The queer corner

**Marie Monday** · 10-19-2020, 10:53 AM

You're very right about not needing to experiment to know your sexuality; it was the same for me. I experimented the other way: I did make out with a guy while I was closeted but knew I was gay, just out of curiosity. I felt nothing, then it occurred to me that it might have just been the particular guy I didn't like and I needed a larger sample size, so i made out with another one and still felt nothing. It was all very scientific

, I've never had any sexual experience with guys since

ribbons · 10-19-2020, 11:02 AM

A "larger sample size" LOL. I guarantee you that someone will come along to ask if there was tongue involved in your experiments.

Was there?

**Marie Monday** · 10-19-2020, 02:31 PM

There was.

incidentally I came accross this poem by Elizabeth Bishop, which fits the discussions in this thread pretty well, whether it was intended to be about sexual identity or not (it might have been, Liz was a lez after all)

Quote:

Sonnet

Caught - the bubble
in the spirit-level,
a creature divided;
and the compass needle
wobbling and wavering,
undecided.
Freed - the broken
thermometer's mercury
running away;
and the rainbow-bird
from the narrow bevel
of the empty mirror,
flying wherever
it feels like, gay!

Lisnaholic · 10-19-2020, 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ribbons

Thanks, Lisna. Yes, I agree that my great-uncle was making a very brave statement. I wish I knew him. I'm sorry to learn of the circumstances of your uncle's death and how such information gets suppressed in families, with negative connotations. As you stated, "the guy's entire life reduced to one sentence." May your uncle rest in peace. He has a wonderful nephew in you.

Thanks for that kind comment, ribbons. I appreciate those last two sentences very much indeed.
__________________________________________________ ____________

I avoid handing out unwanted old-timer's advice on MB, but if I were to say anything, it would include this:
All you young-uns ! Ask about your family history, because one day you will be the custodians of it. Find out from your (grand)parents and draw a family tree. If you don't, that information will just disappear; it will cease to be available. So write it down, even if it's boring to you today. You, or someone else may find it interesting tomorrow.

Lisnaholic · 10-19-2020, 03:38 PM

Good post, Marie! Funny gif, well-chosen poem.

OccultHawk · 10-19-2020, 03:41 PM

Quote:

that information will just disappear; it will cease to be available

In my case... good riddance.

**Marie Monday** · 10-19-2020, 04:02 PM

who or what are you quoting?

And thanks Lisna! Elizabeth Bishop is my latest poetry obsession. I think she appeals to me because her poetry reminds me a bit of mathematics: it's a dense language putting a lot of meaning into small bits of text, sometimes requiring a lot of digging to find it. The funny things is that the method of condensing is opposite: in mathematics it's done by making language efficient and unambiguous, but I guess poetry uses the ambiguity of language to add meaning. Also I'm probably not the first to wonder about this, but maybe the habit of hiding sexual identity and emotions played a role in Elizabeth Bishop's habit of hiding personal feelings in clever imagery. Anyway, that's more fitting for the poetry thread

OccultHawk · 10-19-2020, 04:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marie Monday

who or what are you quoting?

Your boy Lisna, BattleAxe

**Marie Monday** · 10-19-2020, 04:19 PM

ooh I accidentally skipped his wise advice because I thougt it was signature!
In my case there's no need to worry though; my grandfather recently wrote up my family history in a 800 page book with family trees and all. It was a very interesting read actually.

Lisnaholic · 10-19-2020, 04:26 PM

Very good, OH !

Quote:

Originally Posted by OccultHawk

In my case... good riddance.

Funnily enough I thought of your circumstances as I wrote that advice and wondered how it might apply. Yep, there may be people we don't want to hear from, or would never interview, but maybe it's possible to work round them and find some good guys in our families, by which I mean the alive or the dead.

10-19-2020, 03:38 PM	#555 (permalink)
Lisnaholic ...here to hear... Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: He lives on Love Street Posts: 4,444	Good post, Marie! Funny gif, well-chosen poem. __________________ "Am I enjoying this moment? I know of it and perhaps that is enough." - Sybille Bedford, 1953

10-19-2020, 11:02 AM	#552 (permalink)
ribbons Music Addict Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 1,265	A "larger sample size" LOL. I guarantee you that someone will come along to ask if there was tongue involved in your experiments. Was there?