never underestimate the power of my arsenal/
like an Abu Graibh guard youre about to get court martialed/
ive got your lady on her knees gettin' ready to please me/
she's takin' shots in the mouth like she's huntin' with D1ck Cheney/
just like a bloodhound i can smell your fear/
your rhymes are goin' downhill like an olympic class skier/
i can understand where youre comin' from/
understand why youre soundin' dumb/
i saw your bio pic i understand why you aint gettin' none/
im feelin your resistance like a 40 ohm speaker/
with every rhyme that i spit i feel you gettin' weaker/
like some tarnished silverware youve lost your shine/
you used to have respect but now its all mine/
you may have had skills but from grace you fell/
youve gone down in flames like Ashlee Simpson's SNL/
ive got more flow than a river/
when i rap i see you shiver/
my rhymes'll cut you in half and have folks hollerin' "timber!"/
take a tip from Michelle Kwan and quit before you lose/
before my string of rhymes becomes a deadly noose/
its impossible to beat me like a 30 foot drum/
im covered in metals/
youre covered in cum/
this aint the Olympics but here's your closin' ceremony/
you try to battle me youll be residin' in a cemetary/

edit: does anyone else think this thread should be moved to the new games/polls forum?

No-we're writing raps, which are classed as songs. So it shouldn't be moved. I'll write a rap up when I have time.

im just saying it would prolly get more post if it was in the other forum bc many ppl dont look at the song writing forum.

Don't put this in the lounge it belongs here/
where all the song writing talent can nearly taste your fear/
all you have to offer is your recycled rhymes/
trust me Kid I see your type all the time/
you spend an hour writing a freestyle/
you need to not take such a long while/
cos while you're writing I'm getting better/
honing my skills to chop you up like Feta/
cheese, like that between your toes/
yellow like the colour of your d1ck after time with your hoes/
cos they nasty man you need to get yourself a good girl/
I'm out here test driving your mom, then I give your sis a whirl/
slapping her ass as she screaming like a hound/
riding her like a pony, we go round and round/
go back home and cry in your pillow/
knowing that you were owned by a smelly hobo/
so next time you see a tramp lying down on the streets/
throw them a coin before they whup you with their wicked beats/

spend an hour on a rhyme?/
you know that aint my style/
my raps flow automatic/
like i got that $hit on file/
you called my raps recycled/
i think i know what you meant/
theyre soothin' to the body and they help the environment/
your rhymes musta missed the recycle bin and gone staight into the trash/
cuz that last verse you wrote stinks worse than the $hit that comes outta my a$$/
so let the battle commence/
but before you even move/
ive already beat you/
you wanna see the proof?/
just look at your reflection/
stare deep into your eyes/
you keep tellin' yourself youre good/
but even you dont believe the lies/
just give up already/
theres no use fightin'/
theres plenty of rhymes in the lyrical sea but for you the fish aint bitin'/
youre easier to figure out than a connect-the-dots puzzle/
lets hear you crack a joke with your mouth around my muzzle/
my verses are timeless like a watch with no battery/
you could try suckin' up but thats nothin' but flattery/
once again ive beaten you up and down this forum/
i think its time for you to have a change of decorum/
maybe find a website that plays to your skills/
i know it might be hard it could take a little luck/
wait a minute...........you dont have any skills/
well i guess its time for you to shut the f**k up/

Your verse are timeless, that sums them up just fine
No sense of rhythm, no sense of time
Rambling like a gramophone that keeps getting jogged
Oojay’s brain is like clockwork… hear the slow, ticking cogs
His rhymes are ageless like the ocean and just as undirected
With its gentle, ineffectual lapping, while my words are electric
My lines are like electric fence, don’t mess or you’ll be singed
My brain’s just like a van der graaf, it makes an afro of your fringe
So while your were wasting time on winding that clock
I bought me a fishing boat, went down to the dock
I trawled every inch of that “lyrical sea”
And grabbed every phrase that ever could be
So bring on the battle, I’ll offer no quarter
All you’ve got left is effluent water

fresh meat*cracks knuckles*

edit: welcome back:wave:. ill reply tomorrow when i get some time.

