offensive jokes *giggles* (house, The Police, Micheal Jackson, song)

MURDER JUNKIE · 02-10-2006, 11:54 AM

What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds?

there is twenty of them

Muzak Geek · 02-10-2006, 12:52 PM

A Catholic priest is walking through a dark forest with a little boy. The little boy becomes frightened, and tells the priest, "Sir, I'm scared of this place". The priest then replies, "How do you think I feel, kid - I gotta walk back outta here alone."

What's the worst part about having sex with a 10-year old?…
Washing the stains out of your clown suit.

A woman named Betty wants to show her devotion and love to her new boyfriend Billy. She decides to get the first letter of each of their names tatooed on her ass - One letter on one cheek, and one letter on the other cheek. That night, she tells her husband what she did - He asks to see it, so she pulls down her panties, and bends over to show him the results. After a long pause, she asks, "What do you think?" The man replies, "Who the f*ck is BoB?"

PerFeCTioNThrUSileNCe · 02-10-2006, 12:59 PM

ive heard that last one. funny stuff.

**LesPaul43** · 02-10-2006, 02:53 PM

Hahaha

Fenixpunk · 02-10-2006, 04:20 PM

One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts. He'd toss
them
in the air, then catch them in his mouth. In the middle of catching one,
his
wife asked him a question, and as he turned to answer her, a peanut fell in
his ear.
He tried and tried to dig it out but succeeded in only pushing it in
deeper.
He called his wife for assistance, and after hours of trying they
became worried and decided to go to the hospital.
As they were ready to go out the door, their daughter came home with her
date. After being informed of the problem, their daughter's date said he
could get the peanut out.
The young man told the father to sit down, then proceeded to shove two
fingers up the father's nose and told him to blow hard. When the father
blew, the peanut flew out of his ear.
The mother and daughter jumped and yelled for joy. The young man insisted
that it was nothing and the daughter took the young man out to the kitchen
for something to eat.
Once he was gone, the mother turned to the father and said,
"That's so wonderful! Isn't he smart? What do you think he's going to be
when he grows older?"
The father replied "From the smell of his fingers, our son in-law."

judas_priest · 02-10-2006, 06:14 PM

Lol- that's sick

anticipation · 02-10-2006, 06:14 PM

roflshtiadfloa!

"rolling on floor laughing so hard that i am dying from lack of air"

**LesPaul43** · 02-10-2006, 07:37 PM

Lmaonade!

Mama Booze · 02-10-2006, 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fenixpunk

One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts. He'd toss
them
in the air, then catch them in his mouth. In the middle of catching one,
his
wife asked him a question, and as he turned to answer her, a peanut fell in
his ear.
He tried and tried to dig it out but succeeded in only pushing it in
deeper.
He called his wife for assistance, and after hours of trying they
became worried and decided to go to the hospital.
As they were ready to go out the door, their daughter came home with her
date. After being informed of the problem, their daughter's date said he
could get the peanut out.
The young man told the father to sit down, then proceeded to shove two
fingers up the father's nose and told him to blow hard. When the father
blew, the peanut flew out of his ear.
The mother and daughter jumped and yelled for joy. The young man insisted
that it was nothing and the daughter took the young man out to the kitchen
for something to eat.
Once he was gone, the mother turned to the father and said,
"That's so wonderful! Isn't he smart? What do you think he's going to be
when he grows older?"
The father replied "From the smell of his fingers, our son in-law."

that made me LMAO.

jazzfromhell · 02-10-2006, 10:58 PM

A priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk into a bar, and that's just the first guy.

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02-10-2006, 11:54 AM
MURDER JUNKIE Tiggers Like To BOUNCE!! Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: SH1TTY London Ontario Canada Posts: 2,416	What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? there is twenty of them __________________ I've been had at least that's how it looks and it's not funny like on TV and it's not smart like it is in books

02-10-2006, 12:52 PM
Muzak Geek Music Addict Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Wake Forest, NC Posts: 91	A Catholic priest is walking through a dark forest with a little boy. The little boy becomes frightened, and tells the priest, "Sir, I'm scared of this place". The priest then replies, "How do you think I feel, kid - I gotta walk back outta here alone." What's the worst part about having sex with a 10-year old?… Washing the stains out of your clown suit. A woman named Betty wants to show her devotion and love to her new boyfriend Billy. She decides to get the first letter of each of their names tatooed on her ass - One letter on one cheek, and one letter on the other cheek. That night, she tells her husband what she did - He asks to see it, so she pulls down her panties, and bends over to show him the results. After a long pause, she asks, "What do you think?" The man replies, "Who the f*ck is BoB?" __________________ Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, Start… Just because we use cheats, doesn't mean we're not smart.

02-10-2006, 02:53 PM
LesPaul43 Bring da Ruckus Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: British Columbia Posts: 4,056	Hahaha __________________ Life's not a bitch life is a beautiful woman You only call her a bitch because she won't let you get that pussy Maybe she didn't feel y'all shared any similar interests When Life Gives You Lemons, You Paint That Shit Gold

02-10-2006, 04:20 PM
Fenixpunk The Erroneous Hoodlum Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: West Side Phoenix Posts: 2,128	One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts. He'd toss them in the air, then catch them in his mouth. In the middle of catching one, his wife asked him a question, and as he turned to answer her, a peanut fell in his ear. He tried and tried to dig it out but succeeded in only pushing it in deeper. He called his wife for assistance, and after hours of trying they became worried and decided to go to the hospital. As they were ready to go out the door, their daughter came home with her date. After being informed of the problem, their daughter's date said he could get the peanut out. The young man told the father to sit down, then proceeded to shove two fingers up the father's nose and told him to blow hard. When the father blew, the peanut flew out of his ear. The mother and daughter jumped and yelled for joy. The young man insisted that it was nothing and the daughter took the young man out to the kitchen for something to eat. Once he was gone, the mother turned to the father and said, "That's so wonderful! Isn't he smart? What do you think he's going to be when he grows older?" The father replied "From the smell of his fingers, our son in-law." __________________ This message has been approved by Shawn Erroneous - Hoodlum Hardcore

02-10-2006, 06:14 PM
judas_priest Metal Maiden Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Scotland Posts: 650	Lol- that's sick __________________ Images and words are running deep A vision darker than death itself

02-10-2006, 06:14 PM
anticipation i hear animals Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Oakland Posts: 1,431	roflshtiadfloa! "rolling on floor laughing so hard that i am dying from lack of air" __________________ It was hopeless. I'd never felt pain like this before in my entire life. It felt...wonderful.

02-10-2006, 07:37 PM
LesPaul43 Bring da Ruckus Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: British Columbia Posts: 4,056	Lmaonade! __________________ Life's not a bitch life is a beautiful woman You only call her a bitch because she won't let you get that pussy Maybe she didn't feel y'all shared any similar interests When Life Gives You Lemons, You Paint That Shit Gold

02-10-2006, 10:58 PM
jazzfromhell SHAKE! Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: On the A train. Posts: 192	A priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk into a bar, and that's just the first guy.