society with medical advancements such as the pill, they don't have to wear condoms or take any precautions themselves because girls can just take the pill. The pill sucks, and I've gone through so many different types but there is still a huge list of horrible side effects like weight gain, headaches, nausea, mood changes, brain fog, and more.

If one of the alternatives is getting your lazy ass boyfriend to use a condom then I say you tell the f*cker to get on that sh*t because that's just not fair. You get the worst end of the stick if you do get pregnant, the least guys can do is make their own sacrifices.

Quote:

Originally Posted by boo boo (Post 893798)

Also I find it depressing that women would rather wish they had ****s so they could fit in better than to contiue fighting for equal rights in all respects. That's just a cop out if you ask me. I also feel like it's giving in to the idea that men really are superior to women and that certainly bothers me. Women can only have equal rights AS women if they fight for it. My criticism of radical feminism has always been that they seem like they want very badly just to be men which I don't consider true feminism at all.

I think both sexes should take pride in their gender distinctions. Yeah I did vote "not sure" on this thing, because I do think being a chick would be interesting but on the other side I'm not really disatisfied with being male, there are reasons I'm glad to be one and I think sex changes are stupid. I think it's best to be satisfied with who are instead of wanting to persue some unrealistic ideal about yourself.

It's true that women do have issues that nothing a man has can compare to. Such as pregnancy. I have no idea how women do it but I think that perseverance is a big reason I admire women more than I do men.

I'd never thought I'd say this to you in regards to this particular topic, but I agree with you boo. In regards to women's right, if women just want to be like men or would rather be men, it's pretty much like they are copping out and admitting that men are superior to women.

That being said, the poll question was 'are you satisfied with your gender' as opposed to 'would you rather be the opposite gender' so I answered it 'no'... retrospectively I should have answered 'yes' or 'not sure.'

But yeah I could have said it better myself.

Quote:

Originally Posted by boo boo (Post 893798)

If one of the alternatives is getting your lazy ass boyfriend to use a condom then I say you tell the f*cker to get on that sh*t because that's just not fair.

Damn straight. I do in the end. But you wouldn't believe the amount of guys who think it's not fair that they have to wear a condom when girls can simply take a little pill every day. Because condoms are "uncomfortable" - don't get me started on the uncomforts girls have to experience in terms of sex/ sexual health/ contraception/ reproduction/ etc!

Yeah the REAL question was meant to be "would you rather be the opposite gender".

And it's good to know at least a few girls are satisfied with their sexy selves. :D

Maybe John Travolta would prefer you as a dude but I wouldn't. :p:

Quote:

Originally Posted by boo boo (Post 893798)

and I think sex changes are stupid. I think it's best to be satisfied with who are instead of wanting to persue some unrealistic ideal about yourself.

.

Wait, hold on here partner. People who go through a sex change are transgender, meaning their gender identity doesn't conform with their biological gender. It's incredibly dismissive and shows a deep lack of understanding to simply say that everyone should learn to accept what they've been dealt with by some random biological occurrence. Obviously a sex-change is a major step which no one decides to go through without a significant amount of forethought. People who do decide to go through it usually come to a decision that they can't continue living in the wrong body and would be much happier once their inner identity matches their biological one. It's a disorder which thanks to modern medicine has a successful cure. And I don't see anything stupid about curing people who are deeply unhappy and giving them a chance at a better life...:\

That's not what I mean. Yes I understand that there exists a biological condition in which people have a body of one sex and the mentality of another, in that case it's a deformity and there's nothing wrong with fixing it.

I myself do feel somewhat like a girl trapped in a dude's body sometimes, but it's more of a "what if" kinda thing and not something that puts me into a deep depression, I don't have such feelings strongly enough that I'm okay with f*cking up my body and mutilating my penis. So being a dude is cool with me. :laughing:

But in this case I think some women just want to be men not because they have this disorder but because society does it's damnest to make women feel inferior to men, as appliances and nothing more, so they give in to the idea that men have it better and perhaps they do because social stigma enables them that way. Even generations of advancements in civil rights hasn't completely eliminated that ancient zeitgeist from our society. I don't at all believe it's an impossible task but it certainly isn't an easy one, it's hard to challenge something that has been around for so damn long.

And to call it depressing is an understatement. Instead of women accepting themselves as something unique and important and embracing our distinctions and the fact that we each need each other equally and have our own strengths and weaknesses, damn near everyone just accepts the socially distorted view that yeah men are superior cuz hey c'mon just look at how many "successful" men there are compared to women and blah blah blah.

It's stupid and the only reason men still DO run the world is because we don't challenge this worldview often enough.

Quote:

Originally Posted by boo boo (Post 893805)

It's stupid and the only reason men still DO run the world is because we don't challenge this worldview often enough.

I don't have much to contribute to the discussion, so don't mind me.

But reading this made me incredibly happy. Someone really gets it.