welcome back little buddy/
its been a while since we've battled/
i thought id scared you off/
i guess i had you a little rattled/
your rhymes are slackin' off/
youre gettin' a little rusty/
youve been away from the game too long/
your repetoire's a little dusty/
your lyrical development is arrested/
because your writes have remained silent/
you wanna call a nigga out?!/
youre 'bout to make a nigga turn violent/
you speak of my lyrical sea as if you know how to fish/
but your nets came up empty/
rap's definitely not your niche/
if the way you write your rhymes/
is any indication of your life/
youve got a half-ass car and a half-ass house/
some half-ass kids and a half-ass wife/
youre runnin' with the big dogs/
youd better get used to the pressure/
stealin' my "electric fence" line/
thats no honorable gesture/
try workin' on some new rhymes/
maybe take another vacation/
'cuz this battle that youve started/
has ended with your summation/

Rhyming line with rhymes, silent with violent?
You’ll get constipation with that much cheese in your diet
Your lines are now so out of date, they’ve started taking pensions
But, yeah I like to pillage, if I’m feeling like a Viking
I battle how I like, screw the Geneva convention
So if I want I’ll take your lyrics, when I find some to my liking
Do I have to lock you in a fridge to teach you how to chill?
I’ll steal your lines and make them mine, just like I stole your girl
Cos I take what I want, when I'm feeling so inclined
I wanted to take more, but they were the only good ones I could find
If you're quitting, you can follow the arrows, they're all pointing to the door
Cos I’m ready to take this battle to a full blown war
I’m calling you out like an umpire in a game of cricket
‘Cos too many guys have hit their balls against your middle wicket

I think it's time we take it to the next level,sit back relax no bass no treble
no need to repeat again, pass the mic to a veteran
a pimp who knows the time,gets ladies like Federline
a style that's spastic,spoutin vocal gymnastics
as you can see my skills are heaven sent,straight from the monkey bars to the main event
first rhyme in the thread,got y'all bobbin your head



more next time gotta go

Back to the battle, has it been two weeks?
Murder's rap put me into a 17 day sleep
The way he drooled and slurred like an 80 year old drunk
Junkie's the right name for him, his ryhmes are all junk
He admits to being spastic!? Well it must be cerebral palsy
That leaves his vocab and style so slack that it appalls me

yo im game, some1 go first and imma hit you back.

all u fools be bustin yo rhymes
like three year old kiddies
chillin out at lunch time
your style is offensive
your vocablulary's crap
u might as well quit
imma show u how to rap

You're gonna impose your raps on me?
I'll leave you with an Ice Pick in your head like Leon Trotsky
Leave you mangled like a helpless Jew before a blood thirsty, sadistic Nazi
This guy says my style is offensive?
I'll leave him with sciccors in both eyes and two bloody slit wrists
This cat can't touch this,
cause in the midst of battle, it's RHYMEFEST who busts lips
calls himself unearthfreak and needed a dictionary to spell it right
my rhymes are hella tight
I'll tell your girl you said hello when she's riding on my d*ck tonight

I want to call out Fenixpunk
The guy who thinks he is gods gift to rapping
You're a white punk from Arizona and no one in the crowd is clapping
Thinking he is going to dominate battles with encycolpedia book smarts
It's not hard to seem smart when you've got wikipedia bookmarked, this battle's sparked
I guess it's easy to get cocky when your only competition are limey brits who were burned worse than Nagasaki
I'll crush your backbone into fine powder
Send that sh*t to Donald Rumsfeld then knock down the Twin Towers
This cocky bitch who thinks he's holding powers
Your flow is weak but my skill devours

