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Old 02-06-2009, 02:09 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Cry Wolf (Lyrics)

Cry Wolf

How many times must you become contingent?
Requisition to conceal all of your failures
You've got to succeed on your own this time

Once again you fall under
Cry wolf
Never await the unexpected
Cry Wolf

Don't lead me into your abyss
Somehow I can never escape your luring
Black hole tramas have grabbed hold of the strings
And now I must sever the ties
Burn the ends

Once again you fall under
Cry wolf
Never await the unexpected
Cry Wolf

Pull me under
Only to tread for another moment

Solo

Once again you fall under
Cry wolf
Never await the unexpected
Cry wolf
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Old 02-06-2009, 10:49 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Nice work, but you need to extend it a little more. Another verse should do the trick.
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Old 02-07-2009, 02:14 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Good work.
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Old 02-18-2009, 08:27 PM   #4 (permalink)
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ok so here is the 3rd verse:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Frozen Angel View Post
Cry Wolf

How many times must you become contingent?
Requisition to conceal all of your failures
You've got to succeed on your own this time

Once again you fall under
Cry wolf
Never await the unexpected
Cry Wolf

Don't lead me into your abyss
Somehow I can never escape your luring
Black hole tramas have grabbed hold of the strings
And now I must sever the ties
Burn the ends

Once again you fall under
Cry wolf
Never await the unexpected
Cry Wolf

Pull me under
Only to tread for another moment

Solo

I'd never want to push you away
But there is no other way to avoid the vampire
Lurking within you, it shows through all too well
I saw your intentions each and every time
They're not mine


Once again you fall under
Cry wolf
Never await the unexpected
Cry wolf
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Old 02-21-2009, 08:35 AM   #5 (permalink)
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i dont know if the last verse fits with the rest. the original verses seem to fit well together nicely; theyre both about not wanting to be pulled down under with someone. but the newest one seems like your commenting on their ethics and not on their actions
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Old 02-21-2009, 10:56 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trendkiller View Post
Nice work, but you need to extend it a little more. Another verse should do the trick.
I disagree. I think it should be as long as you want it to be, blend the music and the lyrics, use them to explain each other. If it need to be as long as it was in order to give the point across, leave it.
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Old 02-24-2009, 10:49 AM   #7 (permalink)
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i did want the song longer. But if it does get steared in a different direction, that's not really what I wanted. I just tried to put this verse into the song, and it was a little awkard. I dunno, I might try to re-word this. After the two verses are separated by the solo, it is kinda hard to just jump back into the same frame of mine, and repeat the same things that i already said.

But this song is about a careless person who is always in need of somekind of help, be it financial or emotional. It happens way too often. When it is someone that a person is close to it is hard to say no, or not want to help. It seems that it is easier to ask someone else to hand you a ladder than to pull your self out of a hole you dug yourself. Or even going ahead and helping them and saying "Ok but this is the last time" even though it never is.

I dunno, I dont know how to ends this.
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Old 02-24-2009, 04:35 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I wouldn't worry about the length, since depending on how you write the vocal piece, the lyrics can be extended to fit nicely, regardless of the actual length of the track in text form.

I think it's an interesting piece, and I'm not sure if there's a rhythm you have in mind, so I won't judge the flow of it, since I've written parts that flow only in certain phrasings before.

And yeah, that added verse seems out of place (and in my opinion, twilight has made vampire metaphors extremely cliché and annoying).

EDIT: Regarding the ending: If you're stumped for an ending, don't force it. Try using an altered version of the chorus,
"Something different than the chorus but with similar flow and more resolution
cry wolf
same note as above
cry wolf"
I think that would work. *shrug* just throwing suggestions around though.
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