Pulsar

Hey guys,

So lately me and a friend have been working on our biggest project yet, named Nightmare. It's a track split into 3 different songs, each portraying a different stage in a story.

The song follows the story of a man who is having a night terror, which is, in a nutshell, a nightmare that feels very real and vivid. The first part is fully instrumental and is supposed to envoke the feeling of eeriness by implementing a lot of synths and creepy sounds.

The second part focuses on the person waking up. Following the dream, the person is very confused and realizes he can't tell the difference between a dream and reality. He realizes he is losing his mind, but doesn't know what to do about it. This part tries to convey that feeling by implementing unique vocal effects, vocal harmonies and generally hardcore riffs.

The third and final part focuses on the person reaching a decision regarding his condition. He decides that he can't go on living like this, and that the only solution that makes any sense is to commit suicide. Even so, he is not scared, but instead very content and fully confident about his decision, to the point where he actually feels complete for the first time. The music here is more symphonic, with a few violins, chellos, piano and very soft vocals.

If you're expecting something similar to metal, screamo, or anything of the sort, this is NOT it. This is more similar to electronic/alternative rock.

If you are using iTunes, the songs include the lyrics (under "Get Info --> Lyrics"). If anyone needs lyrics, tell me and I'll upload them for you as well.

Part 1: Night Terror
[Link removed by mod, no advertising]
Part 2: New Paradigm
[Link removed by mod, no advertising]

Part 3: Serenity
[Link removed by mod, no advertising]

Any feedback, good or bad, is appreciated. Hope you guys enjoy listening to it as much as we have enjoyed making it!

VeggieLover

I'm enjoying this actually, though the night terror bit didn't have enough contrasts in High energy and low energy to get the nightmare across. I definitely wouldn't have gotten that he was in a nightmare if i hadn't read the blip first. If it were me, I'd start off like you did, then build into a "chase scene" or a swirling mood, maybe with a heavy bass drum beat. Though music is all about individual expression, when telling a story through music (especially lyric-less music) it's useful to rely on common human experience and build off of that to get your point across.

The second bit i like, though here too the energy doesn't seem high enough to convey the panic you describe in your post. the lyrics and harmonies fit well and it's overall enjoyable to listen too. But that's just it, its a little bit too enjoyable for me. With a story this specific and creepy, you want to manipulate emotions, pull on the heart strings, maybe pull on your listeners a little bit so they feel what your "man" is feeling. Pull them towards his inevitable conclusion.

You did a better job in the last section, using the low strings to build tension in a way that can and will be resolved in the end. However, i don't think this tension was built up *quiet* enough before the erie lyrics started (wonderful vocals btw, i don't know much about the recording editing process, but i know a good voice when i hear it) The piece ended well, i like that the voices stopped at the end, it brought the piece full circle. However, its unclear whether he actually *did* commit suicide. Perhaps the ambiguity is intentional, perhaps not.

I'm interested on why you decided to split the piece into three distinct tracks. Transitions can and should be what distinguishes the men from the boys (so to speak). Smooth transitions, or purposefully rough ones , can yank around a person's emotions more that anything else. I speak this way from the perspective of a developing writer, but it goes for any art.

Overall, it needed more raw emotion for my taste. But, if I hadn't known what it was about, I wouldn't have had much critisism at all. Work on keeping the vision broad enough to appeal to an audience without sacrificing the integrity of your art and on really experiencing human emotion so you can transfer that to music. I'd love to hear more, keep it up.

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Pulsar

thank you for this constructive criticism, it's great to hear an honest and analytic opinion rather than the usual 1 or 2 sentences we get

And I know exactly what you mean, since the point was kind of to portray all these emotions through the music itself rather than explaining it with words.. We thought that the wind effect, eerie high-pitched ghost sounds, whispers and noisy synths in part 1 were enough.. But I guess everyone sees it differently hah.. But your opinion makes perfect sense to me

And the reason we split the track into 3 different parts was to give the listeners the option to pick the part they want to listen to without having to skim through one long track.. And because we thought that a story that has 3 different stages to it should have 3 different parts, each specifically made to fit the mood

LoathsomePete

Rules, they're not just there for show

So yeah, usually we'd just ban you on the spot for getting 15 posts in order to post links for your own benefit but I'm going to offer you a "get out of banning" free card.

We do not allow people to just join here in order to advertise their music without becoming an established member on this forum.

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VeggieLover

yay for merciful mods! i like em

__________________
"Not remotely! Because iocaine comes from Australia, as everyone knows. And Australia is entirely peopled with criminals. And criminals are used to having people not trust them as you are not trusted by me, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you."