New, non-depressing song

deep_and_depressing · 08-14-2009, 06:33 PM

This song is far from depressing, though short. I wrote it to help my baby sister go to sleep . . . No title yet, but any suggestions will help . . . Tell me what you think!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Your body so beautiful,
it rules my life.
And I get lost
in your sweet eyes.
But your sleep so peaceful
it captivates me,
I'll watch you rest
in my arms baby.

[chorus]
Close your eyes,
shut out the light.
Let yourself be
overcome by the night.
Lay down, rest your head.
Sleep now next to
me in my bed.

I'll be laying
with you in my arms.
Hold you tight.
I'll keep you safe and warm.
don't you worry what the
night beholds 'cause I'll
be waiting for you
by the sunrise.

[chorus x2]

Terrible Lizard · 08-14-2009, 07:21 PM

Akira · 08-14-2009, 07:32 PM

I yawned twice reading it. It should be effective on her.

deep_and_depressing · 08-14-2009, 07:54 PM

Jesus, you people hate me no matter what I do . . . I tried to make something not depressing and i getting told to kill myself more than when i wrote worthless depressing ****.

Akira · 08-14-2009, 08:12 PM

I dont hate you nor want you dead

Arya Stark · 08-14-2009, 08:15 PM

It's cliche.

There's nothing new.

That's all.

deep_and_depressing · 08-14-2009, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ToeAndno

I dont hate you nor want you dead

thats why i wasn't referring to you

deep_and_depressing · 08-14-2009, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AwwSugar

It's cliche.

There's nothing new.

That's all.

well OF COURSE its cliche . . . its meant to put a baby to sleep and theres not much to work with there

Arya Stark · 08-14-2009, 08:46 PM

You would tell a baby that their beautiful body rules your life?

asshat · 08-14-2009, 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deep_and_depressing

Jesus, you people hate me no matter what I do . . . I tried to make something not depressing and i getting told to kill myself more than when i wrote worthless depressing ****.

....It's not complex, but I could see it as compelling if delivered with enough soul...you shouldn't be trying to appease people though, write what you feel like.

08-14-2009, 06:33 PM	#1 (permalink)
deep_and_depressing Music Addict Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 73	New, non-depressing song This song is far from depressing, though short. I wrote it to help my baby sister go to sleep . . . No title yet, but any suggestions will help . . . Tell me what you think! -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your body so beautiful, it rules my life. And I get lost in your sweet eyes. But your sleep so peaceful it captivates me, I'll watch you rest in my arms baby. [chorus] Close your eyes, shut out the light. Let yourself be overcome by the night. Lay down, rest your head. Sleep now next to me in my bed. I'll be laying with you in my arms. Hold you tight. I'll keep you safe and warm. don't you worry what the night beholds 'cause I'll be waiting for you by the sunrise. [chorus x2] __________________ My life was like a fairytale . . . Except I left Mr. Charming for his sister

08-14-2009, 07:21 PM	#2 (permalink)
Terrible Lizard **ER OF HOLES Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Butt**, Nebraska Posts: 1,211	__________________ “YOU ARE SCUM SLUT.” -John Martyn

08-14-2009, 07:54 PM	#4 (permalink)
deep_and_depressing Music Addict Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 73	Jesus, you people hate me no matter what I do . . . I tried to make something not depressing and i getting told to kill myself more than when i wrote worthless depressing ****. __________________ My life was like a fairytale . . . Except I left Mr. Charming for his sister