You're definitely invited to mine: that's the entertainment sorted anyway! :)

Did you put on a sweater vest and boat shoes?

All my neighbors do is blasting sh*tty music. Have they heard of headphones? 'cause they need 'em.

Have sex with their dog.

This is the logical thing to do in this scenario.

talentless neighbors
 

In different apartments there’s one guy that plays the drums and another the bass

They’ve both been at it for a couple years

I don’t even think they’ve met

They’re both exactly the same. They dick around on their instruments but never play anything. The drummer can’t keep a beat and the bass player has never once played a bass line. I’ve talked to both of them and they definitely aren’t fans of the avant-garde if that’s what you’re thinking.

I’m not a musician but what’s the point of dicking around at random forever? Why don’t they learn some scales or beats or songs or something? It’s like they’re both ****ing retarded but they’re not. They’re normal intelligence. They’re just completely directionless with their instruments.

Even though I can’t play any instruments I feel like I could still teach them. Like bass dude, this is a scale do re mi fa so la ti do

Drummer kick your bass drum at a steady pace click the high hat twice as fast hit the snare every second time you kick the bass drum

I mean wtf???

Ive been banging my hands on my desk and knees for 20 yrs and i still suck. :(

I've had two housemates, one with a bass, and the other with an acoustic guitar, and neither could really advance themselves beyond playing a few notes of a few songs that they liked. I think they just do it as something to do, and to keep their minds busy.

That’s wigged out I wrote almost exactly the same thing twice

Like scary

Tell them that they are great. Build up their spirits. Book them a gig and let the harsh reality of life crush their souls, as the crowd berates them. Problem solved.