Wow, i've seen alot of things beneath the citys lights,
Including pussies trying to enter a fight,
Cmon the typical jew nazi rhyme?
How about i let you sit in front tonight,
So get your small brain down in the seat lineing,
The curtain drops in 10 minutes, and I don't
Wait for internet gangstas,
Theres nine entrances, and 8 even you can see
So take seven paces this way, and find your seat
With the gold engaving reading "a pathetic preteen"
Six more notes and youll learn you're nothing here
You just don't understand, five times and all you
Hear is static, unplug your ears and let the idioticy
Scream out like the bitch that finally saw your face
When the smoke faded away,
"oh my god, i cant believe his zits are larger then his fucking dick!"

Hey, some kid finally replied, too bad I can't understand his timing.
Maybe you didn't know, but this is the rap battles thread, that implys rhyming.
I don't think it's necessary to tell you this, but I'm like a dictionary, my rhymes are rife
I'll f*ck your wife with a bowie knife and tell you that you suck at life.
Is this all that musicbanter can offer me?
An "unearth freak" and a Sage Francis wannabe.
You pit me against an elementary lyricist and a wanna-be-Bright Eyes emcee?
My rhymes are like Shakespearian Tragedies
Beautiful and cathartic
Crowquill, your lines are cold as hell, made and manufactured in the arctic?
I can't really tell if you can rhyme well, all I know is that you're broke as hell, and in this battle fell.

I'm sorry, I forgot this was preschool
I didn't know there was no such thing as flow,
I mean if I can keep it going it doesn't matter,
As long as use generic lines and look like the rapping version of mothergoose,
Everything will be cool? oh wait if its cool
I may as well be cliche and talk about the arctic with it,
See, what you think is advancing forward and having skill
I kind of think its walking backwards,
Soon or later you'll hit a pole, and fall,
But hey, at least fifty cent where be there
To pick you up, and if you're lucky he'll love cock too.

You build yourself up to be torn down, I'll leave you crumbled and junked
Oh, wait, good one musicbanter, you got me battling that kid from punk'd
Maybe I was walking backwards, hit a pole and fell
But that's all irrelavent because your flowing sucks and your raps are wack as hell.
This has got to be a f*cking joke, comparing me to mothergoose?
I'll rip out your spinal cord so you can use it as your f*cking noose.
I think the part that processes rhymes in Crowquill's brain is disfuctional, it's broke
I'm still waiting for Ashton Kutcher to come out and tell me this was all a joke.

Hey you ever read a book called catcher in the rye?
I realize you may not be able to read anything longer
Then your sex life, aka a playboy but there this little quote
"All morons hate to be called a moron"
I'll let that speak for its self, how about stepping
Away from the keyboard, and picking up a book
And learning something so you don't have to focus
On the pettyness of something miniscule as a rhyme,
And maybe in the ink you can find a decent reason to attack me,
Because frankly i've heard nothing but lame comparissions,
And a pathetic attempt at coming across as a man with some intelligence.

Crow go back to flattening your fringe
Your rhymes smell more pungent than your Mommys wet minge
I've got in on my fingers, all over my hands
She was tasting my icing cos I'm the candy man
Stop this rapping before you cause us an injury
I want to stab out my eyes with all these **** rhymes I see
Go back to the board, pick up the chalk
and remember this rhyme the next time you talk
I'm gonna give you some pointers, give you some tips,
so remember these the next time you try and spit
1. there is a thing called flow, don't know whether you know
this ain't song writing, we don't want depth
we don't want no emos with a noose round their neck
2. Catcher in the rye? Now you're just being smart
You gotta shoot for the balls, not shoot for the heart
while you're standing there like a plank flexing your brain
I'll be off with my rhymes seeing who else I can maim
3. Comparisons and intelligence? Now where's the rhyme here?
I think you've forgot what thread you're typing in, my dear.
In rap it's about the rhymes, not the length.
It's not about the big words, it's all about the strength.
And unfortunately, that's something you don't have.
So go back home kiddie, I'll pay for your cab.

