Untitled (quote, song)

ZeppelinAir · 02-16-2007, 01:42 AM

i am stuck in a rut of no thoughts and cant escape, some feed back on this to help me get out,

Untitled

Sing me your song and I’ll sing you mine,
Insult me now and I will laugh and you will cry,
Gleaming smile poisons my thoughts,
Making me fuck up as I always do,
Paralyzed by radiant eyes I have no control

Time withers and so do we,
Split apart by an axe in our lives,
We splinter and stab into the closest human
But always hoping to find our way back,
Find away to kill father time and repeat those joyous days,

What happened to you we never talk anymore
Divided we all fall with no shoulder to lean on
Those whiskey eyes have seen much trouble
I wish it would have ended there,
Death is eternal and forever is never
Life is forever…..

sleepy jack · 02-22-2007, 08:41 PM

Quote:

Insult me now and I will laugh and you will cry,

"Insult me now and i'll laugh, you'll cry." or something like that so it doesn't drag on for so long.

I don't really care for this, for one it seems to be three separate poems and its just not that interesting.

ZeppelinAir · 02-23-2007, 02:02 AM

like i said i been having trouble writing anything, my mind draws blank and cant think of shit

skindredluver · 02-24-2007, 10:36 AM

Its iffy so yah iffy

02-16-2007, 01:42 AM	#1 (permalink)
ZeppelinAir Long time no see Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: somewhere in Michigan Posts: 512	Untitled i am stuck in a rut of no thoughts and cant escape, some feed back on this to help me get out, Untitled Sing me your song and I’ll sing you mine, Insult me now and I will laugh and you will cry, Gleaming smile poisons my thoughts, Making me fuck up as I always do, Paralyzed by radiant eyes I have no control Time withers and so do we, Split apart by an axe in our lives, We splinter and stab into the closest human But always hoping to find our way back, Find away to kill father time and repeat those joyous days, What happened to you we never talk anymore Divided we all fall with no shoulder to lean on Those whiskey eyes have seen much trouble I wish it would have ended there, Death is eternal and forever is never Life is forever….. __________________ not that old signature Last edited by ZeppelinAir; 02-16-2007 at 02:13 AM.

02-23-2007, 02:02 AM	#3 (permalink)
ZeppelinAir Long time no see Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: somewhere in Michigan Posts: 512	like i said i been having trouble writing anything, my mind draws blank and cant think of shit __________________ not that old signature

02-24-2007, 10:36 AM	#4 (permalink)
skindredluver Im Just As Sweet!!!:) Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: america Posts: 570	Its iffy so yah iffy __________________ Let them live in the stillness and know the flame. They will loose all and give all.. Boys are like lava lamps: fun to look at but not so bright Coffee, chocolate and men, some things are just better rich