Friendships
 

I may come off as a total bastard with this thread, but I'm in a rotten mood anyway so who cares right? Anyway, I was just thinking the other day that friends can be a total pain in the ass. Now, as you all know ( or should know by now ), I am virtually friendless, except for one girlfriend that I more or less have just for the sake of it. There is no logical reason why hanging out with her or maintaining contact should be such a strain, she's smart and funny, but it seems like more of an obligation than a pleasure. I haven't yet concluded if I'm simply a lazy bastard, seriously anti-social or have simply yet to find someone ( in real life that is ) that is fully compatible with me. She's basically the one that seeks out contact with me, and I have to say that I don't miss it the least bit.

Does anyone else think human contact is overrated? Because I do, which is why the internet is perfect for me, I speak to who I want to, whenever I want to...although I have noticed my social skills seem to be lacking as of late, I've always hated small talk, but now it seems like I can't even answer a simple " how've you been" without embarrassing myself or totally blocking...sure, I can say "fine, fine, thanks" but then the black hole of awkward silence sets in and I wish Scotty finally hears my plead and beams me the fuck out.

Why this need for social contact? Are human being really that pathetic that they need constant interaction so as not to feel alone and , I dunno, face their fears or summink? Silence is seriously under appreciated...

How many friends do you have? Is that enough, too little, do you care? How do you find maintaining those friendships, a strain or a pleasure?

I have maybe 3 people that I consider myself to be really close friends with.
As far as i`m concerned thats plenty.
I don`t socialise with anyone I work with for the simple reason they`re a bunch of c*nts , and I consider going out with them a waste of my life when I can be doing something contructive like reading a book instead.

I only have like 2 friends and I don't feel lonely, bad, or inferior for it. Like said, I rather be doing something worth doing than trying to win over a bunch of arseholes.

I only have like five close friends, sort of. Lately we havn't been close, except for my best friend but I she knows I don't have the emotional energy? To deal with friendships at the moment.

They are pretty overrated.

Having friends in highschool is easy, it's until after you've all gone your separate ways that maintaining friendships starts to be a chore and a strain.

i also have mabey two or 3 friends im close with, but over the years i've had mabey 30 or so...

i like getting to know many different people at my school, it helps educate, make you more then just a one-dimensional person. I dont actually understand how you can call it "overrated", its one of the most important things in life in my opinion.

i wouldn't know nearly as many good bands if it hadn't been for talking with various stereotypes(wigger, punk, emo, goth, gangster, or preppy)

i think you should just try to not be over-critical, and just put some effort into getting to know people-generally most people like talking about themselves(as you can see by me), and if your willing to listen its a clinch.

Not when shit always seems to start up and you really don't have the energy to put up with it and argue and make up and shit.

I much prefer my own company. I've been described as anti social by my own family before now.
The truth is, I've discovered over the years...is the more friends you have, the more problems you have.

I've always felt like an outsider looking in on the world.
I don't lack confidence, I don't find it hard to make friends, but I do at certain periods in my life, feel the need to be left alone.

I know exactly where your coming from adidasss.

And what's more, when I get like that I really don't care what people think.
I used to...the awkward silences and the, "what the fucks up with you" comments.

The people who really know me, know when to leave me alone.

I love getting to know new people, it's just that I get bored with them pretty quickly. The getting to know them part is the most interesting part of the relationship really, after that it's all down hill....in most cases that is. And putting effort into relationships is really not my kind of thing, I want everything to come easy and naturally or I'd rather not have it at all.

I used to have a large group pf friends, but when I lost my best mate they 99% turned their back on me. So it's just me and the guys which consists of 5 guys and 2 girls, tis small and secure, i'm happy:) And I have you guys of course lol

i have 2 friends, id consider close, and about 5 people i can manage to talk to otherwise in school, i dont talk, teachers thought i had soem depression disorder, they wanted me to go on some sortof drug, i wa sliek know, ever hear dof soemthing called different personalities.

well...that sort of explains it...too have a relationship will be crap-me and one of my better friends get into a fight nearly every day, but do we drag it out no, and hour later we don't mention it anymore "what is there to say?".

Keeping friends will be a bitch sometimes, especially if a friend you known for a long time grows up to be someone rather different, but look past that crap.

i dont see, at least from expireance it going "downhill", i can generally tell what a person will be like from the first time i meet them..

i dont have a family
besides my mom
my mom and dad split when iw as 10, complex ****... but, yeah no one calls me from either my mom or my dads side, when i got to my dads i go upstairs, the whole other family buisness is jsut weird. I dont really like people, they piss me off with their plastic idelas, and brainless and uinformed views, carrying on if the end of the world would come if they liek omg be not bought a new sports car

7 friends isn't a large group of people?! How on earth do you manage?! I barely manage this one girl, even that is a total inconvenience most of the time.

get to know people...no body is as shallow as that..

except people on tv, but they dont really count

Like I said it's small and secure, and I have severe insecurity issues, so I get well loved, and taken care of. Thats just my main group, I have other friends but they're the ones I loves:)

im uber uber uber really shy IRL.
i have issues, even with checkout line people, mm'k
i do have one friend that im uber seriousley thinking about asking out so i can have someone to be with, but its gonan take an uber amount of getting over the shyness to ask

mabey if you didn't say uber every other word you'd have more friends..

