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Old 01-05-2008, 06:03 PM   #1 (permalink)
Groupie
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: London-UK
Posts: 1
Default He's Had

As I'm new to this forum I thought for my first post I would post a song I wrote at the end of last year ...

HE'S HAD...
V1
He's got glazed eyes and a frozen frown
A half empty glass that he cant put down
With last weeks locals on the soles of his feet
He sits there cold without a sound

Chours
He's had a hard life and nothing to show for it
Just another forgotten soul with nowhere to go
He's had a hard life that you can see
Life is been like a prison and he wants to break free

V2
A half burnt candle is his only light
A pair of folded glasses on a family album
Faded pictures just sit on the side
layered in dust of time gone by

Chours

Bridge

V3
His hand on his lap falls down to his side
A tarnished ring slips from a finger
Now's there's no more memories to say goodbye to
As he takes his last breath without a sigh

Chours X2

Life is like a prison and now he's free...

All comments good or bad are welcome....
backwedge is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-05-2008, 06:26 PM   #2 (permalink)
Groupie
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
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I like it...
my favorite phrase is "frozen frown", because it has kind of a double meaning... it says he's cold, so that's one meaning of frozen, and frozen also in the sense that the frown remains on his face always.
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Old 01-06-2008, 12:06 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: canada
Posts: 349
Default

Your song is shallower then a kitty pool.
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Old 01-06-2008, 03:41 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 58
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Doesnt seem to mean much, just a bunch of words put together, trying to sound poetic...sorry
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Is it cruel or kind
Not too speak my mind
And to lie to you
Rather than hurt you?
For after several large gins
He'll confess all of his sins
But still he'll hide from you
Hide what's inside from you
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