ive used my time off to hone my skills/ to count my kills/ makin paper to pay my bills/ aint nobody here gonna spit it like the champ/ i can see right through ya like a paper towel thats damp/ yall better get a calender and check the date/ oojays back on the scene and you still wanna hate?/ youre just upset cuz ive been rippin the microphone from the gate/ now youd best invest in the best form of protection for yo chest/ it aint no bulletproof vest/ its keepin your mouth shut like the rest/ if ive said it once ill say it again/ im shootin holes in your rhymes like the lyrical assassin/ if you wanna be disrespectin me ill be the last thing you ever see/ cuz when i pull out my glock youve got no choice but to swallow it like a c0ck/ yall must have a deathwish goin up against this pimp/ but your pride comes before your fall/ ill cut you off at the knees like a f*ckin gimp!

You've honed your skills?
You call that sh*t an improvement?
I hate to say it oojay, but with that kind of wordplay
I can tell you're gonna loose it quick
My rhymes are like Technique delux
You spent hours thinking of that f*cking rhyme yet--still it f*cking sucks
I've been known to wreck sluts, and fake internet gangsters
Sadly you don't even compare to them, you're just a third rate-rapping-prankster
I've seen you talking like your rhymes are biggie
The only thing biggie 'bout you is your jiggly man titties and your flow is sh*tty
Go back to your primitave rhyming village cause rap is my city

Calling out someone whos known to decapitate
Probably aint your first, but yo, it’s the last mistake
Like so many before you, I reply with a grin
You wanna battle this punk? **** homie, lets begin
And when your beggin for it to end cuz you cant take anymore
Crouched in a fetal position, tears covering the floor
Only then will you realize, youre out of your league
I can sit and spit all day with no signs of fatigue
Ill leave you broke, like your daddy, sucking **** for some crack
Ill take your mom out to dinner, bang her, and never call back
Im untouchable, like OJ, I can get away with murder
Hang on, your gfs here, I promise I wont hurt her
But don’t get on her case when she starts walking with a limp
Cuz she took all 9 inches like a champ, and been lovin it since.

:pimp:

This is the guy who you've all let dominate?/
I think you're a little bit backwards hommie-this battle's yours, not my mistake/
This cat rhymes like Kevin Federline with premeditated lines he thought of three weeks ahead of time/
From the Genesis your rhymes were outta wack/
This guy jacks off so much that he has to suck dick to get the sperm back/
I think it's safe to say that no one wants to hear you rhyme no more/
this guy's a whore and I'll filet his spinal cord with a rusty sword/
Walking around this thread like he's got the 'Best Rapper' title/
I'll steal your plastic trophy and re-engrave it to say 'RHYMEFEST'S MY IDOL'/
Your style's idle and the statement that I've just claimed this thread is rightful.

i think after each little bit we need to say who won, just between the two previous raps.
is it okay to tie or anything? I dunno

i dominate for a reason,
no ones been close, not you, its fenix season,
you think i came up with that 3 weeks ahead?
untill you woke the giant, this threads been dead,
since ive left, this thread hasnt been read,
now that im out, its straight to your head
like a .45 to your dome the blood has been shed,
youre flow is tame, its lame, give it up
before this white boy from fenix shows you up
and all your "down" friends will attack you
cuz they wont hang with whos rhymes slack
you think they are with you, but once youre beat, they dont got your back
you can call me a punk, but i warn you im a hoodlum
ill piss on your grave, im the king, its been proven
so my advice to you kid is you need stay in school,
this white boy owns you, youre nothing but my tool,
and with you i will once again show MB how i reign,
you downgrade the "brits" but to me youre all the same
no flows, no style, you dont come close, you give your best
This if FenixPunk mother fucker, i just layed your weak ass to rest.

i will admit, this line is one of the best ive been up against:

