Trampled by fatties at Wal Mart on black Friday

That could actually happen..

Thought you were going to burp; vomits instead and chokes on it.

Gets shot by a cop for j-walking, then gets throat ripped out by Deputy Otter.

Runs into George Zimmerman

Runs into a death.

Tries to fart, actually poops, commits suicide in embarrassment

Watches one of the modern SpongeBob episodes, where the disappointment of what has become of a once great show is enough to send you into a spiral of alcohol and drug fueled depression that leads to you jumping off of a cliff while on fire, where you commit seppuku in midair and land on a minefield.

Gets killed by an insane psycho

Runs naked through the streets on LSD, gets hit by a bus

I'm offensive, and I find this fat.

Watches a modern episode episode of SpongeBob. Realizing how terrible this once great show has become, you go on a homicidal rampage. You go to Nickelodeon Studios and find where the SpongeBob staff work. You just start opening fire, killing writers left and right. You decide to set the place on fire. The police are called and you are shot. However, you are still not dead. Bleeding out, you get an evil grin on your face, pull a device with a button on it, and say "I'll be waiting for you in Hell, mother****ers" whilst pressing the button that sets off a bomb you planted earlier. The entire studio blows up, thus ensuring both your death and the death of any more ****ty SpongeBob episodes.

Just dies cause God said it was his time.

Dies of lack of creativity.

Hesitates to move out of the hospedaje and is killed by Crackity Jones.

Gets killed by 10 millions of sludge from New york and New jersey.

Peacefully

In a BBW orgy, Death by snu-snu

In a vat of hot gravy!

Her hotness causes her to spontaneously combust

In my arms, by the bicycle rack after school!

By drinking too much slick 50, her slick 50 starts to run like a V8 engine, which then eventually combusts and gets throat ripped out by mechanic-otter.

Right after I run you over with Triss's bike.

Burned at the stake like all her previous lives..

All good witches go out that way! ;)

By smoking terrible dope you bought in the hood.

Made an inflammatory remark about midgets to your tall friend who turns out to be three midgets standing on top of each other. Then you die of laughter.

Brain liquification from an amplified bass sax drone

Old age.

Death by fish and chips

I'm gonna hold you to that one

Died in a cab with a cutie.

Trying to save loved ones from a wildfire

Ran into wall on wrong platform for the train to Hogwarts.

Bludgeoned to death/drowned by high powered water hoses of firefighters who are trying to put out wildfires but not realizing you're in the line of their water

Murdered by Tim Curry

A bizarre yet tragic curling iron accident

skin cancer

While lounging in the bath, someone plugs in the radio and tosses it in the tub

Pecked to death by a hoard of rabid, murderous birds you tried to make friends with and failed.

Hahahaha! Nicely done. My bird fetish is pretty lame.

Murdered by someone jealous of your flesh lamp.

Slips in a banana peel and then a huge piano falls on her.

Victim to a very comedic death.