I've figured out that you know when you've got a really good friend is when you don't have to try very hard to keep the conversation flowing. When I get together with this girl it's a constant struggle to think of the next question to ask, I have to think when she's answering so I can avoid the much dreaded awkward silence. And I swear the phone conversations with her are the worst, the woman just stands there in total silence waiting for me to say something , and naturally, since my small talk skills are non-existent, I start sweating and it all just..isn't pleasurable at all!!

I used to think that until I realized how pathetic the alternative was. I have alot of friends but only a few that I count as close. That's the way it should be imo. A friend is someone who will support you and take care of you and they know you'd do the same.

dont worry thats called having a girlfriend....i mean well for you...well i guess it could be the same...


i suck ass at starting conversations with chicks too, luckily i have a mate who is good at pulling me into the conversation and get things going for me

Go for it. Listen, you'll probably livee the averege human life span, but you only live it once. Mistakes are cool, all the pain if she says no, is so worth it, just to feel that sensation. Then the next and the next. Plus all the emotions, by the time you've made all these stepping stones you'll look back and realised you lived. Dont put your heart out there means you've never lived.

Yes, well, that's all fine and dandy, but doesn't hanging out with them, take away from your free time?? I hate it when I don't have complete control of my free time...which is all the time really...:yeah:

I'd say more...but I can't get a word in fucking edgeways.

You're saying you don't know I'm gay? It's a girl that's a friend ferchrissake...

Here's how you do it old timer, you quote the part you wanna adress and don't give a fuck if we've gone past it because you were too slow. ;)

*goes to bed*

no..i knew..i just couldn't think of a way to word it politely...after seeing what oojay got im trying to be extra careful with what i say

Oh don't worry about it, if you come off as anti-gay we'll just verbally rape you so you'll be forced to leave the forum...so, what were you gonna say?

o boy....
um...mabey ill share my political views later on....

It's wierd with me, I'm like the guy everyone knows becausethroughout the year, I made friends with pretty much all the different groups in year 7, and this year, I've found it hardto make friends I truly call great friends.

My friends who I will never ge sick of consist of... Damo, Brandon, James, Jake, Ryan, Jeremy, Ash and Rhiannon. I have ALOT of people I hang around with, I used to range from around... 40-80 people, but ever since I met ash<3 I found out they're a bunch of wankers. You're always guna meet c*nts, you're always gunna have to put up with ignorant, unfunny, stupid bastards. But I foundthats the key to making friends, just tolerate everyone.

hmm, friends that i see or talk to on the phone once a month : about 4-5 depending how often I go out that month
then there's my husband and a group of 7 mommies that I have been seeing once a week for the last 10 months...

and yes, what you said about humans being that pathetic to need interaction is exactly why and apparantly why you are here :)

I have a few good friends, but I dont see them all that often, because if i'm not working, i'm skiing. They dont ski so....

aside from that, I meet people every time I go skiing, so durring the winter, most of the socializing I do is on the ski hill. Which suits me just fine, skiers and boarders are good people

I only have 3-4 good friends (and they're all 20-30 years older than I am)
My other friends are more like associates, I live with 5 other people and at least 23 and a half hours of each day I would prefer not to talk to them.
They all think I'm an *******.

I have 3 "real friends" but I'm a very talkative person and would willingly socialize with just about anyone.

I decided I had to share my amusing conversation with my friend. This is why I'm friends with skiers, they're an entertaining bunch

Singel - So much hatred and apathy says:
i might still have to bid on those skis
Singel - So much hatred and apathy says:
despite my financial disability as of present
Alli - knee deep powder, getting to the summit as the ropes drop, ER5 open...PERFECT DAY!!! says:
haha
Alli - knee deep powder, getting to the summit as the ropes drop, ER5 open...PERFECT DAY!!! says:
you could always give blood for money
Singel - So much hatred and apathy says:
as a career?
Singel - So much hatred and apathy says:
i think that would affect my skiing
Alli - knee deep powder, getting to the summit as the ropes drop, ER5 open...PERFECT DAY!!! says:
hahaha
Singel - So much hatred and apathy says:
and would make me too cold
Alli - knee deep powder, getting to the summit as the ropes drop, ER5 open...PERFECT DAY!!! says:
might make a good conversation starter though
Alli - knee deep powder, getting to the summit as the ropes drop, ER5 open...PERFECT DAY!!! says:
"so what do you do?"
"I sell my blood"

oh gawd, i totally agree with you, there. i have the same problem in dating relationships. once i get to know a person, the excitement is gone and i totally lose interest. and i dont even feel bad about it! i know i should..

Real life interaction is a lot more different than internet communication.

I wonder what a psychologist would have to say about us. :D

I'd say I have about 6 close friends in Birmingham who I hang around with most of the time and whenever we go out to pubs, clubs or the cinema, it's with each other. There's about 30 other people who I could call 'associates' and who, with almost no exception, I get on well with but whom don't get much inclusion in my social plans.

In total, I've probably spoken to less than 100 people in this city (if you exclude shop assistants), so I'd say my ratio of talking:befriending people is very high. People tend to like me a lot in person, as I come across as very sweet, innocent and friendly.

Gregarious people are a mystery to me.