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Originally Posted by VEGANGELICA
Dotoar,
I enjoyed listening to all three of your most recently posted songs, 'Veritas' (Truth), 'Skyline,' and 'I hate (etc.).'
All have that swimming, stream-of-consciousness feel plus the changes in time signatures that I associate with progressive rock. You also produced them very well. You create a terrific balance between vocals and instrumentals, and both sound professional, perfectly in pitch and in time, for example.
'Skyline' was my favorite, perhaps because it seems the most energetic to me with frequent jolts as the time signatures change.
I would prefer a different title than "I hate that I love you etc" for your final song, which sounds very different than hate and a feeling of foolishness for loving someone who does not reciprocate those feelings. I especially liked the chorus you created in this song through over-dubbing your voice, which gave the song a Beach Boys feel. Very lush. Foolish woman for not being won over!  Ah well. Such is love--you can't force it through your own.
Dotoar, I didn't pay much heed to the lyrics in these three songs, since the music seems more important than the lyrics that sometimes feel as if they lack a literal meaning and have instead more of an emotional one.
However, I did notice in the last two songs you tend to refer to the sun and sunshine a LOT, and even mention light in "Veritas." I feel that describing the sun and the experience of light seems very 'progressive rock-ish' and perhaps cliche. Your lyrics do fit the mood of the music very well, though.
Thinking about how you use the sun in your lyrics made me think of writing a song that has no use of visual descriptions of anything...a song that just uses the other senses rather than sight. I'm wondering now what sorts of songs a blind person tends to write, since the striking image of the sun would not exist for her if she had never seen it. Yet presumably the other senses would provide a similar feeling of awe and relaxation that we get from seeing the sun. The sense of sight is so overpowering that it is hard to ignore if one has it, yet I feel some interesting songs or ways of describing how we feel might result if we relied less heavily on visual references. |
I haven't really thought that much of my visual imagery actually. I guess it comes quite naturally since I like to speak in metaphors. The sun/light topic on the other hand, is perpetual throughout my songwriting, as the sun itself is the ultimate source of life and ever-present as a celestial body, so it's quite handy when it comes to describing something all-encompassingly positive. Lines like "
When guards and frontiers dissolve in the light" are obviously making use of the light/dark-right/wrong-dichotomy. Clichéd perhaps, but hey, it's prog rock. It's supposed to be clichéd! Hope will only die with the last idealist.
When I think about it, I believe I've got a sort of circular method of songwriting, in that I think of a certain topic which I proceed to describe in the lyrics. Kind of sculpturing the body around a core which could be acknowledged from the description. I'm not much of a storyteller when it comes to song lyrics though, I'm probably too much of an analyst for that.
Anyways, thanks for the feedback! And yes, "I hate that I blablabla" is not one of my most profound titles. It's just that I was in such a melancholy mood at the time, as well as thinking that it would be fun to make a really long tounge twister for a title. It wasn't fun. At all.
Quote:
Originally Posted by VEGANGELICA
Tiny spelling comment: "Breath" is the noun; "breathe" is to inhale and exhale:
"come true in that the day will breath of everlasting love."
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Spelling comment acknowledged.
Quote:
Originally Posted by music0_uno1
Dude! Turn of the lake is bloody epic! Great song + lyrics
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Thanks!
04-22-2011, 11:32 AM
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