Well, if you look up the definition of bad music you can find some freakishly similar to the definition of metal. That is the only clue I will give you.

How does one describe metal? Answer: \m/

Metal...ist krieg

^funniest thing in this thread by far.

This is metal:

http://culturerock.canalblog.com/images/CG_Burzum.jpg

Metal is like the part in Jurassic Park where the T Rex eats the goat

Eww
 

Metal to me is a band playing loud music and screaming at the top of their lungs...

Not very enjoyable to me, but thats just my opinion!!

^Wrong. It's like the part in Jurassic Park where the T Rex eats Martin Ferrero off of a toilet.

Metal is depression, hate, fear, anticipation, regret, enjoyment, (place adjective here), and sex all rolled into a ball of evil and released through the thrashing of a hand on something such as a guitar, bass, or drum or escaping through an unhuman squeal or scream into a microphone.

IT'S THE DEVIL, BILLY!




(Actually, I quite liked how riseagainstrocks put it)
For the record, I think that the show "Metalocalypse" is very true to what metal is supposed to be, even though it's ridiculous.
Dethklok is tight, loud, hard, didactic, slightly Satanic, and just plain awesome.

http://www.thesimpsons.com/bios/imag...guests_tap.gif

SPINAL TAP ALREADY DID IT.