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View Poll Results: shoul I stay or should I go?
have no contact and move on..... 2 50.00%
work towards our goal of being together again with the baby... 2 50.00%
Voters: 4. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 03-11-2005, 12:31 PM   #1 (permalink)
punk rock mommy
 
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Default should I stay or should I go?

please consider carefully the reasons before helping me out with this...this is really serious....
pro's of us together-resonably good sex
-he loves me and I love him
-he married me
-he is the responsible one in the relationship when it comes to paying bills
-lots of fun to be with

con's of us together-I was a drug addict to crack and cough syrup after I met him
-I was messed(but gave up my baby to be back with him)
-I overdosed and died on his methadone(my fault but it happened)
-he is clean now but I am REALLY afraid that he might relapse very easily
-he is obsessive compulsive collector, really bugs me cuz it is almost ridiculous the **** he keeps
-can be very childish sometimes
-is a schitzophrenic, not harmful, but it is a pain in the ass having to make sure he don't hurt himself on the times he does schitz out
-always have to remind him to take his meds
-never helps with hardly ANY housework

so anyway, I lived with the guy for 2 years, and married him, but we are seperated for a short time right now.....I wanna see what you guys think, so I can really make the right decision once I get an idea.....
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Old 03-11-2005, 12:54 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Im not gonna vote on the poll, that just seems to me like Im making the decision. And PLEASE I beg of you dont rely on this poll to make your decision! That wouldnt be the best of ideas...

But anyway, if it was me, I'd stay.
To be honest, seeing as youre seperated for the time being, you might be feeling a bit more bitter towards him (even if you dont realize it). So there's gonna be more con's than pro's really.. The pro's youve got are important, theyre needed in a good relationship and are hard to come by. Most of the con's you could work on, but you'd obviously need his help with that, and if he doesnt want to help then it's not much good trying.
And all relationships need work, theyre never easy. No matter what... Which Im sure you know anyway, tis just one of those lovely facts of life..

Hmmm right Im running out of what I was gonna say now, I had loads more points than that to bring up, damn.. Anyways, all I can say is don't stay together ONLY for the kids. I hate it when parents do that, its one of the stupidest things they can do ever. Mine did, and all they did was argue for years and made everyone's life a living hell. It was the worst decision ever. Please dont do that, if the parents really can't get along then don't put the kid through the torture of listening to them argue all the time..

Right, I really am done now. Sorry Im no help at all, I did have more things to say, honest!
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Old 03-11-2005, 12:56 PM   #3 (permalink)
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that is just what I am worried about, if things don't work out after we get moved in together again...then I have put my kids throught hell!
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Old 03-11-2005, 01:00 PM   #4 (permalink)
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If things dont work out after you've both tried your best, then there's not much mroe you can do. Just keep working at it, if it was me then I'd have moving out as my very last option... But hey, I have no way of knowing what you guys are like together, so I cant say at all really. Sorry, I try!!
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Old 03-11-2005, 01:05 PM   #5 (permalink)
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thanx anyway~ I will wait a month till the pol closes and then weigh my options for myself...remember, this is for research purposes only...
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Old 03-11-2005, 01:09 PM   #6 (permalink)
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sounds to me like youve already pretty much made up your mind. The pros you listed arent something that you have control over, and are very important in a relationship just as Artist said, and the cons look like they can be solved (or at least helped) with a little professional help (meetings, counseling, etc.). All you need to really ask yourself is if the energy you spend worth it (if its yes, then theres your answer youre looking for), and how much energy is he willing to give (you shouldnt have the world on your shoulders alone, thats why they call them "partners")
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Old 03-11-2005, 01:21 PM   #7 (permalink)
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yes, I do worry about if it is a waste of energy....if I try really hard and he don't change or goes back to theway he used to be, then it is all for nothing...
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Old 03-11-2005, 04:48 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anarchy doll
-he loves me and I love him
Stay with him, no questions asked. The rest is irrelevant if that is in fact true.
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Old 03-12-2005, 06:10 AM   #9 (permalink)
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i reckon if ure both totally committed to making it work then it can happen but if ure not committed it wont work.....
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Old 03-12-2005, 08:14 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anarchy doll
-can be very childish sometimes
i wonder why?! ok, sorry to be the party pooper..i really am, but please, enough of this- im seriously starting to question your sanity!!!!!
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