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Old 09-17-2013, 08:05 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default The WTF??? thread

This thread is dedicated to stuff you've seen that made you think "WHAT THE F_UCK???" Maybe it even made you blurt it out loud. This covers weird, inexplicable behavior or inexplicable objects you've seen.

I'm ruling out UFOs. I don't give a s-hit about that stuff. Unless it is absolutely spectacular, save it. I'm looking more for the stuff you've seen that just made you pause for a second and say to yourself, "What the f-uck??"

I'll kick it off. Back in '85 I was stationed in the Philadelphia Naval Shipyard (which doesn't exist anymore) and one day, I came up out of the subway onto a street I can't remember the name of now. I don't think it was Chestnut but maybe it is. As I hit the sidewalk, there was nobody on the street at all. It was momentarily deserted. Before long, there would be people or cars going by but I caught it at a sleepy moment.

I saw only one other person, walking towards me--a middle aged to elderly woman. She walked purposefully and with an even tread. She had a purse swinging on her arm and her palm was facing up. She had on a little hat and a necklace that looked like pearls--typical stuff for an older woman.

But as she got closer to me, I realized to my shock that she was choking--horribly. Her eyes were turned up towards the sky and her tongue was stick ing out and quivering. She was making a horrible rasping sound as she walked--"GHGHGGHGH-AGHGHGHGH-UGHHAHGHGHGHGH!"

I was so shocked that I stopped in my tracks and just looked at her as she passed not 4 feet from me. She took no notice of me whatsoever but just walked past me still choking. I got a good look at her profile as she passed. I'll never forget it. I can still see it. Her eyes thrust up towards the sky kind of flickering, if you know what I mean. Her tongue jutting out of her mouth which was wide open. Her tongue quivering back and forth between her lips. Yet she walked with purpose. She wasn't stumbling about aimlessly. Never appealed to me for help. She walked like she knew exactly where she was going and didn't seem to be in a hurry to get there. As she passed me I heard, "AAGHGHGHGHCHCHCHH-AAAGHGHGGHH" as though an invisible hand were strangling her but she wasn't going to let that stop her from going about her business.

I turned to watch her as she passed and she just walked down the same subway steps I had just come up and vanished into the darkness. I just stood there a second staring after her thinking about that Alice Cooper song--"Ballad of Dwight Frye" where he sings, "I ran into the street / I saw a man who was choking there / I guess he couldn't breathe /Said to myself this is very strange / I'm glad it wasn't me." And I wondered if whoever wrote those lyrics saw the same kind of thing I just did. To this day, I still wonder about that.
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Old 09-17-2013, 08:15 PM   #2 (permalink)
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A co-worker told me this one: he was heading home from work and was on the expressway which was moving slowly in the rush hour traffic. At one point, he looked down at the curb and saw something so horrible that it took him a moment to realize was it was: a middling sized dog in a crouched position. What was horrible about it was that it had no head and no front paws. Both had been chopped clean off--seemingly in the same fell swoop. Like a large blade wielded with savage speed cut right through the dog's neck and front paws.

The rest of the animal was intact--back, belly, back legs, tail. He wasn't sure what kind of dog it had once been. I offered that perhaps a large truck ran over its front section as it tried to cross the freeway. But he said there was nothing else there. Surely, if the dog met its end that way, the head and paws would have left a nasty stain on the concrete but there was nothing. If someone had left it there, why? And they would have had to pose it since it was sitting upright which would be very unlikely if it was pushed or thrown from a vehicle.

He said when he first saw it, it took him a second to realize that he was looking down the bloody stump of its open throat. "It was sicker than sick," he said.
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Old 09-17-2013, 08:19 PM   #3 (permalink)
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That last one isn't "wtf," it's tradgic.
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Old 09-17-2013, 08:25 PM   #4 (permalink)
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once i was walking home from school and this naked guy with nothing but bunny ears on yelled "COME OVER HERE FOR SOME LOVINS" and now i am afraid to take that shortcut home. he was.... hairy. and had the saggiest balls i have every seen.
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Old 09-17-2013, 08:41 PM   #5 (permalink)
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warning - extremely disturbing video interview

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Old 09-18-2013, 04:53 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Old 09-18-2013, 05:31 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Old 09-18-2013, 08:35 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Old 11-18-2013, 02:36 PM   #9 (permalink)
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once i was walking home from school and this naked guy with nothing but bunny ears on yelled "COME OVER HERE FOR SOME LOVINS" and now i am afraid to take that shortcut home. he was.... hairy. and had the saggiest balls i have every seen.
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Old 11-18-2013, 02:40 PM   #10 (permalink)
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You think that's funny??? It fecking pisses me off, I'd tear that pervert's arm off and beat him to death with it.
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