hope everything works out for you and the family Chula, seems like you guys have been through hell and back over the last few years.

Any reason for this?

not exactly. when i was younger i used to have anxiety attacks fairly reguarly during the night because i would scare myself thinking about death. never been religious and i can't think of death as anything else but being nothingness forever.

just the other day i was laying in bed and it all came back to me, first time ive had an anxiety attack in well over 3 years. i haven't had another one since but it's just remained in the back of my mind since.

Get drunk. It's what Superman would say if he could be here.

.

.

It wants you to light up a Holy Spliff with the Holy Pages of The Book.

I thought that was such an obvious disclaimer I didn't mention it.
You'd think they would have given you some information first. I mean, you could just be a deadbeat dad.

Are you a deadbeat dad? ;)
Ever work for the Samartians? :laughing:
Reminds me of that scene in Sudden Impact where the bad guy picks up the phone and snarls "Who the fuck is this?"
Me too. July 6
ftfy

And they're hell to run down, aren't they?
A new low?
The only spirit Qwertyy wants is (say it with me, everyone....)

I don't think I can go a few minutes without being very aware of it.
Accept it, get used to it.

Tomorrow morning is the full body CT scan. No more speculation. The results will either be a HUGE sigh of relief, or a sledgehammer to the skull of my family and close friends. Based on all of the blood work and weight loss my doctor is most concerned about my pancreas, prostate, and liver. If you look at the stats, those three are the holy trinity of death for guys in my age group.

It's 12:55 and I highly doubt I'm going to sleep tonight. The brave and funny facade is gone. I'm scared ****less.

Remember the scene with Anton Chigurh and the gas station attendant?

I feel like the gas station attendant right now.

.

:rofl:

I'll take your well wishes wholeheartedly.

I will pray for you, too.

I forgot your first name (Ked?) so I'll just say THANK YOU Mrs. Mord!

I will kidnap a baby and send it through a wood chipper then use its guts to create a pentagram then with 6 black candles around it and 1 white candle in the middle of it to call upon the dark lord to use his power to help you Chula.

I'll also rub a Buddha belly and put a jihad on an infidel for you too.

Sending positive vibes your way Chula. Best of luck today.

Best of luck, man. We're all thinking of you. Except Batty. ;) Seriously, fingers crossed and though I'm not a praying man I'll get Karen to say a prayer for you. I'm sure everything will be all right. Let us know as soon as. Be well.

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I'll be thinking of you too, Chula. I can understand that the anxiety must be terrible. Good Luck.

I think something happens to our circumstances as we get older and it can be summoned up by these two quotes:-

When you're young: "As soon as you're awake, there's a train to take that looks like the easy way out."
As you get older: "Sooner or later, it all gets real."

For me, confronting what's real is a lesson that takes a lifetime to learn.

I don't think ugly can spread to your liver, pancreas, or prostate, but good luck anyway, bro.

Can relate. Posted a thread on here about it. I have accepted it and it doesn't worry me as much any more, it's natural and we all go through it. No reason for me to believe that my exit won't be the same as my entrance and I will remember nothing. Maybe you will get to that point soon.

I also think of the pros, nothingness = everything I worry about or hate will be gone and can no longer affect me.

Think I said before a couple months back it is worse at night when you can't sleep.

Good luck mate.

My baby sister, who is bedbound, suffering from MS (Multiple Sclerosis) - she is a big fan of Jesus and has unshakable faith.

The War On Drugs is not good. Not only the actual war being waged on drugs (which I'm really kinda not too opposed too) but especially the band. Their brand of soft-rock, psychedelia sound does nothing for me and whoever hypes them up (especially people at festivals) need to reconsider their lives and maybe start listening to better music. The War On Drugs Can Suck My Dick.

Did they ruin your Benji set?

Hope it goes well!

Check my health journal for the CT results.

For most of the post I thought you were talking about a courthouse and was kind of confused.

I was hoping there'd be a frog involved.

Me too. When the post begins "Went to a new court" I see mindfulness in his only suit, nervous and sweating... :laughing:

I thought the same thing but didn't hear about a traffic ticket or anything but once I saw that little picture thing. It clicked that it was the b-ball court.

I think I will write about my day yesterday because it was rather exciting. I am an Admissions Coordinator at a school for adults. I enroll people quite often and have been doing so for a long time. I have never ever ever had an experience like I had yesterday. So I am awaiting my last appointment of the day, finally he (or is it a she?) get's here. I bring he (she?) back to my office and I am starting the enrollment process "they" inform me "they" are a female going through the transition to be a male, and they would like to referred to as male. OK, i'm cool with that, no big deal. So we start the process and one minute later, he asks me for my trash can and I am thinking "Oh you need to throw something away" NO HE THREW UP twice into my trash can. I have an office and I had the door closed, naturally, I am gagging and praying I will not puke also because after all he has my trash can so...... Anyway, we move past that (he does not offer to take the trash out or anything). Well after that he starts talking and talking and talking, some would say like an individual on methamphetamines. Being an addict in recovery, I can spot this stuff a mile away. So the rest of the enrollment is him talking and talking and talking and me trying to hurry this process A. because of throw up and B. blabbering drug addicts get annoying and C. its time to go home. At the tail end of this conversation (when I am mentioning bringing drugs and/or alcohol into the school will result in immediate expulsion) he tells me I do not have to worry about that because he is in recovery and going to the methadone clinic every morning. OK GREAT personally for me, methadone and recovery are never in the same sentence unless of course "methadone was not a good way to start my recovery." I can't say anything at this point, just listen nod... whatever. So the nodding out is starting and I am obliged to tell this person it is time to wrap this up and we can finish next week. Then I went home and didn't get laid. Thank GOD it's ****ING Friday.

Cool username! :beer:

Thank you... LOVE him

If I knew you better I'd post a TL;DR gif like an *******, but as you're a newbie I'll just say that some paragraph breaks would make that much less of a daunting wall of text.

Just getting into season three now. Great show, and this is from someone who saw and loved the original.

Damn it. Got off work at 4pm and gotta go to bed no later than midnight to be back by 6am. Now I gotta fit a day's drinking into 7 hours and probably be hella hungover on a busy-as-**** day of the week.

Ah, truly 'tis said: Work is the curse of the drinking classes! :laughing: :beer:

Luckily my motivation to drink makes up for my lack in most other endeavors.