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Old 08-16-2008, 03:41 PM   #1 (permalink)
Ban Captain Caveman
 
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: In The Realms of Poetry
Posts: 560
Default Its Not A Crime If She's A Prole

Its Not A Crime If She’s A Prole


Inspired by Suzanne Vega's "Blood Makes Noise."

Did you know blood makes noise
I can't stand the din because
I can't understand the reason
For the noise of blood squirting
From my skin as the knife plunged
Into my shoulder and by body folded
In pain to try to remain protected.
But the violence takes its toll
I'm adversely affected permanently
For no reason that I can see this
Season, maybe I'll come back
In the fall, when I can understand
The need for violent attacks
On star-scarce nights when clouds
Cover the sky like a premonitory
Sign.

I appreciate the effort, but
Leave me alone in my pay-by-the-hour
Roach motel. The damage is done, doc.
The crime is done, the police are gone
The blood is drawn, and my emotions
Died in an ugly roach motel.

I still have to go out tomorrow
And do it all again,
No matter what you say.
I can only hope this time
He uses a condom and
Won't put a knife to my throat.

The crime is done,
The police are nowhere to be found
My blood has been stolen by a knife
Now I need to figure out
How to tell my little prince
About the cuts on mommy's body.

Doc, I appreciate the effort,
But I'm wounded and it won't go away.
Leave me in peace, because
I've already got my disease.
So take your ****in' filthy hands off of me.
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What's with people dying? Shit.
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Old 08-17-2008, 07:16 AM   #2 (permalink)
Meanie McFeany
 
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Troy side'ah the dirt, NY
Posts: 455
Default

YEAH DOO. I dig it. This bit,

Quote:
I appreciate the effort, but
Leave me alone in my pay-by-the-hour
Roach motel. The damage is done, doc.
The crime is done, the police are gone
The blood is drawn, and my emotions
Died in an ugly roach motel.
and this,

Quote:
Doc, I appreciate the effort,
But I'm wounded and it won't go away.
Leave me in peace, because
I've already got my disease.
So take your ****in' filthy hands off of me.
Those are my favorites. But on the whole I think it's very good. Raw, edgy. I like the subject matter. You've got a way with words. Two thumbs up. I can see where your love of Ginsberg comes in.
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