Hide away (cover, quote, song, Ching)

Ma Cherie · 10-11-2005, 02:53 PM

Hide away

Hide away, Hide away
I put on the shadows
(If they see me they will know)

Run away, Run away
They are coming for me again
(Always following me,always chasing me)

Go away, Go away
They won't leave me alone
(They yell they scream, they never rest)

The dead are walking
The dark is calling
Clawing, grabing, draging us down
I won't let them,I won't join them

I see the light a shrink away
As it burns my eyes
I pull down my shades
And I disappear

Those who are holy
They reject
I always knew
They would never forget

Redemtion seems so far away
But right now I cannot stay
I cannot help but curse the light
And from the dark I run in fright

I won't give up
I won't give in
I always run from
Blood and whim

No where to run
No where to hide
Some day soon
We all will die

Put on the shadows
Shade covered eyes
The day I rest
Is the day I die

Ma Cherie · 10-12-2005, 07:53 AM

i take it the song sucks?

DontRunMeOver · 10-12-2005, 08:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ma Cherie

i take it the song sucks?

I wouldn't say it sucks. Its not that interesting on paper, as its very simple and doesn't throw many thinkable words or phrases at the reader. It might work very well in a song though as it certaintly wouldn't get in the way of the tune. It would have to be sung to a strong, catchy tune!

Ma Cherie · 10-12-2005, 09:39 AM

yeah, what in parenthesis is to be whispered and the it grows stronger as the sone goes on.

**Scarlett O'Hara** · 10-13-2005, 01:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ma Cherie

Hide away

Hide away, Hide away
I put on the shadows
(If they see me they will know)

<because shadows are really original>

Run away, Run away
They are coming for me again
(Always following me,always chasing me)

<here's that originality again!>

Go away, Go away
They won't leave me alone
(They yell they scream, they never rest)

The dead are walking
The dark is calling
Clawing, grabing, draging us down
I won't let them,I won't join them

<I thought your shadows were hiding you?>

I see the light a shrink away
As it burns my eyes
I pull down my shades
And I disappear

<You've been watching Big Daddy too much.>

Those who are holy
They reject
I always knew
They would never forget

<Are the dead people holy now?>

Redemtion seems so far away
But right now I cannot stay
I cannot help but curse the light
And from the dark I run in fright

I won't give up
I won't give in
I always run from
Blood and whim

No where to run
No where to hide
Some day soon
We all will die

<OMG DUH!>

Put on the shadows
Shade covered eyes
The day I rest
Is the day I die

I'm not trying to be horrible, but you used the simpliest English to describe what was happening, and it really had no purpose, why were you afraid? What was with the shades?

One word: symbolism

There was lack of it.

But I'm not saying it was completely crap either, it just needs some work and imagination, some personality even.

Ma Cherie · 10-13-2005, 09:20 AM

understand able i was rushing alittle and going on hardl no sleep, i felt horrible and that is what resulted form the bones of the original but if i posted all the oringinals these all sond better.

Ma Cherie · 10-13-2005, 09:21 AM

its very vampire dark themed (squeak and myself spent WAY too much time read the vampire chronicals)

10-11-2005, 02:53 PM	#1 (permalink)
Ma Cherie The Forums Sadistic Ghost Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: beyond midnight, in the abyss of time, the syren in the night Posts: 457	Hide away Hide away Hide away, Hide away I put on the shadows (If they see me they will know) Run away, Run away They are coming for me again (Always following me,always chasing me) Go away, Go away They won't leave me alone (They yell they scream, they never rest) The dead are walking The dark is calling Clawing, grabing, draging us down I won't let them,I won't join them I see the light a shrink away As it burns my eyes I pull down my shades And I disappear Those who are holy They reject I always knew They would never forget Redemtion seems so far away But right now I cannot stay I cannot help but curse the light And from the dark I run in fright I won't give up I won't give in I always run from Blood and whim No where to run No where to hide Some day soon We all will die Put on the shadows Shade covered eyes The day I rest Is the day I die __________________ I'm not a freak on a leash, I'm just the freak holding the leash. http://www.myspace.com/yukiko_mori

10-12-2005, 07:53 AM	#2 (permalink)
Ma Cherie The Forums Sadistic Ghost Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: beyond midnight, in the abyss of time, the syren in the night Posts: 457	i take it the song sucks? __________________ I'm not a freak on a leash, I'm just the freak holding the leash. http://www.myspace.com/yukiko_mori

10-12-2005, 09:39 AM	#4 (permalink)
Ma Cherie The Forums Sadistic Ghost Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: beyond midnight, in the abyss of time, the syren in the night Posts: 457	yeah, what in parenthesis is to be whispered and the it grows stronger as the sone goes on. __________________ I'm not a freak on a leash, I'm just the freak holding the leash. http://www.myspace.com/yukiko_mori

10-13-2005, 09:20 AM	#6 (permalink)
Ma Cherie The Forums Sadistic Ghost Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: beyond midnight, in the abyss of time, the syren in the night Posts: 457	understand able i was rushing alittle and going on hardl no sleep, i felt horrible and that is what resulted form the bones of the original but if i posted all the oringinals these all sond better. __________________ I'm not a freak on a leash, I'm just the freak holding the leash. http://www.myspace.com/yukiko_mori

10-13-2005, 09:21 AM	#7 (permalink)
Ma Cherie The Forums Sadistic Ghost Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: beyond midnight, in the abyss of time, the syren in the night Posts: 457	its very vampire dark themed (squeak and myself spent WAY too much time read the vampire chronicals) __________________ I'm not a freak on a leash, I'm just the freak holding the leash. http://www.myspace.com/yukiko_mori