You're the self proclaimed king but your rhymin's wack/
I just laughed so hard I gave my entire lineage heart attacks/
Your lines come across as weak--consistantly/
don't bother too much cuz that's the way that sh*ts supposed to be/
you don't come close to me/
I've noticed one thing from this Fenixpunk, in every line/
His sh*t ain't rapping dude it's basic nursery rhyme/
Throw in a multi or a funny punchline, perhaps then I'll call you a challenge till then you're just wasting my time/
your audience has flat laughlines from that wack sh*t he just spit in his last lines/
My rhyme is dope as f*ck- blasting punks like land mines/
Laid my ass to rest? that's funny sh*t/
i'm coming at you with some rusty siccors and I'll leave your chest split/
I'll say it again you can't rhyme complex and your style's weak/
you rap like a 14 year old geek tripping on 8 grams of tweak/
Fenix you don't make the grade, your rhymes don't cut it/
Every line I spit merely re-instates that I am dope as sh*t.

:beer:

ive got that little red button at the edge of my fingertips/ you can call me harry truman cuz i dont start it but ill finish $hit/ yall niggaz gettin frostbite from the cold war that im wagin/ who youre facin/ im someone youll never forget until your days end/its an all out assault/ youll get jolted until youve folded/ dont be reppin the techniques from the classes that im enrolled in/ its the school of hard knocks with a prerequisite of pain/dont hurt your brain/ tryin to come up with some rhymes that arent so lame/ i know that you aint too bright/ it seems youre lackin in the cabeza/ dont let me phase ya/ the special ed classes these days would amaze ya/ youre soundin just like yoda "i try to rap but smart im not"/ you claim to have some skills but all your last verses flopped/ your rhymes are all talk and no action/ and it seems to cause a chain reaction/ cuz all the motherf**kers that are up here frontin/ take the dicks out your mouth before you try to spit somethin/

thats who i be
 

hey guys...new to this..you said you wanted a good laugh..so hear it is..me introducing myself.....dont make fun of me because my forwars slash doesnt work...lol


got kicked outa school
but i wasnt a fool
got adopted at eleven
favorite number is seven
im 100 pounds and 5 foot 2
freestylin rhymes is what i do
im native and irish
dont drink like a fish
i may smoke weed
but i dont touch speed
i dont read books
but i got the looks
im sexy as hell
and my rhymes will sell
im misfit_shorty
thats who i be
well i hate fakers
and i cant stand fakers
i drink ice tea
ya i know you love me
misfit_shorty comin your way
listen up, i got lots to say
straight outa picton
ya i live for fun
i look thirteen
and im causin a scene
i aint ill,im just sick
now make it public
misfit_shorty
thats who i be
im small and im white
never flown a kite
just a small town girl
here to rock your world
just give me a chance
i can make you dance
cause im misfit_shorty
and thats who i be

And I thought I was bad...

thats not nice
 

give me a ****in break
at least my rhymes aint fake
all i am is being me
so shut your mouth and listen to me

Least I don't rhyme me with me,
Suck my pee pee,
Oh gee gee,
i can rhyme like im two,
Just like you,
You're really eww,

so the other day i was walking down the street
this wigga was lookin like he wanted to speak
but i looked away and walked on by
that f****er looked like he wanted to cry
if you dont like what i got to say
just turn around and walk away
i dont care what you think about me
to me youre just the size of a flea

im waitin for you to answer back
but i guess you wont coz your rhymes is wack
im new in the game
but its all the same
gimme somthin to read
common man,pick up the speed

lolz you can't spell n00b,
you're only saying that sh*t 'cause you haven't ever seen a boob,
so take a seat and listen well,
then we'll all get along oh so swell,

i guarantee i've seen more boobs than you
cause i've got a girlfriend and i own two
there sittin on my chest
and they're the best
and you'll never see them
'cause you're a him!!



(at least i think your a him...let me know if im wrong)..lol