Cheating...

djchameleon · 09-15-2017, 04:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolverinewolfweiselpigeon

Right, and everyone who's polyam cheats lol. Polyamory is an agreement and commitment to relationship dynamics, not necessarily an orientation.

Exactly, it seems like Lucem thinks it's an orientation.

You don't think that do you Lucem?

DwnWthVwls · 09-15-2017, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djchameleon

Exactly, it seems like Lucem thinks it's an orientation.

You don't think that do you Lucem?

I've never heard it not used that way... You can be poly and in a monogomous relationship, probably won't be happy, but I know a couple that ran into that issue. It's a relationship orientation ?? (for lack of a better description). What else do you call somebody who doesn't cheat (on their partners behalf), but has a desire to be with or fall in love with other people?

Found this with a quick google search, and it describes pretty well my understanding of the modern usage:

Quote:

Polyamory means having multiple romantic relationships at the same time, with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.

An open relationship is a relationship where the parties are free to take new partners.

The terms both fall under the heading of "ethical nonmonogamy," but they are not synonymous. You can combine them or do one without the other.

If your relationship is polyamorous and open, then it's kosher for you to take new relationships, and you may fall in love with your partners. My relationships work this way.

If your relationship is polyamorous and closed, then you have more than one partner but have agreed not to take any new ones. For example, you could have a closed triad, a group of three people who are only involved with each other and don't get involved with anyone else.

If your relationship is open and not polyamorous, then you may take new partners, but these connections are not supposed to be romantic. Swingers often have sex outside their main relationship, but keep it casual.

If your relationship is neither open nor polyamorous, you're probably monogamous.

djchameleon · 09-15-2017, 05:07 PM

Knowledge and consent of everyone is the key part.

She might be happy being in a polyamorous relationship but all parties would have to agree to it ahead of time.

Lucem Ferre · 09-15-2017, 06:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by djchameleon

Exactly, it seems like Lucem thinks it's an orientation.

You don't think that do you Lucem?

If polyamory is people that love multiple people rather than one, then yes it kind of fits in that area. Maybe that concept is new to her and she really never realized that love doesn't have to be monogamous like we're taught all our lives. Is that really a controversial way of thinking about it or do you people think I'm justifying her cheating or what?

Stephen · 09-15-2017, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thelonious Monkey

no, feeling really stressed out that i might lose a friend over this. I meet her next on saturday and im being told I need to confront her or leave her. It's a ****ing hard decision man and I don't know know what she's gunna say.

So you two were involved before her current relationship? How did you feel about her meeting someone else?

Thelonious Monkey · 09-15-2017, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by oj simpson

And I'm gonna be straight up with you, too. If you "love her" after having ****ed her your whole life... I dunno man it just seems a bit late to "make a move" at this point. Move on with your life.

You're not related to her right??

Her grandma lived next door to me, so she'd visit every weekend. I don't really know exactly how young we were when it started, but it was pretty damn young. I'll take people's advice and end what we're doing.

Thelonious Monkey · 09-15-2017, 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by oj simpson

how old are you?

20.

The Batlord · 09-15-2017, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by oj simpson

And I'm gonna be straight up with you, too. If you "love her" after having ****ed her your whole life... I dunno man it just seems a bit late to "make a move" at this point. Move on with your life.

You're not related to her right??

Wpnfire · 09-15-2017, 08:35 PM

You're young. If it turns out badly for you, the two of you will probably reconcile by the time you're thirty.

~~Cuthbert~~ · 09-15-2017, 09:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elphenor

usually when enough time has passed where you can reconcile you no longer care anyway there's so many other people they're everywhere it's almost gross

Agreed.

09-15-2017, 08:35 PM	#39 (permalink)
Wpnfire Dragon Join Date: Jan 2014 Location: Kansas, United States Posts: 2,744	You're young. If it turns out badly for you, the two of you will probably reconcile by the time you're thirty. __________________ Last.FM My RYM Ratings *My Glitchwave Beta Profile*