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-   -   The Classics of Literature Rewritten by OccultHawk (https://www.musicbanter.com/media/91438-classics-literature-rewritten-occulthawk.html)

The Batlord 03-11-2018 03:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Akai (Post 1932421)
why?

I mean he really is a fascist megalomaniac at heart. Just a really dumb fascist.

OccultHawk 03-11-2018 04:00 PM

Uncle Tom’s Cabin (Harriet Beecher Stowe)

A strong black slave gives his cotton pickins to older weaker slaves at great peril to himself but instead of respecting him they made his name synonymous with being a sell-out. It’s probably due to illiteracy in the African-American community.

Akai 03-11-2018 04:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Batlord (Post 1932424)
I mean he really is a fascist

how?

OccultHawk 03-11-2018 04:04 PM

The Divine Comedy (Dante)

Two thousand pages and nothing funny about it. The joke’s on you, bitch.

Janszoon 03-11-2018 04:15 PM

War and Peace, by Leo Tolstoy
Napoleon was a poseur, Russian aristocrats were a bunch of Francophile idiots.

Trollheart 03-11-2018 04:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Akai (Post 1932421)
why?

He is literally Hitler.

The Batlord 03-11-2018 04:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Akai (Post 1932427)
how?

Really? You don't see how he's an authoritarian who would totally make dissenters disappear in the middle of the night if he had the power? Sometimes I forget that you're a right wing dunce.

Trollheart 03-11-2018 04:18 PM

Five Go (Whatever, they're all the same) (Enid Blyton)

Four privileged white middle-class kids and one dog go on adventures and outsmart smugglers and criminals, back in time for tea, cos this is post-war England, bitch!

Oh, terribly sorry: did I offend you, old chap? Do excuse me.

Oriphiel 03-11-2018 04:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk (Post 1932428)
The Divine Comedy (Dante)

Two thousand pages and nothing funny about it. The joke’s on you, bitch.

Nah, more like...

The Divine Comedy

It's worth going through hell and purgatory if there's some pussy waiting for you at the end.

The Batlord 03-11-2018 04:23 PM

The Da Vinci Code

**** this boring bull****.


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