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Old 12-31-2014, 12:06 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Smile Ask Varg Vikernes Anything (Colored People Welcome)

Hello Musicbanter,

It is I, Varg Vikernes (yes, really! ), and it has come to my attention that a number of people hold some rather... unfortunate views about me. I don't know why so many people seem to hate me. I'm a pretty fungi (lol) and enjoy a good traditional Norwegian folk dance as much as anyone. I'm sure it's all a terrible misunderstanding brought about by communists, the media, and Jews. So, ask me anything you wish, and I will answer to the best of my abilities, hopefully clearing up any misunderstandings and misinformation. I hope very much to get to know each and every one of you in the days to come.

Odin be with you,

Varg
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:07 PM   #2 (permalink)
cooler commie than elph
 
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What's your favourite type of bra?
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:09 PM   #3 (permalink)
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We're gonna need some proof. Burn down a church or something.
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:09 PM   #4 (permalink)
SOPHIE FOREVER
 
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Do you want to jam?
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:10 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I can just shoot 'em an email whenever I want, we're on good terms.
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Hmm, what's this in my pocket?

*epic guitar solo blasts into my face*

DAMN IT MONDO
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:21 PM   #6 (permalink)
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What's your favourite type of bra?
Bras are tools of Judeo-Christians created to objectify women, so I do not like any of them. To go natural, as did our foremothers, is the only acceptable way for a proper woman to dress if we hope to throw off the yolk of our Jewish overlords.

P.S. Good to see a fellow Viking!

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We're gonna need some proof. Burn down a church or something.
Ah, the beauty of innocent youth. I remember such times fondly. Unfortunately the Jews are watching me like hawks (or vultures), so were I to so much as jaywalk I'm sure they would use that to further persecute me.

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Do you want to jam?
I would love to! Unfortunately all of my instruments were recently stolen. I'm sure I don't have to tell you what group of people likely did so. They also stole my television (wink, wink, nudge, nudge).
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:22 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I can just shoot 'em an email whenever I want, we're on good terms.
I receive so many emails, but it always good to hear from my dedicated fans. I would just please ask them to refrain from sending me dog excrement (lol).
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:36 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Still no proof.

Post a pic of yourself with a newspaper from today, or should this be in the form of a question Alex?
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:39 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Doritos: original or cool ranch?
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There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:44 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Still no proof.

Post a pic of yourself with a newspaper from today, or should this be in the form of a question Alex?
Please forgive me, but I do not receive any newspapers. Too much Jewishness. All of my news comes from online Aryan newsletters.

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Doritos: original or cool ranch?
Pringles or not at all.
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