Music Banter

Go Back   Music Banter > Artists Corner > Song Writing, Lyrics and Poetry
Register Blogging Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read
Welcome to Music Banter Forum! Make sure to register - it's free and very quick! You have to register before you can post and participate in our discussions with over 70,000 other registered members. After you create your free account, you will be able to customize many options, you will have the full access to over 1,100,000 posts.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-25-2008, 06:50 AM   #1 (permalink)
Groupie
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Göteborg
Posts: 11
Default "Gingerbread puppets"

Here is my first song ever, I'd like some feedback. I haven't put any effort or thought about the numbers of syllabulls each phrase has, do you think I shoul? I'm quite new to this.

Hope you like it!

Gingerbread puppets
You’re always right, and I’m always wrong… Keeping your ideals inside the box makes you perfect copy. It is all we ever wanted the man made sure of that. A schematic so genius, 1 part your heart, 3 parts his blood! You were sold to a guy offering you an office cubicle

Cuz you are my gingerbread girl
What the man says is what you’re more than willing to offer
Cuz you are my Gingerbread girl
So wonderful yet so, non-devious

They tied your head up, stripped you from your self-security. What the man wants is what he gets
A Girl so pretty in grey, covered in the oozes of her drewling gingerbread colleagues. They all look just the same, and never have second thoughts, How could life be easier?

We don’t have to think for ourselves, that’s what we have the baker for He breeds his gingerbread army to capture the home of hearts deep in the woods of the forgotten we’re the true values are.

Non-conformity, originality all of which that are the bakers secrets. Not to be told to anyone, for it would put the bakery out of business.

My gingerbread girl died for Democracy
I didn’t really care for her in the end, there are a 100 billion more like her
My gingerbread girl died for Nothing
She was a living dead after all…
My gingerbread girl died for the baker's Hypocrasy!

The end
__________________
Saves the day - Hold
"Remember, the only thing we need sometimes
are chilly nights and warmer thighs
cus nothing's like being held, sometimes"
Kognitiva is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Similar Threads



© 2003-2019 Advameg, Inc.

SEO by vBSEO 3.5.2 ©2010, Crawlability, Inc.