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Old 10-06-2017, 06:00 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Post films the critics were wrong about

Post films you believe the critics were completely wrong about.

Me, Myself & Irene
Rotton Tomatoes score: 48%

Critics point to a lack of depth in the plot but sometimes I don’t want someone’s idea of the meaning of life rammed down my throat, sometimes it’s fun to laugh so much you think you’re going to piss yourself. This film is pure gold and should have scored in the 90s.

Samson And Delilah
Rotton Tomatoes score: 94%


Critics loved this film as it deals with topics most filmmakers don’t go near, such as drug use in remote aboriginal communities. While the film was definitely daring, and well-acted, that’s not enough to make it a good film. Virtually nothing happens, there’s no real story arc and it’s boring as bat****. Should have scored around 50%.

The Cat in the Hat
Rotton Tomatoes score: 10%


Ok this film has plenty of flaws, but it’s pretty entertaining. It fails as a kids’ film but it’s a hidden gem of an adult film. should be 60% at least.
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Old 10-06-2017, 06:06 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Old 10-06-2017, 07:35 AM   #3 (permalink)
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The Counselor
35% on RT
I think it's a very well made, almost fascinating movie. It's a sort of spiral into the inevitable doom of our main character. The feeling that everything has been decided before the movie is even half way over really seems to bug some people, but I think it just makes it more effective. Fassbender's character is really just in way over his head and a feeling of dread slowly towers over the movie as we know it's not going to end well. Not only do I think it's better than the 35% RT score, I think it's great.
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Old 10-07-2017, 04:25 PM   #4 (permalink)
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The Counselor
35% on RT
I think it's a very well made, almost fascinating movie. It's a sort of spiral into the inevitable doom of our main character. The feeling that everything has been decided before the movie is even half way over really seems to bug some people, but I think it just makes it more effective. Fassbender's character is really just in way over his head and a feeling of dread slowly towers over the movie as we know it's not going to end well. Not only do I think it's better than the 35% RT score, I think it's great.
Here's my review on my website that I did for that film...

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Earlier last year I wrote about how excited I was that this film was even happening. The cast, aside from Cameron Diaz, was fantastic. I am a Ridley Scott apologist. I thought “Prometheus” was a gorgeous film and although it was written by a man who should have no business in science fiction, I thought the film did space horror justice. The film boasted one of my favorite authors at the helm of the screenplay. I have enjoyed everything Cormac McCarthy has ever written and was excited for his first work written directly for the screen. WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG GUYS?

Everything. Everything went wrong.

This was one of the most pretentious pieces of hot garbage I have ever seen. It was like Ridley Scott found a pile of sh*t in the middle of the room, found out who made it, denied it was a pile of sh*t, and threw glitter on it. How is that image doing for you? I’m actually proud of that analogy. It is fitting to what this film ended up being. So we have a lawyer played by Michael f*cking Fassbender. This lawyer decides to get into the drug trade and then I honestly don’t understand what the hell happens next. Actually, if I had not read the synopsis before watching the film I would have had no idea what was happening during the entire two hour run length. This is not to say that I don’t enjoy films that make no sense. Those films however know what they’re aiming for and try to present it in a unique and experimental fashion. This film plays like McCarthy watched a Tarantino film and decided he was going to write one and use much bigger words. I love McCarthy's writing but this was just a huge failure in trying to be profound and philosophical. NOBODY TALKS THE WAY ANYBODY IN THIS MOVIE TALKS. The last line was spoken by Cameron Diaz and she used the word “famished”. She wasn’t even being ironic. It was like a high school drama student was trying to sound cool on facebook. I’m just completely surprised by how bad the entire movie was.

That isn’t to say there weren’t a few stylish elements I enjoyed. For one, Ridley Scott is just a natural behind teh camera and I enjoyed the colors portrayed in the film. There are also two very entertaining scenes that involve wire and Cameron Diaz f*cking a car.

Yes. I just said that. I’m sorry if I ruined it for you but there is no way in hell I’m not talking about this. Cameron Diaz f*cked an automobile. The term “catfish” was used in the film to describe what such an experience would be like. I vomited in my bed. Cameron Diaz owes me new sheets.

Let’s elaborate on Cameron Diaz for a moment. Why was she cast in this film? Her character is supposed to be ARGENTINIAN. Does she look Argentinian? Does she sound even remotely Argentinian? That must have been one hell of a blow job she gave to the casting director because that’s the only way that untalented woman got this job. Actually, that could probably be said for most of her career. I’m so glad that she didn’t end up doing what she always ends up doing, ruining good films. Her involvement in this was just an extra piece of lunacy added on to a debacle of a movie. Penelope Cruz was underused and had horrible lines given to her which she delivered with a subtle hint of “am I really saying this?” Javier Bardem decided to do this just so he could have his hair styled like that. I have know idea what he said in the film because of his outrageous blow out haircut. Brad Pitt played the same character he always plays, in the same voice, with the same everything.

Why did this have to happen? It was like the entire production company set us up for something brilliant and then delivered us a failure pile with a party hat on it and a note saying “Suck it population!”. I feel bad for people who paid to see this.

Let me summarize this whole thing before I write Netflix a letter asking them why they didn’t email saying “NO PLEASE DON’T” when they saw I had this movie in my queue. The film was a mechanical pretentious slob of pseudo philosophical drivel. That sentence was brought to you by the Thesaurus. The same thesaurus that Cormac McCarthy used to construct 90% of the dialogue in this film. It had a few entertaining scenes. I believe a mentioned a car being slobbered on by an old untalented vagina. It was not entertaining enough though to hold even the slightest of my attention and I would like my two hours back. Oh, an there were Cheetahs in this film that were treated like both horses and house cats. I feel violated.

0.5/5

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Old 10-07-2017, 04:38 PM   #5 (permalink)
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damn exo went in

the only movie critics were wrong about is Goodburger cause it doesn’t have a 100%
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Old 10-07-2017, 08:56 PM   #6 (permalink)
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damn exo went in
I don't know what this means.
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Old 10-07-2017, 09:50 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I don't know what this means.
it means you're getting old and don't understand the new hip young terminology
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Old 10-08-2017, 03:07 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Here's my review on my website that I did for that film...
I actually don't even disagree with much of what you're saying - I just don't take them as necessarily bad things the way you do. For example I agree that the movie is highly artificial. That weird car-****ing scene, the way the characters talk, Javier Bardem's crazy haircut, Brad Pitts talkative, pseudo-philosophical middle man... it all lends the movie a strange atmosphere that I really like. For me, it works in a really interesting way when put together with what is ultimately a very simple, very nihilistic story of a man who is a chicken playing in a lion's mouth and the not too surprising way that will inevitably end.

Guess I'm an even bigger Ridley Scott apologist!
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Old 10-08-2017, 03:29 AM   #9 (permalink)
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the only movie critics were wrong about is Goodburger cause it doesn’t have a 100%
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Old 10-08-2017, 08:41 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Roger Ebert slammed Fight Club pretty badly.

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Fincher is a good director (his work includes "Alien 3," one of the best-looking bad movies I have ever seen, and "Seven," the grisly and intelligent thriller).

With "Fight Club" he seems to be setting himself some kind of a test--how far over the top can he go? The movie is visceral and hard-edged, with levels of irony and commentary above and below the action. If it had all continued in the vein explored in the first act, it might have become a great film. But the second act is pandering and the third is trickery, and whatever Fincher thinks the message is, that's not what most audience members will get.

"Fight Club" is a thrill ride masquerading as philosophy--the kind of ride where some people puke and others can't wait to get on again.
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