Men in your 20's, is a kid a deal breaker?

grindy · 08-04-2015, 11:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fiddler

That seems to be a common attitude and I think a lot of it comes from the general lack of upbringings of other people's children. I could be mistaken, of course, but it seems like to me part of the appeal factor dropping for having kids or not having kids is their overall behavior. Kids can be well behaved, but it depends on how you raise them. I mean sure, they're messy, and loud, but those are some of the best memories you're ever going to have. It's a pleasure and honor to see your kid grow up and know that you had some part in hopefully making them a good person and functioning adult.

I just don't find children at all cute and without that filter they are just not that much fun to be around,
regardless of good or bad behaviour.
I certainly don't hate children and I'm not saying I'm never ever going to have kids
That'd be naive, people change.
In some way I'd even be glad, if that instinct kicked in,
I'm sure there is much happiness in it.
I have a half-brother who is 15 years younger than me,
he's a good kid and I love him, but I never felt any real connection and
I can't wait for him to grow up so we can really hang out as equals.

~~Cuthbert~~ · 08-05-2015, 12:07 AM

Yes it is. Would not see a woman with a child.

fiddler · 08-05-2015, 12:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by grindy

I just don't find children at all cute and without that filter they are just not that much fun to be around,
regardless of good or bad behaviour.
I certainly don't hate children and I'm not saying I'm never ever going to have kids
That'd be naive, people change.
In some way I'd even be glad, if that instinct kicked in,
I'm sure there is much happiness in it.
I have a half-brother who is 15 years younger than me,
he's a good kid and I love him, but I never felt any real connection and
I can't wait for him to grow up so we can really hang out as equals.

And that's perfectly fine, kids aren't for everybody, nor are they for every stage of life.

Key · 08-05-2015, 12:28 AM

I don't like the concept of "you'll change your mind when you're older". People ask me if I will ever have kids when i'm older, and I don't understand why the answer "no" isn't an acceptable answer until i'm a certain age. I don't give a **** if i'm not old enough for people's standards, I know that right now and anytime in the future, I don't want kids. Just because i'm not in my mid 30's or 40's doesn't mean i'm wrong.

OccultHawk · 08-05-2015, 04:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ki

I don't like the concept of "you'll change your mind when you're older". People ask me if I will ever have kids when i'm older, and I don't understand why the answer "no" isn't an acceptable answer until i'm a certain age. I don't give a **** if i'm not old enough for people's standards, I know that right now and anytime in the future, I don't want kids. Just because i'm not in my mid 30's or 40's doesn't mean i'm wrong.

Alright. I felt that way and I meant it. So good copy.

Guybrush · 08-05-2015, 05:21 AM

I didn't use to like kids. Then I became an uncle, got a bit more mature, worked in a kinder garden for a bit before my career started, got established .. and at some point I also realized that while getting drunk with your friends every friday is fun, somewhere down the line you'll have done it hundreds of times and it becomes a sad rut. Every time you play a new FPS game, it's on average a little less of a new experience. On average, every next time you travel some place or watch some movie or eat a banana or whatever, the experience is a little less fresh. My life is good, but also blander and less dramatic. While I didn't want kids earlier, I now see it as one of the great adventures I have left. And I'm sorry if this sounds cheesy, but I also hope to reexperience the wonders of the world through my future children.

I would prefer to do all this with kids that are, biologically speaking, my own so a woman having her own kids with a different father would count as a negative. How negative depends on how many kids are involved, how they behave, how their father(s) is/are involved etc.

It's definitely not a deal breaker.

Trollheart · 08-05-2015, 05:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

I hear ya. About how old are you?

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

How old is the kid or in other words how old were you when he or she was conceived?

How funny if these two replies had got messed up! Ki has just turned 8?

grindy · 08-05-2015, 05:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tore

I didn't use to like kids. Then I became an uncle, got a bit more mature, worked in a kinder garden for a bit before my career started, got established .. and at some point I also realized that while getting drunk with your friends every friday is fun, somewhere down the line you'll have done it hundreds of times and it becomes a sad rut. Every time you play a new FPS game, it's on average a little less of a new experience. On average, every next time you travel some place or watch some movie or eat a banana or whatever, the experience is a little less fresh. My life is good, but also blander and less dramatic. While I didn't want kids earlier, I now see it as one of the great adventures I have left. And I'm sorry if this sounds cheesy, but I also hope to reexperience the wonders of the world through my future children.

I would prefer to do all this with kids that are, biologically speaking, my own so a woman having her own kids with a different father would count as a negative. How negative depends on how many kids are involved, how they behave, how their father(s) is/are involved etc.

It's definitely not a deal breaker.

That is a great post and a possible development that might eventually lead me to wanting kids, although I'm still very, very sceptical about the whole thing.

OccultHawk · 08-05-2015, 05:49 AM

I do not want to experience childhood again vicariously through my children. Not only would it not be reinvigorating it would be positively depressing.

grindy · 08-05-2015, 05:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

I do not want to experience childhood again vicariously through my children. Not only would it not be reinvigorating it would be positively depressing.

Because you didn't like your childhood or because you think that childhood is generally not a good time?

08-05-2015, 05:21 AM	#26 (permalink)
Guybrush Juicious Maximus III Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Scabb Island Posts: 6,525	I didn't use to like kids. Then I became an uncle, got a bit more mature, worked in a kinder garden for a bit before my career started, got established .. and at some point I also realized that while getting drunk with your friends every friday is fun, somewhere down the line you'll have done it hundreds of times and it becomes a sad rut. Every time you play a new FPS game, it's on average a little less of a new experience. On average, every next time you travel some place or watch some movie or eat a banana or whatever, the experience is a little less fresh. My life is good, but also blander and less dramatic. While I didn't want kids earlier, I now see it as one of the great adventures I have left. And I'm sorry if this sounds cheesy, but I also hope to reexperience the wonders of the world through my future children. I would prefer to do all this with kids that are, biologically speaking, my own so a woman having her own kids with a different father would count as a negative. How negative depends on how many kids are involved, how they behave, how their father(s) is/are involved etc. It's definitely not a deal breaker. __________________ Something Completely Different

08-05-2015, 12:07 AM	#22 (permalink)
~~Cuthbert~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: The Black Country Posts: 8,827	Yes it is. Would not see a woman with a child.

08-05-2015, 12:28 AM	#24 (permalink)
Key . Join Date: Dec 2010 Posts: 13,153	I don't like the concept of "you'll change your mind when you're older". People ask me if I will ever have kids when i'm older, and I don't understand why the answer "no" isn't an acceptable answer until i'm a certain age. I don't give a **** if i'm not old enough for people's standards, I know that right now and anytime in the future, I don't want kids. Just because i'm not in my mid 30's or 40's doesn't mean i'm wrong.

08-05-2015, 05:49 AM	#29 (permalink)
OccultHawk one-balled nipple jockey Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Dirty Souf Biatch Posts: 22,033	I do not want to experience childhood again vicariously through my children. Not only would it not be reinvigorating it would be positively depressing.