Developing My Writing..

Daniisarus · 02-17-2013, 03:57 AM

Hey, everyone.
Last time I came here, I was 14, and just wrote a song about a girl who sent me threats.
Well. In that space of a year I've been writing new stuff, and wanted more opinions on it

[This is only half a song, but it's more constructed than the other ones I've written xD

Sometimes I ponder.
Sometimes I wonder.
What could've been us.
What happened to the trust?

For too long I've worn my heart on my sleeve.
I'm not telling you how to live, but I'm telling you to leave.
Now, you ****ing bitch.

I'm guessing that'd be a first verse and a chorus, still working on stuff haha.
x)

misspoptart · 02-17-2013, 10:54 AM

I hope this is a screamo song.

Daniisarus · 02-22-2013, 02:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by misspoptart

I hope this is a screamo song.

It is ._.

misspoptart · 02-22-2013, 04:48 AM

YES! 10 points for me. And I think those lyrics will be just fiiiiine.

02-17-2013, 03:57 AM	#1 (permalink)
Daniisarus Groupie Join Date: Jun 2012 Location: Melbourne, Australia Posts: 9	Developing My Writing.. Hey, everyone. Last time I came here, I was 14, and just wrote a song about a girl who sent me threats. Well. In that space of a year I've been writing new stuff, and wanted more opinions on it [This is only half a song, but it's more constructed than the other ones I've written xD Sometimes I ponder. Sometimes I wonder. What could've been us. What happened to the trust? For too long I've worn my heart on my sleeve. I'm not telling you how to live, but I'm telling you to leave. Now, you ****ing bitch. I'm guessing that'd be a first verse and a chorus, still working on stuff haha. x) __________________ "Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve" - Napoleon Hill

02-17-2013, 10:54 AM	#2 (permalink)
misspoptart gimme gimme Join Date: Dec 2012 Location: istanbul Posts: 897	I hope this is a screamo song.

02-22-2013, 04:48 AM	#4 (permalink)
misspoptart gimme gimme Join Date: Dec 2012 Location: istanbul Posts: 897	YES! 10 points for me. And I think those lyrics will be just fiiiiine.