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MicShazam 09-07-2018 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 66Sexy (Post 1995059)
My favorite story from my mother about her and my aunts and uncles was when they were all lined up for some transgression and she got unfairly blamed for something and got smacked in the face (spanking is a thing with us but getting smacked in the face is our preferred punishment). She knew that she wasn't responsible for whatever and so she just started laughing at the absurdity of it all and my grandfather couldn't handle it and just was like, "What the **** are you laughing at?" and she just kept laughing and probably got the **** beat out of her and I like to think that she laughed the whole time like a deranged maniac cause that would be the only justice in the situation.

Knowing me I probably would have been the same but would have adopted an antagonistic approach kinda sort of like Good Will Hunting with Will asking to get hit by the wrench, "Cause **** him that's why." I would have been a constant target for abuse but I would have been unhinged and laughed in his face until he didn't even know what was going on which would have made me laugh even more until I'd have needed therapy just to not associate violence with humor.

That's ****ed up. But for both your's and Plankton's story, I'm thinking the silver lining is that someone just laughing their asses off while you're beating them must make you feel pretty damn pathetic.

Quote:

Originally Posted by 66Sexy (Post 1995059)
Note how I associate all negative things with humor.

Got an admission to make that might offend Americans. I chuckled at a "1 minute of silence" event at the high school I was at back in 2001, just the same day as the 9/11 attacks. Everyone was all quiet and staring into the floor. Except this guy standing a bit away from me. He was trying to eat an apple really quietly, but you could hear that slow motion crunch so clearly. Just too absurd to bear, so I laughed and everyone gave me this stare that made me feel like a giant *******.

The Batlord 09-07-2018 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plankton (Post 1995064)
Well, now you're just projecting. Who knows, maybe you'd have gotten laid sooner in the 1800's.

I'd have been shunted into a family house where no one outside of the family knew where I existed, assuming I was part of the middle class part of the family who had the money to hide me, or if I was part of the working class side of the family I'd have been kept in the small family home and considered a homosexual.

There's no way possible that I would have been integrated into the family in a normal way cause... I couldn't have been. There's a reason I'm the black sheep of the family. There are members of the family who are like me in their anti-functionality, but I am absolutely the hopeless one.

OccultHawk 09-07-2018 03:13 PM

The best thing I ever did was cut the poisonous family members out of my life. Unless it works for me **** a family member. I ain’t got time for sentimentality.

OccultHawk 09-07-2018 03:16 PM

Quote:

I am absolutely the hopeless one.
You hold down a job. A ****ing hard one, too.

Plankton 09-07-2018 03:17 PM

That explains and confirms a lot. Try not to get that on anyone.

The Batlord 09-07-2018 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MicShazam (Post 1995066)
That's ****ed up. But for both your's and Plankton's story, I'm thinking the silver lining is that someone just laughing their asses off while you're beating them must make you feel pretty damn pathetic.

My mother never hit me like that but I still got hit in a way that ****ed me up. But I almost wish I got that level of abuse cause I like to imagine just how it would have destroyed me in a way that I'd be able to look back at and been even more sick and ****ed up than I already am. Abuse is ****ed up like that. It makes you feel like it's funny after the fact. My entire immediate family has this "funny" story about the right hand side of my grandparents' dinner table where my grandfather sat at the head of the table, my grandmother sat at his left side, and my mother, aunts, and uncles would rush to the table so that they wouldn't get the seat on his right side cause that was "the death seat". That's the seat that got physically assaulted during meals. We all laugh about it cause of course we laugh at it. Abused families laugh at abuse I guess, or at least mine does. I know it's wrong but I still laugh cause it makes sense in our family.

The idea of laughing at getting hit is oddly empowering. I feel like I didn't get hit enough to justify how ****ed up I am. But if I'd suffered through what my mother and her siblings did I'd have something to fight against and be able to shove my face into his face to act as a panacea to my fear. But now I just feel like I kinda got the shaft but not enough to justify how I feel right now.

Quote:

Got an admission to make that might offend Americans. I chuckled at a "1 minute of silence" event at the high school I was at back in 2001, just the same day as the 9/11 attacks. Everyone was all quiet and staring into the floor. Except this guy standing a bit away from me. He was trying to eat an apple really quietly, but you could hear that slow motion crunch so clearly. Just too absurd to bear, so I laughed and everyone gave me this stare that made me feel like a giant *******.
At the time we all would have strung you up but at this point **** it who cares I guess.

The Batlord 09-07-2018 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk (Post 1995072)
You hold down a job. A ****ing hard one, too.

I hide in my own world and do the least possible because that's all I can handle. I don't even know how much this is because of my family's toxic influence or how much this is because I didn't have so many of my family that my relatives did to shock me into being something I never wanted to be. I have several family members who I think legit would be better off living in that isolated island I want to live on where we got island time and no expectations on us to make us miserable. But I got family members who may or may not be the same but maybe all the blows to the face short circuited them so that they became legit successful people and the abuse was somehow ****ing better for them. Man, I don't know. I think I was definitely born in the wrong family. I wasn't meant to be exposed to so many A-type personalities.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plankton (Post 1995073)
That explains and confirms a lot. Try not to get that on anyone.

I will never have children. Never. And if I **** up and do then I'll probably have a mental breakdown from the pressure of being nothing like my family. My best defense against this is simply to end my DNA strand.

OccultHawk 09-07-2018 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plankton (Post 1995073)
That explains and confirms a lot. Try not to get that on anyone.

Is that aimed at me?

Plankton 09-07-2018 03:30 PM

I was always resentful of my Stepdad, which most kids are of their replacement parents, but I had a lot of good reasons, and him trying to punish me in that way was just so over-the-top and comical that I had to use that reaction, which was my coping mechanism at the time.

Plankton 09-07-2018 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 66Sexy (Post 1995080)
I will never have children. Never. And if I **** up and do then I'll probably have a mental breakdown from the pressure of being nothing like my family. My best defense against this is simply to end my DNA strand.

Don't kid yourself, I think you'd be a good Dad.

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk (Post 1995082)
Is that aimed at me?

Naw dog, was just being lazy and not quoting.


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