The Fields Are Alive Again (member, tracks, quote, memories)

[PaperHurricanesAndPlanes]

The Fields Of Memories Are Alive Again

I remember playing in the backyard
I was preoccupied
With the pendulum motion of swings

I remember I could barely fit
The rungs of the ladders
In my five year old hands.

I remember that both my hands,
Could fit in my father’s, simultaneously.

I remember the wind,
Are now just memories,
Painted in a mental pastel.

I remember the sun’s incandescence.
It didn’t bother me back then.

And I remember the train tracks.
I remember the bridges,
And their exact location
On the carpet.
And I remember the tune
That building sung.

[PaperHurricanesAndPlanes]

Just for a minute, let's all do the bump.

[sleepy jack]

I remember I could barely fit
The rungs of the ladders
In my five year old hands.

I remember that both my hands,
Could fit in my father’s, simultaneously.

Maybe change it to my fingers could barely get around it or something...or the verse after to something else, using hands twice so close doesn't sound too hot.

remember the wind,
And the bliss that it came with.
Now just memories,
Painted in a mental pastel.

That and there is unnecessary.

I like itt, also get on AIM you hoe.

[PaperHurricanesAndPlanes]

I don't agree with your first point, and I edited a day after I posted it, so that verse has been changed.